Homosexuals INFILTRATING the Military: A Closer Look

On Wednesday February 3 2010 21:42, Most Holy Mother Tucker <mother-

Post by Most Holy Mother Tucker
I think pert near all of us know by now why the homo sexuals so
desperately wanna infiltrate our armed forces. These people
absolutely live for sex, s-e-x and more SEX. They watch pornography
practically ever day - often at work - even if they're just waiters or
shoe sales boy's. T'other day at the public library - which totally
reeks of alla the vile blood, sweat, tears, slobber, pee pee, doo doo,
gas and smegma of homeless bums so's you can't possibly sit down for
five minutes and read the latest issue o' "Christianity Today" without
a getting sick to your stomach - I seen these two queers - an
interracial couple, mind you - a looking at summa their nasty butt
smut on a public computer terminal just ten feet away from the kiddie
section. In the time it took me to cross the room I could see a video
stram o' this tough looking man take off all his clothes, turn around
and stick his hairy butt crack in the air and spread his cheeks as
wide as they would go. You could actually see a coupla inches down
into his dirty pink hole! It was disgusting!!! Outa no wheres this
thick finger appeared and began a probing said crack. Could the
RIMMING be far behind?!?! The two queers was a whispering dirty
nothings to each other while they nuzzled together a taking in the
sighta the porn star's wet bodily orifices. I went straight (!) -
like I ever do anything any other way - up to that terminal and shut
it off. Then I filed a huge complaint with the main librarian on the
floor. She was obviously sympathetic with them perverts on accounta
she wouldn't do nothing but tell them to stop a looking at such
filth. That old biddy actually told ME I needed to lower my voice in
the library so's I wouldn't "disturb" nunna t'other people up there.
It didn't matter that alla that sick porn had disturbed me - or that
them two queers was a'ready as sexually disturbed as they could get -
she wanted a True Christian like me to be quiet so's I wouldn't cause
no scene. Well - as you can imagine - the queer zebra couple got up
and walked outa that sin den hand in hand while I callt the police.
They sent an officer by and he told me I need to write to my city
supervisor or congressman to stop hard core pornography from a being
put on display in public like that. In this city the queers are in
charge - and they bring ever kinda perversion right out into the open
for ALL to see.
I'm sure if'n God hadn't led me by their computer as they were a
fooling around with it, they woulda proceeded to go thru the Five F's
of Queer Courtship - find 'em, French 'em, finger 'em, f*** 'em and
forget 'em. We can only hope they woulda adjourned to the toilet
first. I hear that a wild orgy goes on in there a'most ever day as it
is. Onced I actually seen this man come outa the men's toilet on a
relatively quiet floor with a big fresh spooge blob a running down the
fronta his pants. SICK! i just know what he'd been a doing in
there. Sometimes I walk by and I hear moans and groans rom the same
toilet. Don't you perverts got no sensa privacy?
And THAT'S the kinda people Obama Nation wants to let into the
military. If''n you ask me - the only reason any queer wants to
infiltrate the military - where they all know they ain't wanted nor
properly allowed by law - is so'sthey can recruit hard young body's
with practically empty heads on top. Even in the Army and the Navy
queers manage to turn everything into their very own sick variety o' s-
e-x. Who knows what goes on up in them planes in the Air Force.
Marines say they ain't got no queers in their brancha the military but
I know better. I know why they call 'em DRILL sargeants too.
BUT - I think it's time we reconsidered our long standing position
against the queer element in the military.
First - let me say that I think it's time they let lesbians in there
a'ready. That's on accounta your lesbians absolutely hate men and can
channel alla that rage and sexual frustration what comes from dull
labia lapping into a good fight against our enemy's. Most lezbo's are
violent too - so I think they'd make good soldiers. Yes - they'd be
all over t'other women on duty - specially in the showers - but they
can be sent into the thick o' battle if'n they misbehave too much.
How they're a gonna handle their mood swings and the bloody Curse of
Eve I can't say. Maybe they can capitalize on their cramps by a
directing their personal pains against al-Qaeda. Most of 'em are
tough feminists what hates Mohammedans and wants revenge for alla the
Arab terror wrought on Our Naion and its best friend Holy Israel.
They can teach the wimpled Arabella's to shed their ugly drapery's and
tell their men no when it comes to a being scullery maids. Just look
at how old Lynndie England kicked Arab butt - and hairy naked Arab
butt at that.
Second - it's true that queers will probably spread their diseases to
many good men in the armed forces - but since they got alla these
careful recruitment strategy's down pat - I think they could succeed
in a sissifying the Taliban and a making them less hostile to us.
they could open more hair salons and nail shops in Afghanistan to
soften up the war lords over there. Look at old John Walker Lindh.
His daddy turnt all queer on him - and alla the queers out here wept
over him when he was tied up and tortured by Our Troops. Them
deviants all wanted to finger and lick his scrawny young body with its
bushy beard and little tufta chest hair a sticking out. A'though
mosta your queers lust after the uncircumcised on accounta their
foreskins are typically cheesy and nasty - they'll go after Arab meat
if'n that's all what's there. So I say send special queer soldiers
into them backward Arab ciountry's and let them do their stuff on the
enemy's of Our Government and Our Godly People. Onced God's Holy
Bible Based Theocracy is put in place, the queers will all be put away
in nut houses and the Arabs will be bombed into the Stone Age - which
ain't much of a journey for mosta them any way's. The queers will
easily spread their lust bugs thru out the whole country side too.
Soon we'll be able to take over Iran without no difficulty at all!
So how's that for tolerance?
Please send LOTSA money to help me with my pro-infiltration ministry -
Reverend Mother Tucker
A TRUE Christian

That was funny! Thanks for that, though. I'm sure that the people I show
this to will be convinced to allow gays in the military. Although I'm sure
that not many people need to be convinced anymore other than certain
Republicans who just four years ago said they would listen to the military
leaders but only meant that they would listen to them if they disagreed with
allowing gays to serve openly.

Anyway, tell Satan I said thanks when you pray to him next!

--
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Bring it back to life with SpinRite!
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Most Holy Mother Tucker

2010-02-06 02:46:44 UTC

That was funny! �

A hyena will laugh at anything. You KNOW I don't preach for your
amusement. I preach to lead sinners to the Lord. It's too late for
you on accounta you've went and blasphemed the Holy Ghost. For that
sin you must surely burn for ever. The smoke o' your torment will go
up for alllllll eternity. You can still ease your endless agony's by
a doing special good deeds for the Lord and His Church. Every act you
perform to help me will reduce your torment by one degree.

Thanks for that, though. �

You're welcome. Why don't you send me a little something to make me
smile - such as a thousand dollars? That would make my heart sing
hymns.

I'm sure that the people I show this to

There you go infringing on my copy rights again. Don't you got no
shame in you? Or is it just smegma on you. You know, as you get
older, your smegma issue's will only get worse. There's only one way
to put an end to them onced and for all - and that's thru Holy
Circumcision.

will be convinced to allow gays in the military. �

Well - lezbo's ARE vicious - and the homo men are likely to get in bed
with the enemy and spread their diseases. I think we all pert near
know the queer element has totally infiltrated the military a'ready.
I naturally blame Dumb Dora for that. Did she invite you to her mock
"wedding"? When the Satanical priest said, "You may kiss the bride,"
did they French kiss for five minutes? At the queer men's MOCK
marriages here in New Sodom there's usually a free-for-all orgy right
after the ceremony. How many o' them have YOU been to, Bill? I know
how you are when it comes to orgy's!

Although I'm sure that not many people need to be convinced anymore other
than certain Republicans who just four years ago said they would listen to the
military leaders but only meant that they would listen to them if they disagreed
with allowing gays to serve

Serve? Don't they usually service instead?

openly.

As in - a marching with a swish for the queer men and a killing male
animals with their bare hands for the lezbo's?

Anyway, tell Satan I said thanks when you pray to him next!

You KNOW I ain't never onced prayed to no devil. You SERVICE Satan
yourself.

Why don't you be my Face Book friend Bill?

With love -

Most Holy Mother Tucker
So good, so pure, so prayerful

Bill Baker

2010-02-06 23:47:20 UTC

On Friday February 5 2010 21:46, Most Holy Mother Tucker <mother-

Post by Bill Baker
That was funny!

A hyena will laugh at anything.

And I laugh at funny things like your preaching. Your point?

Post by Most Holy Mother Tucker
You KNOW I don't preach for your amusement.

I can't imagine why else you would do it. You do such a good job of amusing
me!

Post by Most Holy Mother Tucker
I preach to lead sinners to the Lord. It's too late for
you on accounta you've went and blasphemed the Holy Ghost. For that
sin you must surely burn for ever. The smoke o' your torment will go
up for alllllll eternity. You can still ease your endless agony's by
a doing special good deeds for the Lord and His Church. Every act you
perform to help me will reduce your torment by one degree.

That's a good example of amusing me.

Post by Bill Baker
Thanks for that, though.

You're welcome. Why don't you send me a little something to make me
smile - such as a thousand dollars? That would make my heart sing
hymns.

Just the thought that you provided humor to me should be enough for you.

Post by Bill Baker
I'm sure that the people I show this to

There you go infringing on my copy rights again.

How so? I always attribute everything to you. Where in the copyright laws
does it say that I can't print out your posts and show them to other people?

Post by Most Holy Mother Tucker
Don't you got no shame in you? Or is it just smegma on you. You know, as
you get older, your smegma issue's will only get worse. There's only one
way to put an end to them onced and for all - and that's thru Holy
Circumcision.

But then what would I spread on my crackers I offer to guests? Do you know
how many days of not bathing it takes just to get enough for one cracker?
About a week, and that's if I spread it thin.

Post by Bill Baker
will be convinced to allow gays in the military.

Well - lezbo's ARE vicious - and the homo men are likely to get in bed
with the enemy and spread their diseases.

See? There's an upside to everything if you look hard enough!

Post by Most Holy Mother Tucker
I think we all pert

Pert Plus? Doing some advertising in your posts? Maybe that's how you can
make more money!

Post by Most Holy Mother Tucker
near know the queer element has totally infiltrated the military a'ready.
I naturally blame Dumb Dora for that. Did she invite you to her mock
"wedding"? When the Satanical priest said, "You may kiss the bride,"
did they French kiss for five minutes?

If they did it right they did! Any less than five minutes and it's not a
real kiss, you know. That goes for both gay and straight couples!

Post by Most Holy Mother Tucker
At the queer men's MOCK marriages here in New Sodom there's usually a
free-for-all orgy right after the ceremony. How many o' them have YOU
been to, Bill? I know how you are when it comes to orgy's!

How many orgies have you been to that you saw me at? Did you use an alias?
How many women did you have sex with? How many men? I heard you had an
abortion. Was that after you went to an orgy?

Post by Bill Baker
Although I'm sure that not many people need to be convinced anymore other
than certain Republicans who just four years ago said they would listen
to the military leaders but only meant that they would listen to them if
they disagreed with allowing gays to serve

Serve? Don't they usually service instead?

Only if they're doing it right!

Post by Bill Baker
openly.

As in - a marching with a swish for the queer men and a killing male
animals with their bare hands for the lezbo's?

Sure, why not? It would make the military more interesting. Maybe they'll
do something with the uniforms so they don't have to wear those drab green
outfits all the time.

Post by Bill Baker
Anyway, tell Satan I said thanks when you pray to him next!

You KNOW I ain't never onced prayed to no devil. You SERVICE Satan
yourself.

Is that what Satan told you when you prayed to him?

Post by Most Holy Mother Tucker
Why don't you be my Face Book friend Bill?

Because I'm not on FaceBook.

Post by Most Holy Mother Tucker
With love -
Most Holy Mother Tucker
So good, so pure, so prayerful

And so funny!

--
Hard drive dead?
Bring it back to life with SpinRite!
http://www.grc.com/sr/spinrite.htm

Most Holy Mother Tucker

2010-02-07 05:36:39 UTC

And I laugh at funny things like your preaching. �Your point?

My preaching AIN'T funny. It's supposta be uplifting and inspiring.
It's supposta make sinners feel guilty and ashamed so's they'll wanna
repent.

I can't imagine why else you would do it. �

On accounta the Lord Jesus callt me to preach His Holy Gospel.

You do such a good job of amusing me!

That never did take much effort. But sometimes you was real mean to
me and callt me nasty names. Why are you so mean to me? What did I
ever do to you but try to save your soul from damnation? That's what
my whole ministry is for really.

That's a good example of amusing me.

Why? God's a willing to bargain with people what wants to mend their
way's. Look at the great deal He gave Abraham over Sodom and
Gomorrah. The Lord didn't have to let old Lot and his wicked
daughters outa them wicked city's he burnt to a crisp. That oughta
show you how much He loves humanity.

Just the thought that you provided humor to me should be enough for you.

Well it ain't. Your acknowledgment alone doesn't re-upholster the
car. I got needs, Bill. If'n you was a gentleman you'd reach out to
me with some nice green cash in your hand to help a woman in need.
With with this minor depression a going on donations to the Church are
way down!

How so? �

On accounta I don't get no royalty's outa you - that's how.

I always attribute everything to you. �

Attribute - shmattribute. What I want you to do is CONtribute
something nice and large.

Where in the copyright laws does it say that I can't print out your posts and
show them to other people?

Right on page one. That print out counts as an unauthorized copy. I
got the exclusive copy RIGHT to my own creative work.

But then what would I spread on my crackers I offer to guests? �

Go to the super market and you'll find a hundred different things. Do
you REALLY spread sickening smegma on crackers at party's - or should
I say orgy's? Onced I heard these two queer men a talking. One of
'em said "Ooh! You won't like him. He's got a foreskin with extra
cheese." 'Tother one said, "nd I didn't bring any crackers". And
here I thought that was just a stupid camp joke. Now I KNOW it's
True. I'll have to tell Holy Prince Hubert so's he can include that
detail in his next scientifical study o' perversion and depravity
amongst the degenerates.

Do you know how many days of not bathing it takes just to get enough for one
cracker? �

For some queers it takes every bit o' two hours.

About a week, and that's if I spread it thin.

How big is this cracker exactly? Are you a talking about a single
Southern red neck?

See? �There's an upside to everything if you look hard enough!

Yes. I'm sure you're hard enough too. Haw! Haw! Haw! Are you a
gonna tell me whether you're involved in a "gay marriage" yet?

Pert Plus? �Doing some advertising in your posts? �Maybe that's how you can
make more money!

I'll have to ask the Procter & Gamble people, what makes Pert, if'n
they'd be interested. I gotta be careful o' them though. You may
recollect they were involved in a devil worshipping scandal some years
back and had alla their products stamped with a Satanical moon
symbol. Alla that was cleant up afore I was born - but a teacher in
my private Christian school told us all about it. We had to go thru
our houses and throw out any products with that evil symbol on them
since they were used to bring demons into people's houses.

If they did it right they did! �Any less than five minutes and it's not a
real kiss, you know. �That goes for both gay and straight couples!

I take ot you didn't go to Dora's wedding after all. It was probably
for women only. You know how much lezbo's hate men. Decent folk don't
put on such lewd display's o' personal acts in public. I guess orgy
goers got different value's.

How many orgies have you been to that you saw me at? �

Send me a picture and I'll tell you how many I see you a coming outa
down on Folsom Street. I got me a new e-mail address at the
Repenthouse. If'n you want it I'll gladly send it to you. A weekly
prayer e-mail is optional

Did you use an alias? �

You know I don't never go to no orgy's - but I have led protest groups
outsida sex
clubs all over town to expose the people what does. Why is it the
queers cover up their faces when somebody points a camera at them as
they're a coming out of a gay bar or orgy club what's just been raided
by the cops? I thought they'd be all out and proud of what they o in
them filthy places.

How many women did you have sex with? �

Not one not never!

How many men? �

Only my faithful husband.

I heard you had an abortion. �

That was a TOTAL lie and you know it! I ain't never had no kinda
operation of any kind. I'd kill myself if'n some doctor ever killt my
baby

Was that after you went to an orgy?

I ain't never actually attended none. I just watch outsida the doors
to see who goes to them. We spot several public figures down there
what CLAIMS they're married and/or in "monogamous" relationships.
When they come outa them places with four or five streaks o' strange
spooge on their chaps and ripped jeans or in their chest or beard
hair, you know they've been a fooling around big time - while the
little hubby is back at home - very likely a getting it on with the
pizza boy!

Only if they're doing it right!

See. Ever'body knows it's all about sex. That's what the queer
people lives for.

Sure, why not? �It would make the military more interesting. �Maybe they'll
do something with the uniforms so they don't have to wear those drab green
outfits all the time.

You wanna see 'em all nude instead, HUH? Are you completely against
circumcision too - so's every man can have smegma problems ike your'n?

Is that what Satan told you when you prayed to him?

I didn't never pray to him so he didn't tell me nothing. He's the
father of lie's, so I wouldn't never listen to him no way's.

Because I'm not on FaceBook.

And why not? Practically ever'body else is. Why don't you sign up
just so's you can be my special friend?

And so funny!

If'n you had any respect for me you wouldn't laugh at my ministry.

With love -

Most Holy Mother Tucker
So good, so pure, so prayerful

Bill Baker

2010-02-08 01:22:42 UTC

On Sunday February 7 2010 00:36, Most Holy Mother Tucker <mother-

Post by Bill Baker
And I laugh at funny things like your preaching. Your point?

My preaching AIN'T funny. It's supposta be uplifting and inspiring.
It's supposta make sinners feel guilty and ashamed so's they'll wanna
repent.

Then why do other people I read it to laugh? It can't only be the funny
voice I use.

Post by Bill Baker
I can't imagine why else you would do it.

On accounta the Lord Jesus callt me to preach His Holy Gospel.

Well if that's true he must have known that some people would be amused by
it.

Post by Bill Baker
You do such a good job of amusing me!

So you're saying you get upset when I laugh at you and upset when I don't?
Why don't you make up your mind?

Post by Bill Baker
That's a good example of amusing me.

And he sent a funny person like you to preach, right?

Post by Bill Baker
Just the thought that you provided humor to me should be enough for you.

I might consider donating if you would allow me or a proxy who lives in the
area to come to one of your church's services with a camcorder so that I
could release the video onto YouTube. I'd even add some of those funny
sound effects to it.

Post by Bill Baker
How so?

On accounta I don't get no royalty's outa you - that's how.

If I don't make any money showing it to people then how can I give you
royalties?

Post by Bill Baker
I always attribute everything to you.

Attribute - shmattribute. What I want you to do is CONtribute
something nice and large.

Would you like 80% of the $0 I make showing it to people?

Post by Bill Baker
Where in the copyright laws does it say that I can't print out your posts
and show them to other people?

Right on page one. That print out counts as an unauthorized copy. I
got the exclusive copy RIGHT to my own creative work.

Then go ahead and sue me. See how far you get.

Post by Bill Baker
But then what would I spread on my crackers I offer to guests?

How often does he do this "study?" Once a week? Does he have to use Viagra
when he studies these "degenerates" or is he able to sustain an erection on
his own?

Post by Bill Baker
Do you know how many days of not bathing it takes just to get enough for
one cracker?

For some queers it takes every bit o' two hours.

I can't imagine what they do that takes them that little time. Even having
sex only speeds up the process by a little bit.

Post by Bill Baker
About a week, and that's if I spread it thin.

How big is this cracker exactly? Are you a talking about a single
Southern red neck?

Just a Ritz, or a Townhouse if I can't find them.

Post by Bill Baker
See? There's an upside to everything if you look hard enough!

Yes. I'm sure you're hard enough too. Haw! Haw! Haw! Are you a
gonna tell me whether you're involved in a "gay marriage" yet?

See? You're fantasizing about me already!

Post by Bill Baker
Pert Plus? Doing some advertising in your posts? Maybe that's how you
can make more money!

Maybe that's how you got started worshiping Satan!

Post by Bill Baker
If they did it right they did! Any less than five minutes and it's not a
real kiss, you know. That goes for both gay and straight couples!

I wouldn't have been able to make it if she had anyway. I have enough on my
plate convincing officials to accept same-sex marriage. Don't worry,
though, it will happen in our lifetime.

Post by Bill Baker
How many orgies have you been to that you saw me at?

Don't you mean how many you think you see me coming into? Do you greet
people at the door with a big wet kiss on the lips? Do you get to choose
which set of lips if it's a woman?

Post by Bill Baker
Did you use an alias?

Maybe for the same reason celebrities don't want just anyone taking their
picture. Maybe if you offered to pay them for a picture they'd be more
willing to pose.

Post by Bill Baker
How many women did you have sex with?

Not one not never!

Are you sure? Maybe you just repressed the memory.

Post by Bill Baker
How many men?

Only my faithful husband.

So he was at the orgy, too?

Post by Bill Baker
I heard you had an abortion.

That was a TOTAL lie and you know it! I ain't never had no kinda
operation of any kind. I'd kill myself if'n some doctor ever killt my
baby

Maybe you repressed the memory of that too. It's not uncommon for religious
women who have been to orgies to repress memories like that or to just lie
about them.

Post by Bill Baker
Was that after you went to an orgy?

Well, I think if you're the type of person who goes to an orgy that it would
probably be boring to see someone there that you can have sex with any other
time you want.

Post by Bill Baker
Only if they're doing it right!

See. Ever'body knows it's all about sex. That's what the queer
people lives for.

Well I can't expect someone who either has never had good sex or repressed
the memory of it to understand.

Post by Bill Baker
Sure, why not? It would make the military more interesting. Maybe
they'll do something with the uniforms so they don't have to wear those
drab green outfits all the time.

You wanna see 'em all nude instead, HUH? Are you completely against
circumcision too - so's every man can have smegma problems ike your'n?

Ike? Is that the name of one of the men you had sex with at the orgy?

Post by Bill Baker
Is that what Satan told you when you prayed to him?

I didn't never pray to him so he didn't tell me nothing. He's the
father of lie's, so I wouldn't never listen to him no way's.

That's how I figured you pray to him since he's the father of lies and you
tell lies.

Post by Bill Baker
Because I'm not on FaceBook.

And why not? Practically ever'body else is. Why don't you sign up
just so's you can be my special friend?

I just have no need to be on FaceBook. Although I do get a good laugh out
of the failbooking.com website. It's a site that shows screenshots of funny
FaceBook posts. Maybe if I did get on FaceBook I could showcase some of
your posts on there!

Post by Bill Baker
And so funny!

If'n you had any respect for me you wouldn't laugh at my ministry.

Then stop making it so funny!

--
Hard drive dead?
Bring it back to life with SpinRite!
http://www.grc.com/sr/spinrite.htm

Most Holy Mother Tucker

2010-02-08 05:11:59 UTC

And I laugh at funny things like your preaching. �Your point?

My preaching AIN'T funny. �It's supposta be uplifting and inspiring.
It's supposta make sinners feel guilty and ashamed so's they'll wanna
repent.

Then why do other people I read it to laugh? �It can't only be the funny
voice I use.

I can't imagine why else you would do it.

On accounta the Lord Jesus callt me to preach His Holy Gospel.

Well if that's true he must have known that some people would be amused by
it.

You do such a good job of amusing me!

That never did take much effort. �But sometimes you was real mean to
me and callt me nasty names. �Why are you so mean to me? �What did I
ever do to you but try to save your soul from damnation? �That's what
my whole ministry is for really.

So you're saying you get upset when I laugh at you and upset when I don't? �
Why don't you make up your mind?

That's a good example of amusing me.

Why? �God's a willing to bargain with people what wants to mend their
way's. �Look at the great deal He gave Abraham over Sodom and
Gomorrah. �The Lord didn't have to let old Lot and his wicked
daughters outa them wicked city's he burnt to a crisp. �That oughta
show you how much He loves humanity.

And he sent a funny person like you to preach, right?

Just the thought that you provided humor to me should be enough for you.

Well it ain't. �Your acknowledgment alone doesn't re-upholster the
car. �I got needs, Bill. �If'n you was a gentleman you'd reach out to
me with some nice green cash in your hand to help a woman in need.
With with this minor depression a going on donations to the Church are
way down!

I might consider donating if you would allow me or a proxy who lives in the
area to come to one of your church's services with a camcorder so that I
could release the video onto YouTube. �I'd even add some of those funny
sound effects to it.

How so?

On accounta I don't get no royalty's outa you - that's how.

If I don't make any money showing it to people then how can I give you
royalties?

I always attribute everything to you.

Attribute - shmattribute. �What I want you to do is CONtribute
something nice and large.

Would you like 80% of the $0 I make showing it to people?

Where in the copyright laws does it say that I can't print out your posts
and show them to other people?

Right on page one. �That print out counts as an unauthorized copy. �I
got the exclusive copy RIGHT to my own creative work.

Then go ahead and sue me. �See how far you get.

But then what would I spread on my crackers I offer to guests?

Go to the super market and you'll find a hundred different things. Do
you REALLY spread sickening smegma on crackers at party's - or should
I say orgy's? �Onced I heard these two queer men a talking. �One of
'em said "Ooh! �You won't like him. �He's got a foreskin with extra
cheese." �'Tother one said, "nd I didn't bring any crackers". �And
here I thought that was just a stupid camp joke. �Now I KNOW it's
True. �I'll have to tell Holy Prince Hubert so's he can include that
detail in his next scientifical study o' perversion and depravity
amongst the degenerates.

How often does he do this "study?" �Once a week? �Does he have to use Viagra
when he studies these "degenerates" or is he able to sustain an erection on
his own?

Do you know how many days of not bathing it takes just to get enough for
one cracker?

For some queers it takes every bit o' two hours.

I can't imagine what they do that takes them that little time. �Even having
sex only speeds up the process by a little bit.

About a week, and that's if I spread it thin.

How big is this cracker exactly? �Are you a talking about a single
Southern red neck?

Just a Ritz, or a Townhouse if I can't find them.

See? �There's an upside to everything if you look hard enough!

Yes. �I'm sure you're hard enough too. �Haw! �Haw! �Haw! �Are you a
gonna tell me whether you're involved in a "gay marriage" yet?

See? �You're fantasizing about me already!

Pert Plus? �Doing some advertising in your posts? �Maybe that's how you
can make more money!

I'll have to ask the Procter & Gamble people, what makes Pert, if'n
they'd be interested. �I gotta be careful o' them though. �You may
recollect they were involved in a devil worshipping scandal some years
back and had alla their products stamped with a Satanical moon
symbol. �Alla that was cleant up afore I was born - but a teacher in
my private Christian school told us all about it. �We had to go thru
our houses and throw out any products with that evil symbol on them
since they were used to bring demons into people's houses.

Maybe that's how you got started worshiping Satan!

If they did it right they did! �Any less than five minutes and it's not a
real kiss, you know. �That goes for both gay and straight couples!

I take ot you didn't go to Dora's wedding after all. �It was probably
for women only. �You know how much lezbo's hate men. Decent folk don't
put on such lewd display's o' personal acts in public. �I guess orgy
goers got different value's.

I wouldn't have been able to make it if she had anyway. �I have enough on my
plate convincing officials to accept same-sex marriage. �Don't worry,
though, it will happen in our lifetime.

How many orgies have you been to that you saw me at?

Send me a picture and I'll tell you how many I see you a coming outa
down on Folsom Street. �I got me a new e-mail address at the
Repenthouse. �If'n you want it I'll gladly send it to you. �A weekly
prayer e-mail is optional

Don't you mean how many you think you see me coming into? �Do you greet
people at the door with a big wet kiss on the lips? �Do you get to choose
which set of lips if it's a woman?

Did you use an alias?

You know I don't never go to no orgy's - but I have led protest groups
outsida sex
�clubs all over town to expose the people what does. �Why is it the
queers cover up their faces when somebody points a camera at them as
they're a coming out of a gay bar or orgy club what's just been raided
by the cops? �I thought they'd be all out and proud of what they o in
them filthy places.

Maybe for the same reason celebrities don't want just anyone taking their
picture. �Maybe if you offered to pay them for a picture they'd be more
willing to pose.

How many women did you have sex with?

Not one not never!

Are you sure? �Maybe you just repressed the memory.

How many men?

Only my faithful husband.

So he was at the orgy, too?

I heard you had an abortion.

That was a TOTAL lie and you know it! �I ain't never had no kinda
operation of any kind. �I'd kill myself if'n some doctor ever killt my
baby

Maybe you repressed the memory of that too. �It's not uncommon for religious
women who have been to orgies to repress memories like that or to just lie
about them.

Was that after you went to an orgy?

I ain't never actually attended none. �I just watch outsida the doors
to see who goes to them. �We spot several public figures down there
what CLAIMS they're married and/or in "monogamous" relationships.
When they come outa them places with four or five streaks o' strange
spooge on their chaps and ripped jeans or in their chest or beard
hair, you know they've been a fooling around big time - while the
little hubby is back at home - very likely a getting it on with the
pizza boy!

Well, I think if you're the type of person who goes to an orgy that it would
probably be boring to see someone there that you can have sex with any other
time you want.

Only if they're doing it right!

See. �Ever'body knows it's all about sex. �That's what the queer
people lives for.

Well I can't expect someone who either has never had good sex or repressed
the memory of it to understand.

Sure, why not? �It would make the military more interesting. �Maybe
they'll do something with the uniforms so they don't have to wear those
drab green outfits all the time.

You wanna see 'em all nude instead, HUH? �Are you completely against
circumcision too - so's every man can have smegma problems ike your'n?

Ike? �Is that the name of one of the men you had sex with at the orgy?

Is that what Satan told you when you prayed to him?

I didn't never pray to him so he didn't tell me nothing. �He's the
father of lie's, so I wouldn't never listen to him no way's.

That's how I figured you pray to him since he's the father of lies and you
tell lies.

Because I'm not on FaceBook.

And why not? �Practically ever'body else is. �Why don't you sign up
just so's you can be my special friend?

I just have no need to be on FaceBook. �Although I do get a good laugh out
of the failbooking.com website. �It's a site that shows screenshots of funny
FaceBook posts. �Maybe if I did get on FaceBook I could showcase some of
your posts on there!

And so funny!

If'n you had any respect for me you wouldn't laugh at my ministry.

Then stop making it so funny!
--
Hard drive dead?
Bring it back to life with SpinRite!http://www.grc.com/sr/spinrite.htm
Then why do other people I read it to laugh?

What kinda people are they? Homo sexuals? Orgy goers? Obama lovers?
Sexual degenerates? I need to know more if'n you wanna definite
answer for your scrap book.

It can't only be the funny voice I use.

What does it sound like exactly? Is there a sample I can watch on
YouTube? Or is there an MP3 file I can down load? Is this voice you
use a fake Southern accent? Or is it a sissy queer voice like
Divine's or old Chi Chi Larue's?

Well if that's true he

must have known that some people would be amused by it.

He knows there are exceedingly wicked and depraved people all over the
woerld what will laught at a'most anything. Most of 'em are CURSED to
eternal fire for a daring to laugh at serious stuff like my True
Gospel preaching!

So you're saying you get upset when I laugh at you and upset when I don't?
Why don't you make up your mind?

Are them my only two choices? You either cal me hateful names or
laugh at me? Why can't we talk just like regular folks? I mean
without you a laughing at me or a calling me dirty names. Why can't
you just be nice and respectful to me? I ain't such an awful person.
I even support a letting the queers infiltrate the military now. Why
don't you never gimme no credit for nothing, Billll?

And he

sent a funny person like you to preach, right?

What is it about me you think is funny exactly? You know I'm dead
serious about ever'thing I do.

That would be absolute mockery! If'n you wanna come to Our Holy
Church you know what you gotta do - get circumcised. Even then you
can come into the outer lobby only - but that will give you a chance
to see me in action a healing the sick and a cleansing the lepers.

If I don't make any money showing it to people then how can I give you
royalties?

When you buy a book at a store and laugh at it, you ain't normally a
making no kinda money off of it neither - but still you gotta pay for
the privilege. It's amazing to me how much simple things I wrote on
line years ago keep a bouncing thru cyber space a'most with a life o'
their own - mostly thanks to you and Curtsybear. He's muy friend, you
know, even though he's gay. He sent me some nice pictures that made
me very happy. You could do simple things like that too, you know.
'Tain't like I'm asking you to sell the clothes offa your back to help
support my life style in wunna the finer neighbor hoods o' New Sodom.

Would you like 80% of the $0 I make showing it to people?

Why don't you send me a real photo of you instead? That wouldn't cost
you nothing.

Then go ahead and sue me. See how far you get.

I gotta know where to find you first. Why don't you put me up for a
few weeks so's I can observe ou up close?

How often does he do this "study?"

He does diff'rent one's when ever he can get the funding. Do you got
any funds you could throw our way to spare to aid him in his research
program? You could a'so volunteer as a guinea pig for research into
the effects o' micro scopical bits smegma on the environment.

Once a week?

Not that often, no. Are you a letting your dirty mind run wild again?

Does he have to use Viagra

As I believe I told you MANY a time afore - that drug is completely
forbidden in God's One True Church.

when he studies these "degenerates" or is he able to sustain an erection on
his own?

I'm sure his person attributes don't come into play during his
study's. They ain't sexual explorations. See how dirty your warped
mind is? What ever they may be they're between him and his wife. I
only know that Our Holy Black queen told that she stopped a missing
love making a long time ago. Holy Prince Hubert is a lot older than
she is - and he was indisposed for a long time about ten years ago
before God removed the thorn from his flesh and let him walk again.

I can't imagine what they do that takes them that little time.

They got oily skin and live in hot climates whee the skin cells die
fast. Presto - smegma! You probably have so little on accounta it's
cold in the Midwest - if'n that's really where you live. Some times I
think you could just as easily be wunna my neighbors out here in West
Portal. I hope you ain't the one what puts trash from your car into
my clean trash cans, on accounta if'n you are I'm a gonna flatten your
tires the next time you do that!

Even having sex only speeds up the process by a little bit.

I'd say that depends on HOW you "have sex." Doesn't mouth sex involve
a licking away smegmatical chunks? Sex with a condom - which a FEW
queers still practice here and there in the world - probably increases
smegma production by a trapping foul air near the ding-a-ling.

Just a Ritz, or a Townhouse if I can't find them.

Have you ever REALLY smeared any smegma on an edible cracker? Don't
you think that's weird behavior? Do you got sicko friends what gets
into that kinda thing? There's some hippy's out here still yet what
has placenta dinners.

See? You're fantasizing about me already!

I wouldn't call that a fantasizing. I'm don't mind you a knowing that
I'm married to Thurgood, for example. Why can't you tell me if'n
you're married to Jim Bob - or Serena - or who ever? Are you
ASHAMED? That's why I kinda wanted you to connect with you on
Facebook insteada this weird forum fulla freaks and deviants.

Maybe that's how you got started worshiping Satan!

But I don't NEVER worship Satan and you KNOW that! PLEASE stop a
saying such nasty things!

I wouldn't have been able to make it if she had anyway. I have enough on my
plate convincing officials to accept same-sex marriage. Don't worry,
though, it will happen in our lifetime.

Judgment Day probably will too. Does that give you a boner?

Don't you mean how many you think you see me coming into?

No. As per usual I mean EXACTLY what I wrote!

Do you greet people at the door with a big wet kiss on the lips?

You KNOW better'n 'at! I'm toogood and pure to do such a filthy
thing.

Do you get to choose which set of lips if it's a woman?

Get your REPROBATE mind outa the gutter for a change! And you DARE
accuse me of a fantasizing about you when I just ask if'n you got
"married" yet - and here you go imagining my holy, sanctified lips a
Frenching some strange woman. You are very vulgar!

Maybe for the same reason celebrities don't want just anyone taking their
picture.

They don't mind if'n 1) they look good in the picture and 2) they get
paid for it.

Maybe if you offered to pay them for a picture they'd be more
willing to pose.

Send me some and I'll put your theory to the test.

Are you sure?

Absolutely.

Maybe you just repressed the memory.

No way! That usually happens with people what was abused as
children. My daddy was real strict with me but didn't never abuse
me. He taught me to spurn material things. I didn't even know how to
drive 'til after I got married.

So he was at the orgy, too?

You are INSANE! We are good Christian people what doesn't never go to
no kinda orgy's. We don't even go to party's.

Maybe you repressed the memory of that too.

That's impossible! I remember ever'thing as clear as day. I sure
would remembered anybody a putting surgical instruments into my Most
Holy Place and a trying to suck precious life outa my womb.

It's not uncommon for religious women who have been to orgies

But I ain't NEVER been to no orgy and you KNOW that! True Christians
don't never do such things. We are exually pure and totally faithful
to our spouses.

to repress memories like that or to just lie about them.

Well - I don't never do neither. I am all good.

Well, I think if you're the type of person who goes to an orgy

But I ain't!

that it would probably be boring to see someone there that you can have sex
with any other time you want.

Is that the most common justification gave for orgy going?

Well I can't expect someone who either has never had good sex

That ain't me. My husband gives me ground shaking THUNDER gasms every
year.

or repressed the memory of it to understand.

I don't nevr repress nunna my memory's. They're all special to me.

Ike? Is that the name of one of the men you had sex with at the orgy?

No. I mean't "like". I told you I usually got a baby on my lap while
I'm a preaching on line. I'm real good at multi tasking.

That's how I figured you pray to him since he's the father of lies and you
tell lies.

But we a'ready established that I don't NEVER tell no kinda lie's.
You just misunderstand the simple Truths I preach.

Why do you a'way's wanna rip me off? Why can't we be just normal
ordinary friends? Your old friend Max started a "First Universal
Christian Kingdom" page. He ain't really no Christian though - so I
think it's just a set up to lure Christians in and then make 'em look
foolish. I joint a buncha True Christian groups last night and
preached against the homo sexual lust today. This one queer actually
came on to me and suggested I try some butt sex to get ridda my strong
convictions. Ain't that just SICK? He's even got tattoo's! But I
kept my cool and talk to him real nice and eventually we were a having
a decent discussion about God and the human conscience. I don't think
he's accepted the horror of his own depravity yet - but we were at
least able to talk it thru. Why can't you and me do that?

Then stop making it so funny!

'Tain't intended to be that way. Can't you control your mocking
laughter? Do you tweet over on Twitter? Old Max was a helping me
look for people over there and he mighta sent you something by
mistake. Don't blame me for that. Did you hear the rumor that says
he's a bi sexual? He a'so dressed up like Satan and took on a group
o' True Christians what was a meeting at the local civic auditorium a
few years back? It oughta be obvious he ain't nothing like me!

I wanna hold your hand, Bill -

Reverend Mother Lurlean Tucker
A TRUE Christian

Bill Baker

2010-02-08 07:55:59 UTC

On Monday February 8 2010 00:11, Most Holy Mother Tucker <mother-

Post by Bill Baker
Then why do other people I read it to laugh?

What kinda people are they? Homo sexuals? Orgy goers? Obama lovers?
Sexual degenerates? I need to know more if'n you wanna definite
answer for your scrap book.

All kinds of people. Homosexuals, heterosexuals, Christians, atheists,
Republicans, Democrats.

Post by Bill Baker
It can't only be the funny voice I use.

It's hard to describe. Kind of like a high-pitched Goofy voice with an
exaggerated Southern accent with a few other voices mixed in as the mood
strikes me.

Post by Bill Baker
Well if that's true he

Yes, he.

Post by Bill Baker
must have known that some people would be amused by it.

Well it's a good thing he decided to give me such joy while I'm living on
Earth then, don't you think?

Post by Bill Baker
So you're saying you get upset when I laugh at you and upset when I
don't? Why don't you make up your mind?

Hey, you're the one who came in here accusing all the homosexuals who write
in this group of doing things you've never seen them personally do. You're
either looking for abuse or mockery and I was just trying to oblige.

Post by Bill Baker
And he

Yes, he.

Post by Bill Baker
sent a funny person like you to preach, right?

What is it about me you think is funny exactly? You know I'm dead
serious about ever'thing I do.

That's just makes it funnier!

Post by Bill Baker
I might consider donating if you would allow me or a proxy who lives in
the area to come to one of your church's services with a camcorder so
that I
could release the video onto YouTube. I'd even add some of those funny
sound effects to it.

Nah. You've got to accept my terms 100% if you want any chance of seeing
even one cent from me. I want to see this guy who dresses up as Jesus on
video. Maybe I'll put in some fart sounds while he's walking around. But
don't worry, I'll add them in after the video is made so I don't disrupt
your service.

Post by Bill Baker
If I don't make any money showing it to people then how can I give you
royalties?

When you buy a book at a store and laugh at it, you ain't normally a
making no kinda money off of it neither - but still you gotta pay for
the privilege.

Not if I just read it there. And not if I check it out from the library.

Post by Most Holy Mother Tucker
It's amazing to me how much simple things I wrote on
line years ago keep a bouncing thru cyber space a'most with a life o'
their own - mostly thanks to you and Curtsybear. He's muy friend, you
know, even though he's gay. He sent me some nice pictures that made
me very happy. You could do simple things like that too, you know.
'Tain't like I'm asking you to sell the clothes offa your back to help
support my life style in wunna the finer neighbor hoods o' New Sodom.

Post by Bill Baker
Would you like 80% of the $0 I make showing it to people?

Why don't you send me a real photo of you instead? That wouldn't cost
you nothing.

Well I don't send pictures of myself to people on the Internet unless I know
them in real life. But I do have some pictures of a double rainbow I took
with my cell phone and a few pictures of some caves near me.

Post by Bill Baker
Then go ahead and sue me. See how far you get.

I gotta know where to find you first. Why don't you put me up for a
few weeks so's I can observe ou up close?

You don't need to know where to find me. Just start the legal proceedings
and you'll be able to subpoena the information from my Internet provider.

Post by Bill Baker
How often does he do this "study?"

I already told you what you need to do to get money from me. And I need to
save all the smegma I can for the crackers.

Post by Bill Baker
Once a week?

Not that often, no. Are you a letting your dirty mind run wild again?

Post by Bill Baker
Does he have to use Viagra

As I believe I told you MANY a time afore - that drug is completely
forbidden in God's One True Church.

Ah, Cialis then.

Post by Bill Baker
when he studies these "degenerates" or is he able to sustain an erection
on his own?

Of course they're sexual explorations. You said he was studying perversion
and depravity. Are you trying to tell me he studies only non-sexual
perversion and depravity?

Post by Bill Baker
I can't imagine what they do that takes them that little time.

That's a lame prank if you could call it that. Any prank I pull would be
much more sophisticated.

Post by Bill Baker
Even having sex only speeds up the process by a little bit.

Yeah, but the condoms totally ruin the taste.

Post by Bill Baker
Just a Ritz, or a Townhouse if I can't find them.

Nah, I just offer them to Christians and other religious people who try to
evangelize me!

Post by Bill Baker
See? You're fantasizing about me already!

There are no freaks and deviants on FaceBook? Well, there goes any
incentive I might have had for joining it. Not that I really had any
incentive in the first place.

Post by Bill Baker
Maybe that's how you got started worshiping Satan!

But I don't NEVER worship Satan and you KNOW that! PLEASE stop a
saying such nasty things!

Well, something happened to where you do his bidding and say his words.

Post by Bill Baker
I wouldn't have been able to make it if she had anyway. I have enough on my
plate convincing officials to accept same-sex marriage. Don't worry,
though, it will happen in our lifetime.

Judgment Day probably will too. Does that give you a boner?

Only if I find God sexually attractive!

Post by Bill Baker
Don't you mean how many you think you see me coming into?

No. As per usual I mean EXACTLY what I wrote!

Post by Bill Baker
Do you greet people at the door with a big wet kiss on the lips?

You KNOW better'n 'at! I'm toogood and pure to do such a filthy
thing.

I think you're just repressing your memories again.

Post by Bill Baker
Do you get to choose which set of lips if it's a woman?

You know, I've noticed that the more offended someone gets at certain sexual
things, the more turned on they secretly are.

Post by Bill Baker
Maybe for the same reason celebrities don't want just anyone taking their
picture.

They don't mind if'n 1) they look good in the picture and 2) they get
paid for it.

Post by Bill Baker
Maybe if you offered to pay them for a picture they'd be more
willing to pose.

Send me some and I'll put your theory to the test.

Post by Bill Baker
Are you sure?

Absolutely.

Post by Bill Baker
Maybe you just repressed the memory.

Really strict parents can be abusive too but the children don't know any
better and they grow up with Stockholm Syndrome.

Post by Bill Baker
So he was at the orgy, too?

You are INSANE! We are good Christian people what doesn't never go to
no kinda orgy's. We don't even go to party's.

Wow, what a dull life. Maybe you should go to orgies.

Post by Bill Baker
Maybe you repressed the memory of that too.

That's impossible! I remember ever'thing as clear as day. I sure
would remembered anybody a putting surgical instruments into my Most
Holy Place and a trying to suck precious life outa my womb.

But if they did that and you felt guilty about it later, the mind will
sometimes repress the memory to keep you from feeling all that guilt.

Post by Bill Baker
It's not uncommon for religious women who have been to orgies

But I ain't NEVER been to no orgy and you KNOW that! True Christians
don't never do such things. We are exually pure and totally faithful
to our spouses.

But I've never seen you be faithful to your spouse, so I can only imagine
what you actually do.

Post by Bill Baker
to repress memories like that or to just lie about them.

Well - I don't never do neither. I am all good.

You almost never have control over suppressed memories.

Post by Bill Baker
Well, I think if you're the type of person who goes to an orgy

But I ain't!

Well you seem like that type to me.

Post by Bill Baker
that it would probably be boring to see someone there that you can have
sex with any other time you want.

Is that the most common justification gave for orgy going?

Not everyone needs a justification. Some probably go just because they like
group sex.

Post by Bill Baker
Well I can't expect someone who either has never had good sex

That ain't me. My husband gives me ground shaking THUNDER gasms every
year.

If you aren't thrashing around in bed just before orgasm and you don't
scream during, then you're not doing it right.

Post by Bill Baker
or repressed the memory of it to understand.

I don't nevr repress nunna my memory's. They're all special to me.

Except for the ones of your abortion, right?

Post by Bill Baker
Ike? Is that the name of one of the men you had sex with at the orgy?

No. I mean't "like". I told you I usually got a baby on my lap while
I'm a preaching on line. I'm real good at multi tasking.

Well as long as it gives you time to see Ike.

Post by Bill Baker
That's how I figured you pray to him since he's the father of lies and
you tell lies.

But we a'ready established that I don't NEVER tell no kinda lie's.
You just misunderstand the simple Truths I preach.

If I misunderstand them, they're not simple truths.

Post by Bill Baker
I just have no need to be on FaceBook. Although I do get a good laugh out
of the failbooking.com website. It's a site that shows screenshots of funny
FaceBook posts. Maybe if I did get on FaceBook I could showcase some of
your posts on there!

If you insist. So go ahead and tell me about your depravities.

Post by Bill Baker
Then stop making it so funny!

I'm not so sure. I find both what he did and what you do pretty funny.

Post by Most Holy Mother Tucker
I wanna hold your hand, Bill -

You'd have to have some pretty long arms, then!

--
Hard drive dead?
Bring it back to life with SpinRite!
http://www.grc.com/sr/spinrite.htm

The Lesbians

2010-02-07 00:29:38 UTC

That was funny! ?

Thanks for that, though. ?

You're welcome. Why don't you send me a little something to make me
smile - such as a thousand dollars? That would make my heart sing
hymns.

I'm sure that the people I show this to

will be convinced to allow gays in the military. ?

Serve? Don't they usually service instead?

openly.

As in - a marching with a swish for the queer men and a killing male
animals with their bare hands for the lezbo's?

Anyway, tell Satan I said thanks when you pray to him next!

You KNOW I ain't never onced prayed to no devil. You SERVICE Satan
yourself.

***We Lesbians no longer need your military; we have formed our own....the
ATS

Why don't you be my Face Book friend Bill?

With love -

Most Holy Mother Tucker
So good, so pure, so prayerful

Most Holy Mother Tucker

2010-02-07 04:55:39 UTC

On Feb 6, 4:29�pm, "The ANCIENT Lesbians"

Post by The Lesbians
***We Lesbians no longer need your military; we have formed our own....the
ATS

Oh really? Does that stand for Alcohol, Tampons and Strap-ons? Well
- I'm sure they'll all do just fine at minor home repairs. Don't
mosta you all pattern yourself after old Josephine the Plumber? I
thought you of all people - OK, VAMPIRES - would be happy that I
finally came out in supporta queers in the military. That's on
accounta you lezbo's are typically violent, fulla frustration and
resentment and still yet real good with tools - specially the strap on
kind. Haw! Haw! Haw! If' you want mora my support for your little
cause, you better send me a nice generou$ contribution to help me
spread the Word to other True Christians like me.

You can be my Facebook friend too if'n you wanna. I'm on there under
my own name now. I was real careful not to exhibit nunna my big
bouncy booby's to ignite any o' your evil lezbo lusts none.

With love for even you, O nameless one-

Most Holy Mother Tucker
So good, so pure, so prayerful

The Lesbians

2010-02-07 23:56:41 UTC

"Most Holy Mother Tucker" <mother-***@wowmail.com> wrote in message news:eb15ed29-dae9-4385-8b3a-***@t17g2000prg.googlegroups.com...
On Feb 6, 4:29?pm, "The ANCIENT Lesbians"

Post by The Lesbians
***We Lesbians no longer need your military; we have formed our own....the
ATS

Oh really? Does that stand for Alcohol, Tampons and Strap-ons?

***I've told you previously what it stands for : Anti-Theocracy Sapphists.
Always lying, always bearing false witness.

Well
- I'm sure they'll all do just fine at minor home repairs. Don't
mosta you all pattern yourself after old Josephine the Plumber? I
thought you of all people - OK, VAMPIRES - would be happy that I
finally came out in supporta queers in the military. That's on
accounta you lezbo's are typically violent, fulla frustration and
resentment and still yet real good with tools - specially the strap on
kind. Haw! Haw! Haw!

***More lies from the Princess of Lies, the Devil in Drag....

If' you want mora my support for your little
cause, you better send me a nice generou$ contribution to help me
spread the Word to other True Christians like me.

***I am busy funding some veterans of the Spanish Civil War, bringing them
here to speak on how to get rig of clerical and religious influences in
politics. During the Second Republic, aparently they found a solution.

You can be my Facebook friend too if'n you wanna. I'm on there under
my own name now. I was real careful not to exhibit nunna my big
bouncy booby's to ignite any o' your evil lezbo lusts none.

***Not interested in your boobs.

With love for even you, O nameless one-

Most Holy Mother Tucker
So good, so pure, so prayerful

***So Mad, So Bad, So dangerous to know.....

--
"We are of that generation that so changed the world that future days and
nights can never be the same."

juanjo

2010-02-09 22:12:35 UTC

On Feb 3, 6:42 pm, Most Holey Mother Fucker <mother-

Post by Most Holy Mother Tucker
I think pert near all of us know by now why the homo sexuals so
desperately wanna infiltrate our armed forces.

Max - Didn't you serve in the Army? How many orgies did you get
into. I heard that Taxi Zum Klo was actually a biography of your time
in Germany. Is that true?

The Lesbians

2010-02-10 11:40:40 UTC

"juanjo" <***@mindspring.com> wrote in message news:bdc110ca-6362-4d99-b815-***@z10g2000prh.googlegroups.com...
On Feb 3, 6:42 pm, Most Holey Mother Fucker <mother-

Post by Most Holy Mother Tucker
I think pert near all of us know by now why the homo sexuals so
desperately wanna infiltrate our armed forces.

Max - Didn't you serve in the Army? How many orgies did you get
into. I heard that Taxi Zum Klo was actually a biography of your time
in Germany. Is that true?

*****I saw that movie, when I was in graduate school....horrible.

--
"We are of that generation that so changed the world that future days and
nights can never be the same."

Most Holy Mother Tucker

2010-02-12 03:21:48 UTC

On Feb 10, 3:40�am, "The OLDE Lesbians"

Post by The Lesbians
*****I saw that movie, when I was in graduate school....

Oh come on! Weren't you in graduate school when old Lon Chaney was a
star - and yes I mean Lon Chaney SENIOR. Haw! Haw! Haw! Any way's
- we officially BURN copy's o' that filthy picture at Our Holy
Church's weekly bon fire. Brother Phinehas watched it years ago just
to see how depraved it was. I think it got an 8 outa 10 on the DQ
scale. It's basically a documentary on the Queer Agenda. In it
there's this uncircumcised cross dressing fairy what teaches little
kids in school and makes public service video's about child molesters
that (naturally) feature real molestation. He screws a'most anything
with a ding-dong - even though he picks up a boy friend who loves
little lambs and who gets jealous of all the orgy's that goes on in
their apartment - which are presented in vivid detail. The word
"foreskin" is actually mentioned in the script. Several of 'em are
shown up close and in your face - along with wide open butt holes and
sick spooge shots. The drag queen gets his butt warts burnt off but
takes a taxi to the public toilets to get some quickie sex before the
burns even heal - hence the title. Typical. The Village Voice said
it was a true to life depiction of the queer life/DEATH style in them
day's - as if'n we didn't a'ready know that.

As far as I know - old Max is a pacifist what didn't serve in no
military no wheres. He was named after a character outa Hermann
Hesse. He may be from East Germany - although he told just a few days
ago he's originally from Transylvania. Doesn't that just figure?

Post by The Lesbians
horrible.

True! But do you feel the same way about movie's like "Personal Best"
or "The Killing of Sister George"? They're just as bad. And don't
even get me started on "Caged"!

Deep in prayer for all sinners -
Specially old WAS-bians

Mother Tucker
A True Christian

Bill Baker

2010-02-12 08:48:45 UTC

On Thursday February 11 2010 22:21, Most Holy Mother Tucker <mother-

Post by Most Holy Mother Tucker
Oh come on! Weren't you in graduate school when old Lon Chaney was a
star - and yes I mean Lon Chaney SENIOR. Haw! Haw! Haw! Any way's
- we officially BURN copy's o' that filthy picture at Our Holy
Church's weekly bon fire

You see? By posting stuff like this you're clearly asking for either abuse
or mockery. Why do you complain when you get either one?

--
Hard drive dead?
Bring it back to life with SpinRite!
http://www.grc.com/sr/spinrite.htm

Most Holy Mother Tucker

2010-02-13 03:16:37 UTC

You see? �

Well I sure ain't blind - unlike SOME people we know. Tell me, Bill -
at the end of a long hard day, does the stench o' smegma ever start to
bother you any?

By posting stuff like this you're clearly asking for either abuse
or mockery. �

How you figger? Did the old woman did or did she didn't claim to be a
vampire that's century's old - or at least as old as her idol Natalie
Clifford Barndoor. Why would she admit to a going to see a German
queer porno movie? I mean - there's spooge shots in it! Or so I hear
from people what's actually seen it - which I definitely ain't. I did
read up on it a little though. Just you LOOK how filthy that movie
was. And it was old Juanjo what brung it up - not me.

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0081606/parentalguide

Why do you complain when you get either one?

On accounta people need to treat me with dignity and respect and
kindness. If'n I make them laugh I think they need to send me money
too. How much can I put you down for - I mean that you will
eventually PAY for my evangelical services? I think I could lay hands
on you and banish your smegma.

So good, so Godly, so gleeful -

Reverend Mother Lurlean Tucker
Check out my heavy duty preaching over on Facebook!

Bill Baker

2010-02-13 05:50:23 UTC

On Friday February 12 2010 22:16, Most Holy Mother Tucker <mother-

Post by Bill Baker
You see?

Well I sure ain't blind - unlike SOME people we know. Tell me, Bill -
at the end of a long hard day, does the stench o' smegma ever start to
bother you any?

Not a bit. Does the stench of your vagina ever start to bother you any?

Post by Bill Baker
By posting stuff like this you're clearly asking for either abuse
or mockery.

Yes, that's exactly what I mean. The way you talk about the movie, you're
either inviting abuse or mockery.

Post by Bill Baker
Why do you complain when you get either one?

On accounta people need to treat me with dignity and respect and
kindness.

If you sounded like you were here for a serious, open-minded discussion,
people probably would. But if you are all confrontational and over the top
in everything you say, then you're inviting either abuse or mockery.

Post by Most Holy Mother Tucker
If'n I make them laugh I think they need to send me money
too. How much can I put you down for - I mean that you will
eventually PAY for my evangelical services? I think I could lay hands
on you and banish your smegma.

So you're going to let me or a proxy go into your church services and video
tape them so I can put them up on YouTube with the (in-)appropriate funny
sound effects?

Post by Most Holy Mother Tucker
So good, so Godly, so gleeful -

And so hilarious!

--
Hard drive dead?
Bring it back to life with SpinRite!
http://www.grc.com/sr/spinrite.htm

Most Holy Mother Tucker

2010-02-13 17:35:09 UTC

Not a bit. �

Well then - does it turn you on? I know a lotta men what gets all
turnt on by the odor o' ripe smegma - usually some other queer's - but
sometimes even their own. Are you wunna them?

Does the stench of your vagina ever start to bother you any?

STENCH!?!? How can something what smells like sweet honeysuckle rose
stink at all - much less bother nobody? I'm a starting to think I
oughta back off the smegma issue just a little bit. Down at our
Holiness Help Center there's a lotta men that comes in all
uncircumcised. Some of 'em's very poor - but they still manage o keep
their old thangs pretty clean a-considering. So maybe you're right
ust about that. Then again there is SOME uncircumcised men what
doesn't do nothing down there but think their pee pee is a gonna do
any necessary cleaning for them. And what about alla them men what
can't even open their drapery's completely? How do they know there
ain't little germ city's up inside the perpetually dark, wet and slimy
folds o' foreskin they got.

That said - I will apologize to you for a teasing you about your
foreskin. I am sorry, Bill. Will you forgive me? And will you send
me at least a semi nude picture of you? Please - please - please.
It's for my research purposes only, I promise.

Yes, that's exactly what I mean. �The way you talk about the movie, you're
either inviting abuse or mockery.

I took that from the Internet Movie Data Base. That movie was
absolutely filthy - pure pornography disguised as an art film.
Brother Phinehas didn't even tell me about the butt whupping nor the
pee drinking. I guess some things are too sick even for him. Did you
watch this movie? Did it turn you on? Do you think it was a fair and
balanced depiction o' the queer life style - what with alla the
promiscuity, the VD, the sexual insatiability, the group sex, the
cheating on so-callt live in partners ("Next time, don't just watch,
join in!"), the cross dressing, the interest in child molesters, the
public sex right out in the open, etc, etc? You might as well get a
copy of something what rates 10 outa 10 like "Leroy's Load House".

If you sounded like you were here for a serious, open-minded discussion,
people probably would. �

But I am. Alla you all are just prejudiced against us Southerners.
It's interesting that Curtsybear and Scotty in FLL (who live in the
South) at least understood me a little. Maybe if'n you sent me some
nice pictures you would too. Deal? You don't gotta include no money
if'n you absolutely don't wanna.

But if you are all confrontational and over the top
in everything you say, then you're inviting either abuse or mockery.

I'm a just a preaching exactly what God wants me to preach - straight
from the Holy Bible. Over on Facebook I actually defended a nice
Rastafarian woman that you queers was a ganging up on something
fierce. They were a calling her ugly names and a trying to tell ME
what True Christianity is. I do what I'm a talking about. I
graduated from the best Bible school in the country. So why shouldn't
I write authoritatively - and in my native Southern dialect which I'm
a trying to promote? I can write all Northern if'n I absolutely got
to - which I a'most never do.

So you're going to let me or a proxy go into your church services and video
tape them so I can put them up on YouTube with the (in-)appropriate funny
sound effects?

That would be mockery - and I can't allow that. Onced we get the web
site up and a running, though, I will post a picture o' the Lord Jesus
on there. Will that satisfy your urges? Why on earth would you wanna
put rude sound effects over video tape of a Godly Church service where
the blind see and the lame leap outa their wheel chairs? When my
husband heals the sick and ever'body sings praises to God, we don't
need nunna your ugly scorn. We need bigger CONTRIBUTIONS. We might
hire a True Christian documentary film maker to shoot some video's of
our services to show how wonderful they are to bring more (and richer)
people in. God hates people what accumulates wealth without a sharing
most of it with His Holy Churches - of which there ain't too many to
start with.

And so hilarious!

People what laughs at serious stuff gots psychological issue's.

Jesus saves rotten sinners souls ever'day -
Except for blasphemers o' the Holy Ghost - who must BURN!

Reverend Mother Tucker
God's Own Gospel Lambkin

Bill Baker

2010-02-14 03:53:59 UTC

On Saturday February 13 2010 12:35, Most Holy Mother Tucker <mother-

Post by Bill Baker
Not a bit.

Well then - does it turn you on?

Does the smell of your vagina turn you on?

Post by Most Holy Mother Tucker
I know a lotta men what gets all turnt on by the odor o' ripe smegma -
usually some other queer's - but sometimes even their own. Are you wunna
them?

No, I have plenty of external stimuli to get turned on by.

Post by Bill Baker
Does the stench of your vagina ever start to bother you any?

STENCH!?!? How can something what smells like sweet honeysuckle rose
stink at all - much less bother nobody?

All women's crotches stink. The ones who don't think so are in denial. I
should know, since I know some women who you can smell coming. And that
means that all women stink.

Post by Most Holy Mother Tucker
I'm a starting to think I oughta back off the smegma issue just a little
bit. Down at our Holiness Help Center there's a lotta men that comes in
all uncircumcised. Some of 'em's very poor - but they still manage o keep
their old thangs pretty clean a-considering. So maybe you're right
ust about that. Then again there is SOME uncircumcised men what
doesn't do nothing down there but think their pee pee is a gonna do
any necessary cleaning for them. And what about alla them men what
can't even open their drapery's completely? How do they know there
ain't little germ city's up inside the perpetually dark, wet and slimy
folds o' foreskin they got.

Well they could probably tell by the tiny condominiums and skyscrapers going
up in there. Did you ever try to get a building permit under foreskin?

Post by Most Holy Mother Tucker
That said - I will apologize to you for a teasing you about your
foreskin. I am sorry, Bill. Will you forgive me?

That's OK, it was entertaining.

Post by Most Holy Mother Tucker
And will you send me at least a semi nude picture of you? Please - please
- please. It's for my research purposes only, I promise.

I told you I don't send pictures of myself over the Internet unless I know
the person in real life. I'll send you those pictures of the rainbow and
the cave I mentioned in a previous post if you like. People have said I
take really good pictures.

Post by Bill Baker
Yes, that's exactly what I mean. The way you talk about the movie,
you're either inviting abuse or mockery.

I took that from the Internet Movie Data Base. That movie was
absolutely filthy - pure pornography disguised as an art film.

That's not what the IMDB said.

Post by Most Holy Mother Tucker
Brother Phinehas didn't even tell me about the butt whupping nor the
pee drinking. I guess some things are too sick even for him. Did you
watch this movie? Did it turn you on? Do you think it was a fair and
balanced depiction o' the queer life style - what with alla the
promiscuity, the VD, the sexual insatiability, the group sex, the
cheating on so-callt live in partners ("Next time, don't just watch,
join in!"), the cross dressing, the interest in child molesters, the
public sex right out in the open, etc, etc? You might as well get a
copy of something what rates 10 outa 10 like "Leroy's Load House".

I think it depicts the queer lifestyle about as much as hetero porn depicts
the straight lifestyle.

Post by Bill Baker
If you sounded like you were here for a serious, open-minded discussion,
people probably would.

But I am. Alla you all are just prejudiced against us Southerners.

No, I have friends who are Southerners.

Post by Most Holy Mother Tucker
It's interesting that Curtsybear and Scotty in FLL (who live in the
South) at least understood me a little. Maybe if'n you sent me some
nice pictures you would too. Deal? You don't gotta include no money
if'n you absolutely don't wanna.

OK, I'll send you the pictures to your Wowmail account, unless there's
another e-mail address you'd rather I send them to.

Post by Bill Baker
But if you are all confrontational and over the top
in everything you say, then you're inviting either abuse or mockery.

Leaving aside you typing in a Southern dialect, which almost nobody does
even those who have a Southern accent, you're still way over the top.
Anyone who tries to say that their way of thinking is the only right way,
especially in a group where it's practically guaranteed that almost nobody
else believes the same way they do, is inviting mockery and/or abuse.

Post by Bill Baker
So you're going to let me or a proxy go into your church services and
video tape them so I can put them up on YouTube with the (in-)appropriate
funny sound effects?

Because that sounds incredibly funny! I could add some sound effect that
goes "BOING!" to those.

Post by Most Holy Mother Tucker
When my husband heals the sick and ever'body sings praises to God, we
don't need nunna your ugly scorn. We need bigger CONTRIBUTIONS. We might
hire a True Christian documentary film maker to shoot some video's of
our services to show how wonderful they are to bring more (and richer)
people in. God hates people what accumulates wealth without a sharing
most of it with His Holy Churches - of which there ain't too many to
start with.

Well I certainly look forward to it.

Post by Bill Baker
And so hilarious!

People what laughs at serious stuff gots psychological issue's.

Well it's a good thing for my psyche that I only laugh at your preaching,
then!

--
Hard drive dead?
Bring it back to life with SpinRite!
http://www.grc.com/sr/spinrite.htm

Most Holy Mother Tucker

2010-02-14 06:35:21 UTC

Post by Bill Baker
Does the smell of your vagina turn you on?

No. That would be all perverted. But men are diff'rent - specially
the queer one's. They get all turnt on by raunchy smells. I can't
tell you how many times I seen them a sniffing each other's arm pits
or dirty feet out sida the gay bars. There's cruisy parking lots
southa Market where even more nasty stuff goes on! And I didn't start
the smegma fetish what fills up sp many pages on old Cragislist, did
I???? There used to be an "uncut" sex club out here for queer men to
go to and celebrate the stench. I ain't like that. Maybe you ain't
neither - but you can't blame a girl for asking, HUH?

Post by Bill Baker
No, I have plenty of external stimuli to get turned on by.

Such as what - if'n I may ask?

Post by Bill Baker
All women's crotches stink.

They do NOT! Just how much experience a' you had in that area?
Probably not very much. I think you're all gay.

Post by Bill Baker
The ones who don't think so are in denial.

No way! Women are totally diff'rent from men in this regard. I smell
like fresh spring time rain down betwixt my legs. That's what Thurgood
says and he doesn't never lie about nothing. Neither do I come to
think of it.

Post by Bill Baker
I should know, since I know some women who you can smell coming.

Are they whores what doesn't never douche none? Decent women ain't
like that. And have you ever smelt of a woman what's under went a
Holy Clitoridectomy?

Post by Bill Baker
And that means that all women stink.

How you figger? I call that misogyny in action. Is it possible that
you just like the smell o' smegma and that it doesn't bother you on
'at account?

Post by Bill Baker
Well they could probably tell by the tiny condominiums and skyscrapers going
up in there. Did you ever try to get a building permit under foreskin?

Not personally. That sounds like a queer thing to me. There is a
place in town what does genital piercings. I even hearda some men a
smuggling dope into the country up inside long foreskins.

Post by Bill Baker
That's OK, it was entertaining.

I was only a trying to help.

Post by Bill Baker
I told you I don't send pictures of myself over the Internet unless I know
the person in real life.

Don't you know me by now? Tain't like we just met or nothin'. You
wrote the first hostile response to my first Usenet sermonette.
Remember? It's when you told me about your orgy going habits.

Post by Bill Baker
I'll send you those pictures of the rainbow and
the cave I mentioned in a previous post if you like. People have said I
take really good pictures.

That'll be OK. And send me summa you too. They don't gotta be all
nude if'n you don't feel comfortable a showing me what your foreskin
really looks like - or even if you actually got one to begin with.
If'n you don't wanna send 'em over the internet, send 'em to me by
mail like that nice Curtsybear done. Use Our Holy Church's prayer
box.

Post by Bill Baker
That's not what the IMDB said.

I posted the link directly. It's my opinion that it's pornography.
What AIN'T pornographical about spooge shots, pee drinking, butt
whupping, cross dressing, group sex, butt sex, butt warts, public
toilet sex and the INEVITABLE VD? At least the movie got that part
right

Post by Bill Baker
I think it depicts the queer lifestyle about as much as hetero porn depicts
the straight lifestyle.

Well - the Village Voice said it was an authentic representation o'
the queer life [=death] style. I can believe that. The Village is a
queer neighbor hood. It was probably that foul mouthed Michael Musto
what said it way back when too.

Post by Bill Baker
No, I have friends who are Southerners.

Real friends or sex partners?

Post by Bill Baker
OK, I'll send you the pictures to your Wowmail account, unless there's
another e-mail address you'd rather I send them to.

Yes. Use ***@repenthouse.org . I don't know if'n the wowmail
account even works no more. I can't wait. Make sure the pictures are
up close and VIVID.

Post by Bill Baker
Leaving aside you typing in a Southern dialect, which almost nobody does

Well I do. I guess that just makes me unique, HUH?

Post by Bill Baker
even those who have a Southern accent, you're still way over the top.

You mean AT the top a looking down, dont'cha?

Post by Bill Baker
Anyone who tries to say that their way of thinking is the only right way,
especially in a group where it's practically guaranteed that almost nobody
else believes the same way they do, is inviting mockery and/or abuse.

Even if'n I'm completely right about 'at? Other True Christians agree
with me.

Post by Bill Baker
Because that sounds incredibly funny!

If'n you'd been crippled and confined to a wheel chair for years and
then came to a Faith Healing Servive of our'n and got your ability to
walk restored to you miraculously, you wouldn't think that at all.
You'd give us ALLLA your money outa gratitude, I think!

Post by Bill Baker
I could add some sound effect that goes "BOING!" to those.

Why would you wanna do that? Why do you wanna make funna serious
things? Do you laugh when quack doctors charge people $80,000 to give
'em a shot that eases muscle pain for every bit o' five minutes? I
call that robbery!

Post by Bill Baker
Well I certainly look forward to it.

Would you like to see a live Holy Circumcision documentary? How about
a Holy Clitoridectomy picture? Maybe you'd like to be the star?

Post by Bill Baker
Well it's a good thing for my psyche that I only laugh at your preaching,
then!

But it's TOTALLY serious. It saves souls from the Pit o' Hell ever'
day!

Deep in prayer for sinners -

Reverend Mother Lurlean Tucker
First Universal Christian Kingdom
Prayer Box 424326
New Sodom, Kink-o-pornia 94142-4326

Bill Baker

2010-02-14 07:35:29 UTC

On Sunday February 14 2010 01:35, Most Holy Mother Tucker <mother-

Post by Bill Baker
Does the smell of your vagina turn you on?

Well then you can't blame me for asking either, right?

Post by Bill Baker
No, I have plenty of external stimuli to get turned on by.

Such as what - if'n I may ask?

Wouldn't you like to know!

Post by Bill Baker
All women's crotches stink.

They do NOT! Just how much experience a' you had in that area?
Probably not very much. I think you're all gay.

Post by Bill Baker
The ones who don't think so are in denial.

That's what I said, denial.

Post by Bill Baker
I should know, since I know some women who you can smell coming.

Are they whores what doesn't never douche none? Decent women ain't
like that. And have you ever smelt of a woman what's under went a
Holy Clitoridectomy?

No, mostly religious women who think that they don't need douche because
good old soap and water does the trick for them.

Post by Bill Baker
And that means that all women stink.

How you figger? I call that misogyny in action.

Only if you call saying that all uncut men stink misandry in action.

Post by Most Holy Mother Tucker
Is it possible that you just like the smell o' smegma and that it doesn't
bother you on 'at account?

If I liked the smell, wouldn't I notice it?

Post by Bill Baker
Well they could probably tell by the tiny condominiums and skyscrapers going
up in there. Did you ever try to get a building permit under foreskin?

Not personally. That sounds like a queer thing to me. There is a
place in town what does genital piercings. I even hearda some men a
smuggling dope into the country up inside long foreskins.

Wouldn't it be easier and more efficient to just smuggle them in condoms
that you swallow?

Post by Bill Baker
That's OK, it was entertaining.

I was only a trying to help.

Post by Bill Baker
I told you I don't send pictures of myself over the Internet unless I
know the person in real life.

Don't you know me by now?

Not in real life.

Post by Most Holy Mother Tucker
Tain't like we just met or nothin'. You wrote the first hostile response
to my first Usenet sermonette. Remember? It's when you told me about
your orgy going habits.

Yes, I tried abuse first. Some really religious are freaky enough that they
like that sort of thing.

Post by Bill Baker
I'll send you those pictures of the rainbow and
the cave I mentioned in a previous post if you like. People have said I
take really good pictures.

Sorry, you'll have to settle for photos without me in them.

Post by Bill Baker
That's not what the IMDB said.

Maybe it was a documentary then?

Post by Bill Baker
I think it depicts the queer lifestyle about as much as hetero porn
depicts the straight lifestyle.

Post by Bill Baker
No, I have friends who are Southerners.

Real friends or sex partners?

Who says that sex partners can't be real friends?

Post by Bill Baker
OK, I'll send you the pictures to your Wowmail account, unless there's
another e-mail address you'd rather I send them to.

account even works no more. I can't wait. Make sure the pictures are
up close and VIVID.

Actually, I just posted them on the web. I tried your wowmail account and
it just bounced back. Go to http://picasaweb.google.com/euphgeek to see
them.

Post by Bill Baker
Leaving aside you typing in a Southern dialect, which almost nobody does

Well I do. I guess that just makes me unique, HUH?

A lot of unique people like some pretty strange things sexually.

Post by Bill Baker
even those who have a Southern accent, you're still way over the top.

You mean AT the top a looking down, dont'cha?

Or at least you think you are.

Post by Bill Baker
Anyone who tries to say that their way of thinking is the only right way,
especially in a group where it's practically guaranteed that almost
nobody else believes the same way they do, is inviting mockery and/or
abuse.

Even if'n I'm completely right about 'at? Other True Christians agree
with me.

Even if you think you're completely right.

Post by Bill Baker
Because that sounds incredibly funny!

I'd want to get a follow-up exam by a real medical doctor (i.e., not a faith
healer) first.

Post by Bill Baker
I could add some sound effect that goes "BOING!" to those.

Which doctors do that?

Post by Bill Baker
Well I certainly look forward to it.

Would you like to see a live Holy Circumcision documentary? How about
a Holy Clitoridectomy picture? Maybe you'd like to be the star?

Nah, I'd have to see what you do first.

Post by Bill Baker
Well it's a good thing for my psyche that I only laugh at your preaching,
then!

But it's TOTALLY serious. It saves souls from the Pit o' Hell ever'
day!

If it was serious, why do you make it so funny?

--
Hard drive dead?
Bring it back to life with SpinRite!
http://www.grc.com/sr/spinrite.htm

Most Holy Mother Tucker

2010-02-14 18:30:57 UTC

Post by Bill Baker
Well then you can't blame me for asking either, right?

Let's just say I won't hold it against you! Haw! Haw! Haw! The
problem is that only perverts are turnt on by their own body odors. I
CERTAINLY ain't no kinda pervert - but I ain't so sure about you.
If'n I ever got the chance to inspect your foreskin - and maybe your
arm pits too - I would know right away. You needn't worry that I'd do
you any harm what so ever. I don't even perform no Circumcisions 'til
somebody pays me for the service.

Post by Bill Baker
Wouldn't you like to know!

If'n I didn't wanna know I wouldn'ta asked, now would I? I guess
you're just a gonna tease me more, HUH?

Post by Bill Baker
That's what I said, denial.

But that ain't no kinda denial. I am pure of body, heart and soul.

Post by Bill Baker
No, mostly religious women who think that they don't need douche because
good old soap and water does the trick for them.

Douching ever' now and then definitely helps dislodge the deepest
germs. Do you douche out your butt hole, Bill? A lotta your queers
does that. I think you even mentioned it onced upon a time. Was 'at
the voice of experience?

Post by Bill Baker
Only if you call saying that all uncut men stink misandry in action.

But all men don't cling to their foreskins, do they? Maybe what I got
is misacrobystia - or acrobystiphobia. Why didn't your parents have
you properly circumcised as a child any way's? Were they dirt poor -
or foreign?

Post by Bill Baker
If I liked the smell, wouldn't I notice it?

You wouldn't notice it as a bad smell. Ain't you never seen queers
take off their under wear or jock straps and sniff them? They get
totally turnt on by the smells o' raunchy odors - germs and all.

Post by Bill Baker
Wouldn't it be easier and more efficient to just smuggle them in condoms
that you swallow?

That's more dangerous - specially with airline security and constant
flight delays - but I guess if'n somebody wants to smuggle a lotta
dope in here, they'd do it that-a-way. I think people what uses stuff
like the LSD for their own personal dope trips would be more likely to
smuggle it up inside their foreskins. I wonder if'n that would some
how smegmify it though. Have you ever TASTED smegma - your'n or
anybody else's?

Post by Bill Baker
Not in real life.

What's real for one person ain't necessarily real to another one.
What about old Max? Do you know him in real life? Did you all ever
have any kinda sex? He likes foreskinned men, you know. I think if'n
you joint Facebook you could see how diff'rent we really are. He's
over with the queers a supporting the sham marriages and other issue's
ever' day. He's got all kinda queer friends. Summa them's into deep
fetishes. He even joint Team Foreskin to stop Holy Circumcision. I
joint all Christian groups. I denounce the homo sexuality ever' day
myself. True Christians just love me. Unlike you they GIVE me nice
things - books, dishes, towels, soap powders, doily's, bath room
slippers. Don't you feel greedy not never a giving me NOTHING???

Post by Bill Baker
Yes, I tried abuse first. �Some really religious are freaky enough that they
like that sort of thing.

I don't think so. Truly Religious people need compassion, kindness,
honesty
and $upport - not cruel lie's and innuendo's - which are what the
Italians call enema's. Haw! Haw! Haw!

Post by Bill Baker
Sorry, you'll have to settle for photos without me in them.

For how long? What's wrong with you? Do you weigh 300 pounds or have
a big mole on your nose? Don't worry about such things. I can love
all kinda people - even blasphemers.

Post by Bill Baker
Maybe it was a documentary then?

You could consider it that - except it followed the life of one
particular queer what kinda sorta fell in what he surely mistook for
"love" with wunna them young queer bear types what wanted to move to a
farm. The main queer - Peggy - finally gave in - more or less
agreeing to give up the wild promiscuity for his lover. As per usual
it didn't last. There was the call o' the wild to deal with.

Post by Bill Baker
Who says that sex partners can't be real friends?

Oh - they can be - but friend ship amongst your queers tends to
develop after lotsa nasty sex. Do you have sex with Southern people?
If'n so, you may not a' heard ever'thing thy talked about. Most
queers sex is all about grunts and real dirty talk.

Post by Bill Baker
Actually, I just posted them on the web. �I tried your wowmail account and
it just bounced back. �Go tohttp://picasaweb.google.com/euphgeekto see
them.

They were very nice, Bill. Thank you for a sharing. That little green
bush in wunna the photo's looked just like "The Creature from the
Haunted Sea". Send me more or post the links. And don't be shy. Do
the queer men still tell you you look good when you go a cruising in
the gay bars? Well - maybe I'll think the same thing. Gimme a
chance.

Post by Bill Baker
A lot of unique people like some pretty strange things sexually.

Sexually?!?! We were a talking about my highly skillful Southern
writing.

Post by Bill Baker
Or at least you think you are.

I think therefore I am. Ain't you never heard 'at afore?

Post by Bill Baker
Even if you think you're completely right.

Well about some things I am. I learn new stuff ever' day too. I will
grow in Wisdom for the resta my life - and hopefully even after that
when God gives me the key's to my sprawling Southern mansion in Holy
Heaven. I told the Lord I wanna explore other planets and galaxy's
some day. I just gotta be careful to stay away from the slime planets
in the Spiral Nebula Ganna. That's where the AIDS viruses came from,
you know.

Post by Bill Baker
I'd want to get a follow-up exam by a real medical doctor (i.e., not a faith
healer) first.

And what for? Them pill pushing quack doctors just take alla your
money and do absolutely nothing asida get people hooked on
pharmaceutical poisons.

Post by Bill Baker
Which doctors do that?

A lot of 'em. Then they try to push you into even more surgery you
don't even need. Do you know how many women are pushed into a having
UNNECESSARY Caesarian sections these days when God designed the birth
canal to pop baby's out just fine? It's all about money. That's why
fetus murder was made legal. Tain't about no whore's "right to
choose". She can "choose" to keep her legs closed if'n she doesn't
wanna get knocked up. It's all about quack doctors a taking money so
whores can go on a whoring without no regrets. God will ANNIHILATE
such wicked baby killers.

Post by Bill Baker
Nah, I'd have to see what you do first.

Just look at a properly circumcised ding-dong and you'll see the
advantages right away. Is your lover boy circumcised? Do you all
ever dock?

Post by Bill Baker
If it was serious, why do you make it so funny?

I don't. You just got a sick, warped sensa humor. I think you need
to find an exorcist right now to help you recover your sanity.

Jesus saves even lechers and porno addicts -

Reverend Mother Tucker
God's Own Holy Woman

Bill Baker

2010-02-15 01:21:38 UTC

On Sunday February 14 2010 13:30, Most Holy Mother Tucker <mother-

Post by Bill Baker
Well then you can't blame me for asking either, right?

Let's just say I won't hold it against you! Haw! Haw! Haw! The
problem is that only perverts are turnt on by their own body odors. I
CERTAINLY ain't no kinda pervert - but I ain't so sure about you.

Ah, you're just trying to butter me up, aren't you?

Post by Most Holy Mother Tucker
If'n I ever got the chance to inspect your foreskin - and maybe your
arm pits too - I would know right away. You needn't worry that I'd do
you any harm what so ever. I don't even perform no Circumcisions 'til
somebody pays me for the service.

Only two types of people are allowed to be that intimate with me: Those who
have gone to an accredited medical school and those I have sex with.

Post by Bill Baker
Wouldn't you like to know!

If'n I didn't wanna know I wouldn'ta asked, now would I? I guess
you're just a gonna tease me more, HUH?

I'm sure that's one of your external stimuli, huh?

Post by Bill Baker
That's what I said, denial.

But that ain't no kinda denial. I am pure of body, heart and soul.

So you're denying you're in denial? Isn't that being in denial too?

Post by Bill Baker
No, mostly religious women who think that they don't need douche because
good old soap and water does the trick for them.

Since douche comes from the French word meaning "shower," I guess you could
say that I douche regularly.

Post by Bill Baker
Only if you call saying that all uncut men stink misandry in action.

Neither one. They just didn't think it was necessary.

Post by Bill Baker
If I liked the smell, wouldn't I notice it?

You wouldn't notice it as a bad smell.

But I would notice it just the same, wouldn't I?

Post by Most Holy Mother Tucker
Ain't you never seen queers take off their under wear or jock straps and
sniff them? They get totally turnt on by the smells o' raunchy odors -
germs and all.

I can't say that I've ever seen anything like that.

Post by Bill Baker
Wouldn't it be easier and more efficient to just smuggle them in condoms
that you swallow?

I'm not sure. What does it taste like?

Post by Bill Baker
Not in real life.

Not really. Besides, some people set up separate accounts and act
differently as a sort of fantasy.

Post by Bill Baker
Yes, I tried abuse first. Some really religious are freaky enough that
they like that sort of thing.

I don't think so. Truly Religious people need compassion, kindness,
honesty
and $upport - not cruel lie's and innuendo's - which are what the
Italians call enema's. Haw! Haw! Haw!

I thought you liked the abuse since you came back for more and kept replying
to me. I figured that if you didn't like it you would stop responding.

Post by Bill Baker
Sorry, you'll have to settle for photos without me in them.

For how long? What's wrong with you? Do you weigh 300 pounds or have
a big mole on your nose? Don't worry about such things. I can love
all kinda people - even blasphemers.

It has nothing to do with my looks.

Post by Bill Baker
Maybe it was a documentary then?

So do you ever deal with the call of the wild then?

Post by Bill Baker
Who says that sex partners can't be real friends?

Oh - they can be - but friend ship amongst your queers tends to
develop after lotsa nasty sex.

Sometimes that's the best way!

Post by Most Holy Mother Tucker
Do you have sex with Southern people? If'n so, you may not a' heard
ever'thing thy talked about. Most queers sex is all about grunts and real
dirty talk.

Only if you're doing it right!

Post by Bill Baker
Actually, I just posted them on the web. I tried your wowmail account
and it just bounced back. Go to http://picasaweb.google.com/euphgeek to
see them.

I'm more interested in taking pictures of other things than I am of myself.
Besides, I don't post pictures of myself online or send them to anyone
unless I know them in real life.

Post by Bill Baker
A lot of unique people like some pretty strange things sexually.

Sexually?!?! We were a talking about my highly skillful Southern
writing.

Yeah, but southern religious types tend to be repressed and then go wild
when they think nobody they know is looking, or at least they fantasize
about it. Kind of like Catholic school girls.

Post by Bill Baker
Or at least you think you are.

I think therefore I am. Ain't you never heard 'at afore?

So if I think you pray to Satan then that must mean you do?

Post by Bill Baker
Even if you think you're completely right.

How can they harm you after you die?

Post by Bill Baker
I'd want to get a follow-up exam by a real medical doctor (i.e., not a
faith healer) first.

And what for? Them pill pushing quack doctors just take alla your
money and do absolutely nothing asida get people hooked on
pharmaceutical poisons.

And how is that different from faith healers taking all of your money and
doing absolutely nothing except for getting people hooked on useless
religion?

Post by Bill Baker
Which doctors do that?

A lot of 'em.

Which ones? You got a reference that says a doctor charged $30K for a shot
that eased pain for 5 minutes?

Post by Most Holy Mother Tucker
Then they try to push you into even more surgery you don't even need. Do
you know how many women are pushed into a having UNNECESSARY Caesarian
sections these days when God designed the birth canal to pop baby's out
just fine? It's all about money. That's why fetus murder was made legal.
Tain't about no whore's "right to choose". She can "choose" to keep her
legs closed if'n she doesn't wanna get knocked up. It's all about quack
doctors a taking money so whores can go on a whoring without no regrets.
God will ANNIHILATE such wicked baby killers.

Do rape and incest victims choose to get knocked up?

Post by Bill Baker
Nah, I'd have to see what you do first.

Just look at a properly circumcised ding-dong and you'll see the
advantages right away. Is your lover boy circumcised? Do you all
ever dock?

I've seen plenty of circumcised men and I never saw any advantage to it.

Post by Bill Baker
If it was serious, why do you make it so funny?

I don't. You just got a sick, warped sensa humor. I think you need
to find an exorcist right now to help you recover your sanity.

I think my sense of humor is just fine. Maybe it's you who can't see the
humor in your over the top, confrontational posts.

--
Hard drive dead?
Bring it back to life with SpinRite!
http://www.grc.com/sr/spinrite.htm

Most Holy Mother Tucker

2010-02-15 05:58:07 UTC

Post by Bill Baker
Ah, you're just trying to butter me up, aren't you?

That wasn't my exact intention. Is that what queers do to get ready
for butt sex? Are you on the top or on the bottom?

Post by Bill Baker
Only two types of people are allowed to be that intimate with me: �Those who
have gone to an accredited medical school and those I have sex with.

Thurgood went to an accredited medical school. You probably want him
to inspect your foreskin on accounta you're all gay and hate women.
Would you let a woman give you a massage or a hair cut or a manicure?

Post by Bill Baker
I'm sure that's one of your external stimuli, huh?

You can call it 'at if'n you wanna. Why are you so distant from
people? What harm could I possibly do to you if'n you sent me a nice
picture? Are you a sex criminal?

Post by Bill Baker
So you're denying you're in denial? �Isn't that being in denial too?

No it ain't. I'm just a refuting your suggestion that I am anything
less than pure.

Post by Bill Baker
Since douche comes from the French word meaning "shower," I guess you could
say that I douche regularly.

But do you use enema's to cleanse your filthy old colon?

Post by Bill Baker
Neither one. �They just didn't think it was necessary.

And they didn't change their minds after the smegma started a piling
up?

Post by Bill Baker
But I would notice it just the same, wouldn't I?

Maybe - but you wouldn't notice it as a foul odor. Do you ever lick
your own sweat?

Post by Bill Baker
I can't say that I've ever seen anything like that.

Don't you watch queer porn?

Post by Bill Baker
I'm not sure. �What does it taste like?

I'm sure I got absolutely no idea. I HEARD it tastes like rotten
cheese. Don't you know?

Post by Bill Baker
Not really. �Besides, some people set up separate accounts and act
differently as a sort of fantasy.

What do they get outa that?

Post by Bill Baker
I thought you liked the abuse since you came back for more and kept replying
to me. �

At first I was a trying to save your soul. Then I was a trying to
save others from a being corrupted by you.

Post by Bill Baker
I figured that if you didn't like it you would stop responding.

God told me to go right on a preaching. Occasionally Cousin Purlean
or Thurgood takes over for me. Dumb Dora seemed to like Brother Buck
and Purlean a little. Do you have a favorite member of Our Holy
Church?

Post by Bill Baker
It has nothing to do with my looks.

What does it have to do with then?

Post by Bill Baker
So do you ever deal with the call of the wild then?

Not in that way. The homo sexuals hear the call of wild demons to the
trough o' perversions!

Post by Bill Baker
Sometimes that's the best way!

Ugh! Weird sex can't be the basis of any serious relationship.

Post by Bill Baker
Only if you're doing it right!

Is 'at the way you do it?

Post by Bill Baker
I'm more interested in taking pictures of other things than I am of myself. �
Besides, I don't post pictures of myself online or send them to anyone
unless I know them in real life.

I think you know me well enough.

Post by Bill Baker
Yeah, but southern

Southern

Post by Bill Baker
religious types tend to be repressed

True Christians like me ain't repressed at all. We're liberated from
sin.

Post by Bill Baker
and then go wild when they think nobody they know is looking,

Do you think I act like 'at? I think you know better'n 'at.

Post by Bill Baker
or at least they fantasize about it. �

The diff'rence is 'at heathens act on their nastiest sex fantasy's.
'At's why there's so much sex down at the gay bars with the cruisy
dark rooms.

Post by Bill Baker
Kind of like Catholic school girls.

Some Catholic school girls have perfectly innocent childhoods. Do you
want ever'body to be all perverted? Did you did or did you didn't
sign the Queer Agenda?

Post by Bill Baker
So if I think you pray to Satan then that must mean you do?

No way! You're a blasphemer with wicked thoughts. I am a True
Christian whose every thought is as pure as the driven snow.

Post by Bill Baker
How can they harm you after you die?

I could inadvertently carry them from one planet to t'other.

Post by Bill Baker
And how is that different from faith healers taking all of your money and
doing absolutely nothing except for getting people hooked on useless
religion?

True Religion ain't never useless. If'n a Faith Healer really takes
money and then doesn't do nothing, well then that's criminal. In Our
Holy Church the Faith Healers really heal the sick. People doesn't
pack the pews down at the First Universal Christian Kingdom jus to
hear me sing - altho' I personally think 'at oughta be reason enough.
They come on accounta we really do heal people's flesh.

Post by Bill Baker
Which ones? �You got a reference that says a doctor charged $30K for a shot
that eased pain for 5 minutes?

Severla people in Our Holy Church has reported story's like 'at. I
will ask for permission to quote them to you. They were A'WAY'S
satisfied by the special and True Healing they got from Thurgood and
me.

Post by Bill Baker
Do rape and incest victims choose to get knocked up?

That's two totally diff'rent category's. If'n a woman gets raped and
she was 1) dressed properly and 2) not a teasing the man what violated
her, she can use the morning after pill. If'n it was really rape, she
needs to act fast - not wait around and think it over. If'n the rape
involves an assault and the victim can't get down to the clinic, we
make allowances. They can have the baby's and the Holy Church will
put 'em up for adoption - or find a decent Christian home for them.
If'n a woman dresses like a whore or eggs a man on and then gets
herself raped - she needs to be shunned. Usually wefind some way to
get her unwanted baby away from her and pit ot in a good home - but we
don't kill it.

Incest is a totally diff'rent story. If'n the woman consented to the
act, why should she be allowed to kill her baby? She needs to deal
with it - even if'n it's born all deformed or crazy. Maybe next time
she'll keep her legs shut when Wild Uncle Willie comes over and gives
her nasty looks.

Post by Bill Baker
I've seen plenty of circumcised men

That totally PROVES you're as queer as a three dollar Bill! Haw!
Haw! Haw!

Post by Bill Baker
and I never saw any advantage to it.

Did you ever put one in your mouth? Don't the uncircumcised one's
taste nasty?

Post by Bill Baker
I think my sense of humor is just fine. �

I don't. Case closed.

Post by Bill Baker
Maybe it's you who can't see the humor in your over the top, confrontational
posts.

I can't see none on accounta there ain't none to see.

I still wanna be your friend -
I got me lotsa queer friends -

Love,

Lurlean

juanjo

2010-02-15 22:28:07 UTC

On Feb 14, 9:58 pm, Mostly Holey Mother Fucker <mother-

God told me to go right on a preaching.

Must have been a false god who told you that. It must have been
Satan. The Bible specifically forbids women from preaching.

Most Holy Mother Tucker

2010-02-16 04:16:37 UTC

Post by juanjo
Mostly Holey

I am HOLY - not holey.

Post by juanjo
Mother F***** <mother-

Your personal geyser in hell just got 20 degree's hotter.
Make that 40 degree's. How can you say such hateful stuff to me when
I'm so good to you.

Post by juanjo
Must have been a false god who told you that. �

It wasn't.

Post by juanjo
It must have been Satan. �

No way. Satan is afearda me.

Post by juanjo
The Bible specifically forbids women from preaching.

Not all women - no. The Apostle Paul told the Corinthian women to
keep their big mouths shut in Church. I'm from Mississippi, not
Corinth - so I am allowed to preach. Paul later wrote to Timothy that
he personally (not God) wouldn't suffer "a woman" to preach or teach -
but that was just his personal view point about Eunice, Timothy's
mother, who obviously wanted more influence in the Holy Church than
what she deserved.

Tell me, Juanjo - is Marco the Sicilian you told us all about here
some time ago? Does he drink a lot? D you happen to wear a bear
medallion arouund your extra thick neck? Do you go to dirty movie
theaters up town? I was just a wondering.

I'll pray for you and your unnatural lust for pork -

Reverend Mother Tucker
God's Holy Hand Maiden

juanjo

2010-02-16 22:51:37 UTC

On Feb 15, 8:16 pm, Mostly Wholey Mother Fucker <mother-

Post by juanjo
Mostly Holey

I am HOLY - not holey.

Nope, you are an arrogant woman [supposedly] who defies the Holy Writ.

Post by juanjo
Mother F***** <mother-

Your personal geyser in hell just got 20 degree's hotter.

delusional again aren't you.

Post by Most Holy Mother Tucker
Make that 40 degree's. How can you say such hateful stuff to me when
I'm so good to you.

I just tell it how I see it.

Post by juanjo
Must have been a false god who told you that.

It wasn't.

How would you know. Satan is the Great Trickster. Jesus told me you
were deluded. Who am I going to believe, Jesus or you, Max?

Post by juanjo
It must have been Satan.

No way. Satan is afearda me.

Afraid you are going to take over.

Post by juanjo
The Bible specifically forbids women from preaching.

That is a very twisted interpretation of scripture. This proves you
are deluded.

Post by Most Holy Mother Tucker
Tell me, Juanjo - is Marco the Sicilian you told us all about here
some time ago?

He is Sicilian.

Post by Most Holy Mother Tucker
Does he drink a lot?

Post by Most Holy Mother Tucker
D you happen to wear a bear
medallion arouund your extra thick neck?

Post by Most Holy Mother Tucker
Do you go to dirty movie
theaters up town? I was just a wondering.

Nope

Post by Most Holy Mother Tucker
I'll pray for you and your unnatural lust for pork -

huh?

Post by Most Holy Mother Tucker
Reverend Mother Fucker
Satan's Wholey Hand Job Maiden

Most Holy Mother Tucker

2010-02-17 03:18:20 UTC

On Feb 16, 2:51�pm, juanjo <***@mindspring.com> wrote:

Mind spring? Your miond went PLOP against the wall a long time ago,
old man.

Post by juanjo
Wholey

HOLY! HOLY! HOLY!!!

Post by juanjo
Mother F***** <mother-

20 MORE degree's o' torment and a counting!
Add 20 MORE flaming degree's of AGGGGONY!

Post by juanjo
Nope, you are an arrogant

No I ain't. What makes you think I'm arrogant? I'm actually totally
humble.

Post by juanjo
woman [supposedly]

Definitely. I'm the mother o' seven children and a counting.

Post by juanjo
who defies the Holy Writ.

I NEVER! I ain't no Corinthian woman. I ain't even no Greek. Paul
didn't preach such restrictions to no Ephesians nor no Colossians nor
no Philippians. He didn't even know about Mississippi - on accounta
if he hadda he'd a' invited women like me to preach in the Holy
Church.

Post by juanjo
delusional again aren't you.

Never. If'n you don't repent and be nice to me you will surely burn
in endless agony's. God protects His Most Faithful Servants.

Post by juanjo
I just tell it how I see it.

Well, I don't never do what 'at ugly word describes. I make love with
my husband - but it ain't what you call it. It's a'most a sacrament.
Call it a mitzvah in the Holy Hebrew Tongue.

Post by juanjo
How would you know. �Satan is the Great Trickster. �

Satan FLEES from my on accounta I'm so holy and pure!

Post by juanjo
Jesus told me you were deluded. �

And you believe illegal immigrants? Tell me - does this "Jesus"
expect you to accept him as your Moshiach?

Post by juanjo
Who am I going to believe, Jesus or you, Max?

I'm Lurlean. If'n you wanna believe the Truth, believe me. I A'WAY'S
tell it exactly like it is.

Post by juanjo
Afraid you are going to take over.

I am a Luminary in the Holy Church - and I squash demons under my
heels. I hope to reclaim the whole world for Christ!

Post by juanjo
That is a very twisted interpretation of scripture. �

No it ain't. That's the CORRECT interpretation. I Corinthians says
"your women" not "all women." II Timothy says "a woman". Who ever
'at woman was, she's long gone now. Besides, the Lord Hisself callt
me to preach directly

Post by juanjo
This proves you are deluded.

It doesn't do no such thing. I am a good woman.

Post by juanjo
He is Sicilian.

Is he your lover boy?

Post by juanjo
No

How much older than him are you? I know how old you are.

Post by juanjo
No

There's somebody in New Sodom what looks something like you who does.
The big, burly and fuzzy had some kinda orgy in town over the long wek
end. Did you join in the revelry? Do you support Marco?

Post by juanjo
Nope

If'n you say so, I'll take your word for same. It WAS you what knew
about the super nasty places down on Sixth Street, though. What kinda
stuff goes on down there?

Post by juanjo
huh?

Lechon and other unclean meats. Do you cook for Marco or vice
versa?

Post by juanjo
Reverend Mother F*****

Add twenty MORE red hot degree's o' PAIN and SHAME.

Post by juanjo
Satan's Wholey Hand Job Maiden

That's disgusting. You're a gonna die of artery goop and go straight
to hell very soon if'n you don't clean up your act.

I'll pray for you -
Please be nice to me!

Reverend Lurlean Tucker
God's TRUE Gospel Witness

Bill Baker

2010-02-16 07:55:42 UTC

On Monday February 15 2010 00:58, Most Holy Mother Tucker <mother-

Post by Bill Baker
Ah, you're just trying to butter me up, aren't you?

That wasn't my exact intention. Is that what queers do to get ready
for butt sex? Are you on the top or on the bottom?

I think different people do it different ways, the same as heterosexuals do.

Post by Bill Baker
Only two types of people are allowed to be that intimate with me: Those
who have gone to an accredited medical school and those I have sex with.

Thurgood went to an accredited medical school.

Well then I'd have to see his MD certificate. I'd also want to know which
hospitals and/or clinics he has practiced medicine in.

Post by Most Holy Mother Tucker
You probably want him to inspect your foreskin on accounta you're all gay
and hate women.

Who said that I was gay? Who said I hate women?

Post by Most Holy Mother Tucker
Would you let a woman give you a massage or a hair cut or a manicure?

I've let women do at least two of those things.

Post by Bill Baker
I'm sure that's one of your external stimuli, huh?

You can call it 'at if'n you wanna. Why are you so distant from
people? What harm could I possibly do to you if'n you sent me a nice
picture? Are you a sex criminal?

It's my policy.

Post by Bill Baker
So you're denying you're in denial? Isn't that being in denial too?

No it ain't. I'm just a refuting your suggestion that I am anything
less than pure.

Well your posts refute your pronouncement of purity.

Post by Bill Baker
Since douche comes from the French word meaning "shower," I guess you
could say that I douche regularly.

But do you use enema's to cleanse your filthy old colon?

I'd rather use friends than enemas!

Post by Bill Baker
Neither one. They just didn't think it was necessary.

And they didn't change their minds after the smegma started a piling
up?

No, because it never started piling up. My brother who is six years younger
than I am wasn't circumcised, either.

Post by Bill Baker
But I would notice it just the same, wouldn't I?

Maybe - but you wouldn't notice it as a foul odor. Do you ever lick
your own sweat?

Sometimes when it's on my upper lip.

Post by Bill Baker
I can't say that I've ever seen anything like that.

Don't you watch queer porn?

When would I have time for that?

Post by Bill Baker
I'm not sure. What does it taste like?

I'm sure I got absolutely no idea. I HEARD it tastes like rotten
cheese. Don't you know?

I thought you knew since you talk about it all the time.

Post by Bill Baker
Not really. Besides, some people set up separate accounts and act
differently as a sort of fantasy.

What do they get outa that?

I wouldn't know. Maybe you can answer that question?

Post by Bill Baker
I thought you liked the abuse since you came back for more and kept
replying to me.

At first I was a trying to save your soul. Then I was a trying to
save others from a being corrupted by you.

That's OK, I prefer corrupting people in person anyway.

Post by Bill Baker
I figured that if you didn't like it you would stop responding.

Oh, you're all funny in your own ways. I could never pick a favorite.

Post by Bill Baker
It has nothing to do with my looks.

What does it have to do with then?

The fact that I don't send my picture to anyone online unless I know them in
real life.

Post by Bill Baker
So do you ever deal with the call of the wild then?

Not in that way. The homo sexuals hear the call of wild demons to the
trough o' perversions!

Sounds yummy!

Post by Bill Baker
Sometimes that's the best way!

Ugh! Weird sex can't be the basis of any serious relationship.

Weird sex is sometimes the best basis of a friendship!

Post by Bill Baker
Only if you're doing it right!

Is 'at the way you do it?

Why, are you looking for pointers?

Post by Bill Baker
I'm more interested in taking pictures of other things than I am of
myself. Besides, I don't post pictures of myself online or send them to
anyone unless I know them in real life.

I think you know me well enough.

But not in real life.

Post by Bill Baker
Yeah, but southern

Southern

Yes, southern.

Post by Bill Baker
religious types tend to be repressed

True Christians like me ain't repressed at all. We're liberated from
sin.

People who make statements like that are especially repressed.

Post by Bill Baker
and then go wild when they think nobody they know is looking,

Do you think I act like 'at? I think you know better'n 'at.

No, not really. I have no idea what you do in private. But I can certainly
guess by the way you act here!

Post by Bill Baker
or at least they fantasize about it.

The diff'rence is 'at heathens act on their nastiest sex fantasy's.
'At's why there's so much sex down at the gay bars with the cruisy
dark rooms.

That's why they're not repressed. I'm sure that if they didn't, they'd
probably be bothering people online just like you.

Post by Bill Baker
Kind of like Catholic school girls.

Some Catholic school girls have perfectly innocent childhoods.

Yes, and then they become teenagers.

Post by Most Holy Mother Tucker
Do you want ever'body to be all perverted?

It might make it a much nicer world to live in, that's for sure!

Post by Most Holy Mother Tucker
Did you did or did you didn't sign the Queer Agenda?

How do you think I got my iPod? And I recently got a brand new 22" HD
monitor for my computer! How else could I have gotten those things?

Post by Bill Baker
So if I think you pray to Satan then that must mean you do?

No way! You're a blasphemer with wicked thoughts. I am a True
Christian whose every thought is as pure as the driven snow.

We could use a lot less of the driven snow here in the Midwest!

Post by Bill Baker
How can they harm you after you die?

I could inadvertently carry them from one planet to t'other.

But if you do, wouldn't that be God's will anyway?

Post by Bill Baker
And how is that different from faith healers taking all of your money and
doing absolutely nothing except for getting people hooked on useless
religion?

True Religion ain't never useless. If'n a Faith Healer really takes
money and then doesn't do nothing, well then that's criminal.

So all faith healers are criminals. Gotcha.

Post by Most Holy Mother Tucker
In Our Holy Church the Faith Healers really heal the sick. People doesn't
pack the pews down at the First Universal Christian Kingdom jus to
hear me sing - altho' I personally think 'at oughta be reason enough.
They come on accounta we really do heal people's flesh.

So let me or a proxy video tape your services so that I can see that this is
true for myself.

Post by Bill Baker
Which ones? You got a reference that says a doctor charged $30K for a
shot that eased pain for 5 minutes?

No, I want a real newspaper story that can be verified, not just hearsay.

Post by Bill Baker
Do rape and incest victims choose to get knocked up?

That's two totally diff'rent category's. If'n a woman gets raped and
she was 1) dressed properly and 2) not a teasing the man what violated
her, she can use the morning after pill.

So you don't mind the abortion pill?

Post by Most Holy Mother Tucker
If'n it was really rape, she needs to act fast - not wait around and think
it over. If'n the rape involves an assault and the victim can't get down
to the clinic, we make allowances. They can have the baby's and the Holy
Church will put 'em up for adoption - or find a decent Christian home for
them.

But what if she's too far away from your church? Or the church that she's
near has too many babies already and can't take any more? Even your church
might get overwhelmed if too many women used you for adoption services
rather than getting an abortion.

Post by Most Holy Mother Tucker
If'n a woman dresses like a whore or eggs a man on and then gets
herself raped - she needs to be shunned. Usually wefind some way to
get her unwanted baby away from her and pit ot in a good home - but we
don't kill it.
Incest is a totally diff'rent story. If'n the woman consented to the
act, why should she be allowed to kill her baby?

What if it's a young girl who has been raped by her father most of her life?

Post by Most Holy Mother Tucker
She needs to deal with it - even if'n it's born all deformed or crazy.
Maybe next time she'll keep her legs shut when Wild Uncle Willie comes
over and gives her nasty looks.

And what if she gets beaten when she refuses?

Post by Bill Baker
I've seen plenty of circumcised men

That totally PROVES you're as queer as a three dollar Bill! Haw!
Haw! Haw!

Does it? You've never heard of high school gym class?

Post by Bill Baker
and I never saw any advantage to it.

Did you ever put one in your mouth? Don't the uncircumcised one's
taste nasty?

I suppose it would depend on if they keep it clean or not.

Post by Bill Baker
I think my sense of humor is just fine.

I don't. Case closed.

But I do. Case closed.

Post by Bill Baker
Maybe it's you who can't see the humor in your over the top,
confrontational posts.

I can't see none on accounta there ain't none to see.

Or you just don't want to see it.

--
Hard drive dead?
Bring it back to life with SpinRite!
http://www.grc.com/sr/spinrite.htm

Most Holy Mother Tucker

2010-02-18 04:45:31 UTC

Post by Bill Baker
I think different people do it different ways, the same as heterosexuals do.

Most sexually normal people - which you call hetero sexuals - don't do
it in the butt like the queers. I'm well aware that since the Queer
Sex Revolution, many of 'em does - but they're all wicked and lustful
people what's been influenced by the Satanical queer agenda. How come
you don't wanna tell me what position you play in bed, Bill? In alla
the queer "personal" ads, they a'ways' tell whether they're a top or a
bottom. Do you do both?!?!

Post by Bill Baker
Well then I'd have to see his MD certificate. I'd also want to know which
hospitals and/or clinics he has practiced medicine in.

I think he did his residency on a psycho ward somewheres in
Tennessee. I'llhave to ask. he problem is, he'll wanna circumcise
you. i only wanna look. I'll even settle for a nice detailed
picture.

Post by Bill Baker
Who said that I was gay?

You ain't said it to me - but you sure do imply it a lot. Why is your
sexual (dis)orientation such a secret? I thought your kind was all
"out and proud." Old Max belongs to a "gay friendly" group at his
job. I would be totally ashamed in his place.

Post by Bill Baker
Who said I hate women?

You may or may not. Queers usually either hate women or wanna be
women.

Post by Bill Baker
I've let women do at least two of those things.

Did you ever have a girl friend? Did you ever go alla the way with
her?

Post by Bill Baker
It's my policy.

Why don't you change it just for me? I'm a nice girl. You know you
can trust me.

Post by Bill Baker
Well your posts refute your pronouncement of purity.

How so? I think every single word of 'em SHOUTS OUT purity, goodness
and kindness. Why don't you? The queers I'm friends with over on
Facebook a'way's tell me I'm more compassionate than all the other
True Christians.

Post by Bill Baker
I'd rather use friends than enemas!

Do they use their TONGUES?!?!

Post by Bill Baker
No, because it never started piling up.

I'll have to see that to believe it.

Post by Bill Baker
My brother who is six years younger than I am wasn't circumcised, either.

I feel sorry for him. Did he get circumcised when he grew up? Have
you seen his foreskin before? Did you ever touch it?

Post by Bill Baker
Sometimes when it's on my upper lip.

Do you ever lick your own arm pits?

Post by Bill Baker
When would I have time for that?

Before you go to bed - or maybe AFTER you're in your bed. Haw! Haw!
Haw!

Post by Bill Baker
I thought you knew since you talk about it all the time.

I only what the queers tell me.

Post by Bill Baker
I wouldn't know. Maybe you can answer that question?

Well, I certainly can't speak from experience on acoounta I personally
wouldn't never do nothing like a't myself - but I do got a coupla
idea's. Imagine if'n you had relatives or a boss or a good friend
what was REAL religious - kinda like me. Then imagine 'at you wasn't
so religious yourself - which you ain't since you blasphemed the Holy
Ghost AND Saint Mary many a time. A having two (or more) online
personality's can let you be yourself AND keep your job, your
inheritance and your church going friends who may just happen to hate
the queers. Does 'at make sense to you now? If'n so, how about you
send me a hundred dollars so's I can buy myself a new purse?

Post by Bill Baker
That's OK, I prefer corrupting people in person anyway.

Do you corrupt their souls, their minds or their body's? Do you use
your mouth or your fingers?

Post by Bill Baker
Oh, you're all funny in your own ways. I could never pick a favorite.

Then why not send us all a hundred dollars. Each.

Post by Bill Baker
The fact that I don't send my picture to anyone online unless I know them in
real life.

Do you mean "know" in the Biblical sense.

Post by Bill Baker
Sounds yummy!

Are you into pee fantasy's?

Post by Bill Baker
Weird sex is sometimes the best basis of a friendship!

For queers and other sex deviants maybe.

Post by Bill Baker
Why, are you looking for pointers?

No. I got alla the pointers I need from Thurgood.

Post by Bill Baker
But not in real life.

Who's to say what's real and what ain't? Don't you think I'm real?

Post by Bill Baker
Yes, southern.

No. Southern.

Post by Bill Baker
People who make statements like that are especially repressed.

I definitely ain't repressed about nothing.

Post by Bill Baker
No, not really. I have no idea what you do in private. But I can certainly
guess by the way you act here!

What do you "guess" then? I take care o' my husband and my baby's and
I preach on line. What else do you think I do? Order dirty movie's
in plain brown wrappers and then ask the Fed Ex man to help me play
'em in my BluRay player?

Post by Bill Baker
That's why they're not repressed. I'm sure that if they didn't, they'd
probably be bothering people online just like you.

And exactly who do I bother? Anybody what wants to ignore me can. I
preach in a public space and actually help people find Jesus. I can't
tell you how many queers have broke down and repented in response to
my True Gospel preaching here.

Post by Bill Baker
Yes, and then they become teenagers.

Do you have the lowest possible opinion of ALL religious people?

Post by Bill Baker
It might make it a much nicer world to live in, that's for sure!

Do you have sex with someone or other ever' day?

Post by Bill Baker
How do you think I got my iPod? And I recently got a brand new 22" HD
monitor for my computer! How else could I have gotten those things?

You could be a hustler?

Post by Bill Baker
We could use a lot less of the driven snow here in the Midwest!

Where exactly do you live, friend? You know you can trust me with the
Truth.

Post by Bill Baker
But if you do, wouldn't that be God's will anyway?

Probably - but I don't want people to die or horrible viral infections
- not even queers what goes to bare backing orgy's every nighta the
week.

Post by Bill Baker
So all faith healers are criminals. Gotcha.

Oh no! Thurgood and me's the real thing! I can heal third degree
burns with my bare hands. Thurgood helps the blind see and the deaf
hear ever' week.

Post by Bill Baker
So let me or a proxy video tape your services so that I can see that this is
true for myself.

Get circumcised and join the Holy Church. Then we'll at least let you
in the door - but a being a blasphemer you can't sit down with the
rest of us True Christians - and you can't video tape nothing. You
will be strip searched at the door.

Post by Bill Baker
No, I want a real newspaper story that can be verified, not just hearsay.

Subscribe to the "Kingdom Come!" then and you'll see plenty.

Post by Bill Baker
So you don't mind the abortion pill?

Not the RU486 pill - but the hormone cocktail they give rape victims
as soon as possible after they're violated.

Post by Bill Baker
But what if she's too far away from your church?

There's doctors what can prescribe morning after pills else wheres.

Post by Bill Baker
Or the church that she's near has too many babies already and can't take any
more?

That ain't happened yet. We'll cross 'at bridge when we get to it.

Post by Bill Baker
Even your church might get overwhelmed if too many women used you for
adoption services rather than getting an abortion.

Then we'll just open more Churches, won't we? You can help by a
making a nice big generous conribution in Jesus' name.

That counts as rape - not incest. She can have a morning after pill.
Did I did or did I didn't write "If'n the woman CONSENTED to the act,
why should she be allowed to kill her baby?"

Post by Bill Baker
And what if she gets beaten when she refuses?

She can defend herself. We recommend that women about to get raped
kick their attackers real hard in the nuts. Most incest is consentual
bother/sister or kissin' cousin LUST. If'n sex from them kinda
pairings leads to pregnancy, so be it. No morning after pill for no
whores nor no cheap sluts.

Post by Bill Baker
Does it? You've never heard of high school gym class?

Yes - but most men your age are properly circumcised - at least in the
United States.

Post by Bill Baker
I suppose it would depend on if they keep it clean or not.

Most of 'em doesn't, HUH? Do you play with the ding-dongs before you
put 'em in your mouth or just dive?

Post by Bill Baker
But I do. Case closed.

The case was a'ready closed by me when you tried to re-open it. Your
sensa humor is WARPED!

Post by Bill Baker
Or you just don't want to see it.

I know it ain't there to see!

Jesus saves perverts and weirdo's ever' day!

Reverend Mother Tucker
Spokes Woman for Christ

Bill Baker

2010-02-18 07:58:16 UTC

On Wednesday February 17 2010 23:45, Most Holy Mother Tucker <mother-

Post by Bill Baker
I think different people do it different ways, the same as heterosexuals do.

Top, bottom, sideways, inside out and upside down. Why limit it to just two
positions?

Post by Bill Baker
Well then I'd have to see his MD certificate. I'd also want to know
which hospitals and/or clinics he has practiced medicine in.

I think he did his residency on a psycho ward somewheres in
Tennessee. I'llhave to ask. he problem is, he'll wanna circumcise
you. i only wanna look. I'll even settle for a nice detailed
picture.

He may want to, but he won't get to.

Post by Bill Baker
Who said that I was gay?

What exactly is "my kind?" How would you know what my kind is if you don't
know for sure what my sexual orientation is?

Post by Bill Baker
Who said I hate women?

You may or may not. Queers usually either hate women or wanna be
women.

Nope. I know several gay men with female friends. Some even count women as
their best friends.

Post by Bill Baker
I've let women do at least two of those things.

Did you ever have a girl friend? Did you ever go alla the way with
her?

Alla? Is that an alternate spelling for Allah? Since when did you convert
to Islam?

Post by Bill Baker
It's my policy.

Why don't you change it just for me? I'm a nice girl. You know you
can trust me.

No I don't, because I've never met you in real life.

Post by Bill Baker
Well your posts refute your pronouncement of purity.

Are you sure they're not just saying it sarcastically?

Post by Bill Baker
I'd rather use friends than enemas!

Do they use their TONGUES?!?!

They use whatever they want to use.

Post by Bill Baker
No, because it never started piling up.

I'll have to see that to believe it.

Well, let me know when you invent time travel and you can.

Post by Bill Baker
My brother who is six years younger than I am wasn't circumcised, either.

I feel sorry for him. Did he get circumcised when he grew up? Have
you seen his foreskin before? Did you ever touch it?

In order, no, yes and no.

Post by Bill Baker
Sometimes when it's on my upper lip.

Do you ever lick your own arm pits?

Now that would be kind of difficult, don't you think? Kind of like putting
your elbows in your ears?

Post by Bill Baker
When would I have time for that?

Before you go to bed - or maybe AFTER you're in your bed. Haw! Haw!
Haw!

What point would there be after I'm in bed? I would just be able to watch
my own live porno then.

Post by Bill Baker
I thought you knew since you talk about it all the time.

I only what the queers tell me.

So then you have your answer.

Post by Bill Baker
I wouldn't know. Maybe you can answer that question?

Well, I certainly can't speak from experience on acoounta I personally
wouldn't never do nothing like a't myself

<Chortle> Sure you wouldn't.

Post by Most Holy Mother Tucker
- but I do got a coupla idea's. Imagine if'n you had relatives or a boss
or a good friend what was REAL religious - kinda like me. Then imagine
'at you wasn't so religious yourself - which you ain't since you
blasphemed the Holy Ghost AND Saint Mary many a time. A having two (or
more) online personality's can let you be yourself AND keep your job, your
inheritance and your church going friends who may just happen to hate
the queers. Does 'at make sense to you now? If'n so, how about you
send me a hundred dollars so's I can buy myself a new purse?

Oh, have you changed your mind about allowing my video camera into your
church?

Post by Bill Baker
That's OK, I prefer corrupting people in person anyway.

Do you corrupt their souls, their minds or their body's?

What do you mean, "or?" I find it the most fun to do all three at once!

Post by Most Holy Mother Tucker
Do you use your mouth or your fingers?

Any bodily appendage that's available and the most convenient.

Post by Bill Baker
Oh, you're all funny in your own ways. I could never pick a favorite.

Then why not send us all a hundred dollars. Each.

Well, I can't afford that, but as soon as my video from your church comes
in, I'll try to send as much as I can.

Post by Bill Baker
The fact that I don't send my picture to anyone online unless I know them
in real life.

Do you mean "know" in the Biblical sense.

Given that I send my pictures to members of my family, that would be a bit
disgusting, given that I don't live in the Deep South.

Post by Bill Baker
Sounds yummy!

Are you into pee fantasy's?

Yes, and Q, R, S and T fantasies as well!

Post by Bill Baker
Weird sex is sometimes the best basis of a friendship!

For queers and other sex deviants maybe.

See how much fun it can be to be a queer or a sex deviant?

Post by Bill Baker
Why, are you looking for pointers?

No. I got alla the pointers I need from Thurgood.

Is it really a "pointer" or is it more of a "pinky?"

Post by Bill Baker
But not in real life.

Who's to say what's real and what ain't? Don't you think I'm real?

Maybe. I still haven't seen any proof that you're not a character made up
by Max Varazslo.

Post by Bill Baker
Yes, southern.

No. Southern.

That's what I said, southern.

Post by Bill Baker
People who make statements like that are especially repressed.

I definitely ain't repressed about nothing.

Repressed people often deny it.

Post by Bill Baker
No, not really. I have no idea what you do in private. But I can
certainly guess by the way you act here!

At the very least!

Post by Bill Baker
That's why they're not repressed. I'm sure that if they didn't, they'd
probably be bothering people online just like you.

I can't tell you either, since you have no proof that they did that.

Post by Bill Baker
Yes, and then they become teenagers.

Do you have the lowest possible opinion of ALL religious people?

Oh, don't take it personally. I just have fun pointing out religious
hypocrisy.

Post by Bill Baker
It might make it a much nicer world to live in, that's for sure!

Do you have sex with someone or other ever' day?

I wish!

Post by Bill Baker
How do you think I got my iPod? And I recently got a brand new 22" HD
monitor for my computer! How else could I have gotten those things?

You could be a hustler?

Is that the only other way?

Post by Bill Baker
We could use a lot less of the driven snow here in the Midwest!

Where exactly do you live, friend? You know you can trust me with the
Truth.

In the Midwest. Midwest, U.S.A.

Post by Bill Baker
But if you do, wouldn't that be God's will anyway?

Probably - but I don't want people to die or horrible viral infections
- not even queers what goes to bare backing orgy's every nighta the
week.

So you would defy God's will after you die? Aren't you worried that he
would kick you out of heaven and send you to Venus?

Post by Bill Baker
So all faith healers are criminals. Gotcha.

Oh no! Thurgood and me's the real thing! I can heal third degree
burns with my bare hands. Thurgood helps the blind see and the deaf
hear ever' week.

Have those people been examined by secular doctors before and after? I'd
like to see proof.

Post by Bill Baker
So let me or a proxy video tape your services so that I can see that this
is true for myself.

Then sorry, no deal.

Post by Bill Baker
No, I want a real newspaper story that can be verified, not just hearsay.

Subscribe to the "Kingdom Come!" then and you'll see plenty.

That's hearsay.

Post by Bill Baker
So you don't mind the abortion pill?

Not the RU486 pill - but the hormone cocktail they give rape victims
as soon as possible after they're violated.

Post by Bill Baker
But what if she's too far away from your church?

There's doctors what can prescribe morning after pills else wheres.

What if the morning after pill fails? What if for some legitimate reason
she's not able to take the pill?

Post by Bill Baker
Or the church that she's near has too many babies already and can't take
any more?

That ain't happened yet. We'll cross 'at bridge when we get to it.

Post by Bill Baker
Even your church might get overwhelmed if too many women used you for
adoption services rather than getting an abortion.

Then we'll just open more Churches, won't we? You can help by a
making a nice big generous conribution in Jesus' name.

As soon as I get that video from your church service.

Post by Most Holy Mother Tucker
That counts as rape - not incest. She can have a morning after pill.
Did I did or did I didn't write "If'n the woman CONSENTED to the act,
why should she be allowed to kill her baby?"

Well then how do you expect the abortion doctors to make a living then?

Post by Bill Baker
And what if she gets beaten when she refuses?

She can defend herself. We recommend that women about to get raped
kick their attackers real hard in the nuts.

If that worked, there wouldn't be as much rape.

Post by Most Holy Mother Tucker
Most incest is consentual bother/sister or kissin' cousin LUST. If'n sex
from them kinda pairings leads to pregnancy, so be it. No morning after
pill for no whores nor no cheap sluts.

Why not? If it's not abortion, why shouldn't they get the morning after
pill?

Post by Bill Baker
Does it? You've never heard of high school gym class?

Yes - but most men your age are properly circumcised - at least in the
United States.

Yes, and that's how I would be able to see circumcised penises without
necessarily being gay.

Post by Bill Baker
I suppose it would depend on if they keep it clean or not.

Most of 'em doesn't, HUH?

It probably depends on how they were raised.

Post by Most Holy Mother Tucker
Do you play with the ding-dongs before you put 'em in your mouth or just
dive?

Only people who don't care about romance just dive. And only playing with
the ding-dong is just gauche. There are plenty of other parts of the body
worth playing with.

Post by Bill Baker
But I do. Case closed.

The case was a'ready closed by me when you tried to re-open it. Your
sensa humor is WARPED!

I don't recall ever agreeing to your rules about closing cases.

Post by Bill Baker
Or you just don't want to see it.

I know it ain't there to see!

If there's someone who finds it humorous (me) then the humor must be there.

Post by Most Holy Mother Tucker
Jesus saves perverts and weirdo's ever' day!
Reverend Mother Tucker
Spokes Woman for Christ

Like bicycle spokes?

--
Hard drive dead?
Bring it back to life with SpinRite!
http://www.grc.com/sr/spinrite.htm

Most Holy Mother Tucker

2010-02-19 03:42:46 UTC

Top, bottom, sideways, inside out and upside down. �Why limit it to just two positions?

Go ask t'other queers - not me. There was book onced callt "Tops,
Bottoms and Side Pockets". I think it had something to do with the
queer handkerchief code. Which handkerchief color do you wear - and
in which pocket, Bill? Or do you wrap yourself up in rain bow's like
a real tutti frutti faggot?

He may want to, but he won't get to.

Why is your foreskin so important to you? What does it do for you but
make your little ding-a-ling stink? Don't you think it would look
better on Thurgood's trophy wall than down betwixt your legs?

What exactly is "my kind?" �

Sex deviants what's been influenced by the Queer Agenda even if'n you
ain't turnt completely queer yourself. I personally think you have,
though. The stuff you write is just so "gay".

How would you know what my kind is if you don't
know for sure what my sexual orientation is?

Perverts are perverts no matter who they screw around with.

Nope. �

Yep, Bill. If'n I say something it's automatically True. That's a
blessing what comes from a being sanctified by God.

I know several gay men with female friends. �Some even count women as
their best friends.

Them's the one's what secretly wants to be women.

Alla? �Is that an alternate spelling for Allah? �

No. I know how to spell. I'm just so busy a taking care o' my baby's
when I preach 'at I don't a'ways type right. However - "alla" is
perfect Mississippi Country English for "all of".

Since when did you convert to Islam?

You know better'n 'at. Islam is devil worship. I serve only the Lord
Jesus.

No I don't, because I've never met you in real life.

You won't come out to New Sodom and glimpse my glory. There's planes
a landing ever' day - not to mention two major bridges astride the Bay
o' Sex Pigs. I'm sure you'd love Castro Street. Were you ever there
afore? Did you go to the Bad Lands or the Moby Dick?

Are you sure they're not just saying it sarcastically?

Yes. They ain't. Alla t'others just sling crude language. I offer
cogent arguments straight (!) from the Holy Scriotures that prove 'at
the Lord Jesus preached against the gross evils of fornication. There
was a long debate over there about men what takes hard ding-dongs up
the "poo hole". I thought that discussion was totally childish - so I
introduced the more proper term "rectum rippers".

They use whatever they want to use.

Oh - so you just let them have at your most private parts, HUH? Did
you ever have any herpes?

Well, let me know when you invent time travel and you can.

God lets me travel thru time sometimes - to see how good my daddy or
his mama were way back when. I don't see no purpose in a turning back
time just to see chunks o' smegma.

In order, no, yes and no.

Did you wanna touch it? I a'way's wondered about queer men and
incest. We all know they burn in lust for practically any ding-a-ling
what's hard and can shoot spooge. There's a'so a lotta brothers and
even twins what get it on together in queer porn. How common would
you say queer incest is?

Now that would be kind of difficult, don't you think? �Kind of like putting
your elbows in your ears?

No. Queer men do it ever' day. Did you ever lick out any other man's
arm pits? 'At's a big fetish amongst the queers.

What point would there be after I'm in bed? �I would just be able to watch
my own live porno then.

Maybe so. Do you go to bed with a diff'rent man ever' night? Do you
keep the lights on so's you can see ever'thing in detail? Do you
rim???

So then you have your answer.

But you know how much the queers lies!

<Chortle> Sure you wouldn't.

Chortle all's you wanna. You KNOW I a'way's speak the Truth.

Oh, have you changed your mind about allowing my video camera into your
church?

No way! If'n you ain't familiar with the following TV play, I suggest
you try to watch it. It has a character nama Max that clasrifies the
True Relationship between me and 'at old white Jew whose name you keep
invoking to me. Looky here...

http://www.imdb.com/video/hulu/vi713294617/

What do you mean, "or?" �I find it the most fun to do all three at once!

What kinda diseases do you infect them with? Or are you a talking
about stretching out their nasty butt holes so's you can stick stuff
up there?

Any bodily appendage that's available and the most convenient.

So you do rim, HUH? I just knew it!

Well, I can't afford that, but as soon as my video from your church comes
in, I'll try to send as much as I can.

We may be able to send you a copy o' what we broad cast on Public
Access TV. But where do I send it? Will you give me the PO Box you
use to connect with tricks thru "The Advocate" or Squirt.org(y)?

Given that I send my pictures to members of my family, that would be a bit
disgusting, given that I don't live in the Deep South.

God HATES it when you insult the Deep South. We don't NEVER Commit no
kinda incest in Mississippi.

Yes, and Q, R, S and T fantasies as well!

I mean URINATION. There's queers in this town what has pee pee
party's. Men lay in metal tubs and others take turns a peeing on
them. Said pee may be swallered too. Then they usually shoot their
nasty diseased spooge over the "bottoms" - 'til some kinda stinky
froth builds up. Then they may swap places. Do you get into that?
Lotsa queers uses this come on line at certain o' your gay bars around
here - "Will you piss on me?" I can use 'at word on accounta it's in
the King James Bible.

See how much fun it can be to be a queer or a sex deviant?

But it's dangerous. Doesn't alla that promiscuous sex play havoc with
your emotions?

Is it really a "pointer" or is it more of a "pinky?"

Why does your dirty mind wanna know? In Thurgood's case it's more
like a base ball bat - if'n you absolutely must now- and not the
corked kind neither.

Maybe. �I still haven't seen any proof that you're not a character made up
by Max Varazslo.

How well do you know him? What makes you think he's real? Did you
real the news paper article a circulating around here that proves he's
an activist for queer issue's? You should see his stuff on MySpace -
"Yes, I support gay [SHAM] marriage", "Yes - I believe gay couples
should be allowed to adopt children", "Yes - I believe gays and
lesbians should be allowed to teach children in the public schools -
where there shouldn't be any compulsory prayer". I thought he was
right up your alley - or maybe you up HIS. Haw! Haw! Haw! Did you
ever sleep with this man? Would you believe it if'n I told you he's
my biological father?

That's what I said, southern.

God wants you to capitalize proper nouns what refers to Godly regions
o' His Country.

Repressed people often deny it.

I ain't repressed not in no kinda denial. I am pure!

At the very least!

Gross. Those are queer fantasy's. Why don't you just admit you're
queer? Are you on Twitter or MySpace, Bill?

I can't tell you either, since you have no proof that they did that.

I do. I can tell a homo from a True Christian any day. Remember -
Thurgood and me saw thru Rufus and Burn-a-dykde Strangelust.

Oh, don't take it personally. �I just have fun pointing out religious
hypocrisy.

So do I - but you won't find NUNNA that in Our Holy Church.

I wish!

So you advocate care free sexual promiscuity then? Did you ever get
it on with a stranger at the gym???

Is that the only other way?

No. You coulda earned the money. Queers often get their money thru
shady means though, so I'm naturally suspicious of your kind.

In the Midwest. �Midwest, U.S.A.

That cover a wole lotta territory. Are you in Madison, Wisconsin?

So you would defy God's will after you die? �Aren't you worried that he
would kick you out of heaven and send you to Venus?

Not one bit. My mansion is insured against fire. I just don't wanna
do nothing improper for a Child o' God.

Have those people been examined by secular doctors before and after? �I'd
like to see proof.

Go ask them. Usually they swear off the secula quacks after they've
been healed by us - although they don't necessarily have to. They
just gotta pay for their own treatment outa pocket. That usually
keeps 'em far away from the pill pushng Big Pharma drones.

Then sorry, no deal.

You know you wanna. Is your foreskin extra long or short? You might
not even miss it none?

That's hearsay.

Oh no! It's the unvarnished Truth!

What if the morning after pill fails? �

Then it's God's Will 'at she have 'at baby.

What if for some legitimate reason she's not able to take the pill?

The case can be pesentedto Our Holy Church's Religious Court for
review. Usually the woman is expected to have the baby, though there
can be some exceptions.

As soon as I get that video from your church service.

We refuse to cast our precious pearls afore uncircumcised swine.
Doesn't 'at foreskin o' your'n feel like excess baggage a flopping
around down there?

Well then how do you expect the abortion doctors to make a living then?

They need to find something else to do - such as SAVE lives and not
snuff 'em out with suction pumps and human fetus scrapers. They'll
burn in hell for all's they done any way's.

If that worked, there wouldn't be as much rape.

True Christians are very seldom raped. We must be a doing something
right, HUH?

Why not? �If it's not abortion, why shouldn't they get the morning after
pill?

They're a playing games with God's Sacred Reproductive vessels and
need to suffer for it. Why can't they use rubbers? It ain't like ads
for them tings ain't broadcast from every TV tower in the country all
day long.

Yes, and that's how I would be able to see circumcised penises without
necessarily being gay.

Did you ever touch wunna them circumcised weenie's? Did the properly
circumcised boy's make funna you and your old elephant's trunk? Does
it hang way down and bump into stuff? I can just imagine what zippers
do to foreskins. Ouch!!!

It probably depends on how they were raised.

Most people today are brung up to be lazy. That's why most foreskins
are packed with smegma.

Only people who don't care about romance just dive. �

Queers can't love - so mosta them just dive.

And only playing with the ding-dong is just gauche. �There are plenty of other parts of the body
worth playing with.

Such as the butt hole, HUH? What does that taste like?

I don't recall ever agreeing to your rules about closing cases.

You don't have to agree. I make alla the rules on my Holy Gospel
threads.

If there's someone who finds it humorous (me) then the humor must be there.

It may be "there" in your mind. You let your dirty imagination run
wild with you.

Like bicycle spokes?

No - like a speaking God's Word to uncircumcised heathen blasphemers.

Deep in prayer ever' day!

Reverend Mother Tucker
Spokes Woman for Christ

Bill Baker

2010-02-19 08:58:57 UTC

On Thursday February 18 2010 22:42, Most Holy Mother Tucker <mother-

Post by Bill Baker
Top, bottom, sideways, inside out and upside down. Why limit it to just
two positions?

I only wear rainbow clothes when I go into churches who preach that
homosexuality is sinful. I like to see the looks on their faces, especially
if I'm wearing women's clothes!

Post by Bill Baker
He may want to, but he won't get to.

Why is your foreskin so important to you? What does it do for you but
make your little ding-a-ling stink? Don't you think it would look
better on Thurgood's trophy wall than down betwixt your legs?

Now that's really perverted to have some sort of trophy wall for foreskins.
Not that I'm surprised or anything.

Post by Bill Baker
What exactly is "my kind?"

Sex deviants what's been influenced by the Queer Agenda even if'n you
ain't turnt completely queer yourself. I personally think you have,
though. The stuff you write is just so "gay".

Is it? I could certainly say the same about what you write. Some of it
just doesn't compare to the perversion I've heard from some of my gay
friends. I'll mention something you wrote and they'll look at me with a
confused look and ask me where I heard that from.

Post by Bill Baker
How would you know what my kind is if you don't
know for sure what my sexual orientation is?

Perverts are perverts no matter who they screw around with.

Well that much is true, I suppose. I'm proud to be called a pervert!

Post by Bill Baker
Nope.

Yep, Bill. If'n I say something it's automatically True. That's a
blessing what comes from a being sanctified by God.

Then that must prove that you worship Satan, because what you wrote just
wasn't true.

Post by Bill Baker
I know several gay men with female friends. Some even count women as
their best friends.

Them's the one's what secretly wants to be women.

So you admit that some gay men don't hate women.

Post by Bill Baker
Alla? Is that an alternate spelling for Allah?

No. I know how to spell. I'm just so busy a taking care o' my baby's
when I preach 'at I don't a'ways type right. However - "alla" is
perfect Mississippi Country English for "all of".

I didn't know that everyone in Mississippi worshiped Allah!

Post by Bill Baker
Since when did you convert to Islam?

You know better'n 'at. Islam is devil worship. I serve only the Lord
Jesus.

But you proved above that you worship Satan by being wrong on something.

Post by Bill Baker
No I don't, because I've never met you in real life.

You won't come out to New Sodom and glimpse my glory.

Pervert! Now you're coming on to me!

Post by Most Holy Mother Tucker
There's planes a landing ever' day - not to mention two major bridges
astride the Bay o' Sex Pigs. I'm sure you'd love Castro Street. Were you
ever there afore? Did you go to the Bad Lands or the Moby Dick?

I've actually never been out farther west than Kansas. And that was only to
see some relatives.

Post by Bill Baker
Are you sure they're not just saying it sarcastically?

I believe that one is directly from the Queen's English, isn't it?

Post by Bill Baker
They use whatever they want to use.

Oh - so you just let them have at your most private parts, HUH? Did
you ever have any herpes?

No, I didn't even have any hispes! Haw! Haw! Haw!

Post by Bill Baker
Well, let me know when you invent time travel and you can.

God lets me travel thru time sometimes - to see how good my daddy or
his mama were way back when. I don't see no purpose in a turning back
time just to see chunks o' smegma.

Why not? You seem to be genuinely interested in them.

Post by Bill Baker
In order, no, yes and no.

I'd say it's a lot more common in the Deep South.

Post by Bill Baker
Now that would be kind of difficult, don't you think? Kind of like
putting your elbows in your ears?

No. Queer men do it ever' day. Did you ever lick out any other man's
arm pits? 'At's a big fetish amongst the queers.

Eh, not my thing really.

Post by Bill Baker
What point would there be after I'm in bed? I would just be able to
watch my own live porno then.

Maybe so. Do you go to bed with a diff'rent man ever' night? Do you
keep the lights on so's you can see ever'thing in detail? Do you
rim???

Who wouldn't keep the light on? You get to see some of the best things
then!

Post by Bill Baker
So then you have your answer.

But you know how much the queers lies!

Don't you think I'm queer? If so why are you asking me if you think I'm
just going to lie?

Post by Bill Baker
<Chortle> Sure you wouldn't.

Chortle all's you wanna. You KNOW I a'way's speak the Truth.

I usually do a lot of chortling when I read your posts.

Post by Bill Baker
Oh, have you changed your mind about allowing my video camera into your
church?

So is Max the ventriloquist and you're the lonely woman? Or are you the
ventriloquist's dummy?

Post by Bill Baker
What do you mean, "or?" I find it the most fun to do all three at once!

What kinda diseases do you infect them with? Or are you a talking
about stretching out their nasty butt holes so's you can stick stuff
up there?

Whichever they prefer.

Post by Bill Baker
Any bodily appendage that's available and the most convenient.

So you do rim, HUH? I just knew it!

If you say so.

Post by Bill Baker
Well, I can't afford that, but as soon as my video from your church comes
in, I'll try to send as much as I can.

We may be able to send you a copy o' what we broad cast on Public
Access TV. But where do I send it? Will you give me the PO Box you
use to connect with tricks thru "The Advocate" or Squirt.org(y)?

Nah, I want an independent video taken by someone not from your church. And
who says I have a PO Box? Why would I need to be anonymous about things
like that?

Post by Bill Baker
Given that I send my pictures to members of my family, that would be a
bit disgusting, given that I don't live in the Deep South.

God HATES it when you insult the Deep South. We don't NEVER Commit no
kinda incest in Mississippi.

And that's true because that's what Uncle Dad said!

Post by Bill Baker
Yes, and Q, R, S and T fantasies as well!

I mean URINATION.

Well it's certainly not just my-a-nation!

Post by Most Holy Mother Tucker
There's queers in this town what has pee pee party's. Men lay in metal
tubs and others take turns a peeing on them. Said pee may be swallered
too. Then they usually shoot their nasty diseased spooge over the
"bottoms" - 'til some kinda stinky froth builds up. Then they may swap
places. Do you get into that?

No, it's pretty hard to find a metal tub.

Post by Most Holy Mother Tucker
Lotsa queers uses this come on line at certain o' your gay bars around
here - "Will you piss on me?" I can use 'at word on accounta it's in
the King James Bible.

But you can say other things that aren't in the King James Bible, like
"pert" and "Mississippi."

Post by Bill Baker
See how much fun it can be to be a queer or a sex deviant?

But it's dangerous. Doesn't alla that promiscuous sex play havoc with
your emotions?

Sex can be an emotional release, too. I find the more sex a person has the
more relaxed they are.

Post by Bill Baker
Is it really a "pointer" or is it more of a "pinky?"

Why does your dirty mind wanna know? In Thurgood's case it's more
like a base ball bat - if'n you absolutely must now- and not the
corked kind neither.

Like the miniature novelty bats they sell at ball games?

Post by Bill Baker
Maybe. I still haven't seen any proof that you're not a character made
up by Max Varazslo.

I don't believe you'd ever tell me that.

Post by Bill Baker
That's what I said, southern.

God wants you to capitalize proper nouns what refers to Godly regions
o' His Country.

Israel?

Post by Bill Baker
Repressed people often deny it.

I ain't repressed not in no kinda denial. I am pure!

See what I mean?

Post by Bill Baker
At the very least!

Gross. Those are queer fantasy's. Why don't you just admit you're
queer? Are you on Twitter or MySpace, Bill?

Nope, neither one.

Post by Bill Baker
I can't tell you either, since you have no proof that they did that.

I do. I can tell a homo from a True Christian any day. Remember -
Thurgood and me saw thru Rufus and Burn-a-dykde Strangelust.

It sure took you several years.

Post by Bill Baker
Oh, don't take it personally. I just have fun pointing out religious
hypocrisy.

So do I - but you won't find NUNNA that in Our Holy Church.

<Chortle> If you say so.

Post by Bill Baker
I wish!

So you advocate care free sexual promiscuity then? Did you ever get
it on with a stranger at the gym???

Nah, some of those people are just too obsessed with their bodies and are
more interested in working out. Besides, they're mostly too tired from
working out for anything interesting.

Post by Bill Baker
Is that the only other way?

No. You coulda earned the money. Queers often get their money thru
shady means though, so I'm naturally suspicious of your kind.

Oh? You're absolutely sure I'm queer?

Post by Bill Baker
In the Midwest. Midwest, U.S.A.

That cover a wole lotta territory. Are you in Madison, Wisconsin?

I'm within 500 miles of that city.

Post by Bill Baker
So you would defy God's will after you die? Aren't you worried that he
would kick you out of heaven and send you to Venus?

Not one bit. My mansion is insured against fire. I just don't wanna
do nothing improper for a Child o' God.

Sure your mansion may be insured against fire, but what's to stop God from
kicking you out of it for defying his will?

Post by Bill Baker
Have those people been examined by secular doctors before and after? I'd
like to see proof.

If you have proof, go ahead and post it here.

Post by Bill Baker
Then sorry, no deal.

You know you wanna. Is your foreskin extra long or short? You might
not even miss it none?

But then again I might. Since I have no problems with my foreskin where it
is, I'd rather not take that chance.

Post by Bill Baker
That's hearsay.

Oh no! It's the unvarnished Truth!

Even if it is, it's still hearsay.

Post by Bill Baker
What if the morning after pill fails?

Then it's God's Will 'at she have 'at baby.

You're talking about God's will when you plan on defying it after you die?

Post by Bill Baker
What if for some legitimate reason she's not able to take the pill?

The case can be pesentedto Our Holy Church's Religious Court for
review. Usually the woman is expected to have the baby, though there
can be some exceptions.

Like if she wants an abortion?

Post by Bill Baker
As soon as I get that video from your church service.

We refuse to cast our precious pearls afore uncircumcised swine.

Well then don't expect any money from me.

Post by Most Holy Mother Tucker
Doesn't 'at foreskin o' your'n feel like excess baggage a flopping
around down there?

No.

Post by Bill Baker
Well then how do you expect the abortion doctors to make a living then?

They need to find something else to do - such as SAVE lives and not
snuff 'em out with suction pumps and human fetus scrapers. They'll
burn in hell for all's they done any way's.

What if it's their religion to do that? You got something against someone
practicing their religion?

Post by Bill Baker
If that worked, there wouldn't be as much rape.

True Christians are very seldom raped. We must be a doing something
right, HUH?

Unless you're comatose, HUH?

Post by Bill Baker
Why not? If it's not abortion, why shouldn't they get the morning after
pill?

Yeah, but if you just watch the commercials you won't know how to use them.
You'll just think it has to do with a guy showing up on a horse or
something.

Post by Bill Baker
Yes, and that's how I would be able to see circumcised penises without
necessarily being gay.

You sure do have a funny imagination. Most repressed people do.

Post by Bill Baker
It probably depends on how they were raised.

Most people today are brung up to be lazy. That's why most foreskins
are packed with smegma.

Even lazy people take a shower once in a while.

Post by Bill Baker
Only people who don't care about romance just dive.

Queers can't love - so mosta them just dive.

You mean like some people just teach their wives to lie still so they can
feel like a necrophiliac?

Post by Bill Baker
And only playing with the ding-dong is just gauche. There are plenty of
other parts of the body worth playing with.

Such as the butt hole, HUH? What does that taste like?

I'd imagine it would taste pretty crappy! Haw! Haw! Haw!

Post by Bill Baker
I don't recall ever agreeing to your rules about closing cases.

You don't have to agree. I make alla the rules on my Holy Gospel
threads.

There you go worshiping Allah again.

Post by Bill Baker
If there's someone who finds it humorous (me) then the humor must be there.

It may be "there" in your mind. You let your dirty imagination run
wild with you.

Oh, I think your imagination is running just as wild and just as dirty as
mine is!

Post by Bill Baker
Like bicycle spokes?

No - like a speaking God's Word to uncircumcised heathen blasphemers.

I like to think of each religion as bicycle spokes, all pointing to the same
God.

--
Hard drive dead?
Bring it back to life with SpinRite!
http://www.grc.com/sr/spinrite.htm

Most Holy Mother Tucker

2010-02-21 05:16:54 UTC

I had wrote a long detailed reply to your sissified screed, but then I
got distracted by my precious twin boy's and wiped out the whole thing
along with summa their doo doo. I may hafta prune a littla your a
rambling just to get my True Gospel for the Day out to my regular
readers. I got fans in Usenet, let me tell you.

Post by Bill Baker
I only wear rainbow clothes when I go into churches who preach that
homosexuality is sinful.

Do you go into Roman Catholic "churches" dressed like 'at? What kinda
church lets you in that-a-way? Only the Metropolitan Community Cult
for Queers would countenance that kinda behavior in a man. Is 'at the
one you go to? Which branch do you usually attend?

Post by Bill Baker
I like to see the looks on their faces, especially if I'm wearing women's clothes!

Is this the "church" o' Satan you're a going to? They say old Divine
took communion in drag at a Roman Catholic "church" onced. The priest
what gave it to her musta been all queer. She sure hot hers in the
end, HUH? Pun intended.

Post by Bill Baker
Now that's really perverted to have some sort of trophy wall for foreskins.

Thurgood doesn't think so. It encourages him in his war on sin,
depravity and air pollution. Wouldn't you like to make a SMALL
contribution. I'm sure 'tain't no big thang. Haw! Haw! Haw! (LOL
just doesn't cut it for me. In Our Most Holy Church we use that as a
cue to "Love Our Lord"!)

Post by Bill Baker
Not that I'm surprised or anything.

Does ANYTHING surprise you? Would you even gasp if'n you fount out
your mama was really your daddy and vice versa?

Post by Bill Baker
Is it? I could certainly say the same about what you write.

Ain't NOTHING I write even remotely "gay" and you know 'at! How DARE
you insult me that-a-way when you know I write Gospel sermonettes to
please the Lord Jesus.

Post by Bill Baker
Some of it just doesn't compare to the perversion I've heard from some of my gay
friends.

Are you a saying what I write is MORE weird 'an what the queer people
actually does? I can't believe 'at. Wouldja gimme an example so's I
can try to foller your shaky lina reasoning?

Post by Bill Baker
I'll mention something you wrote and they'll look at me with a
confused look and ask me where I heard that from.

They're probably in denial about the gerbil stuffing and the deep
crack rimming. I hear about stuff like 'at ever' day out here in
darkest New Sodom.

Post by Bill Baker
Well that much is true, I suppose.

Ever'thing I say is. I'm glad to see you acknowledge 'at finally.

Post by Bill Baker
I'm proud to be called a pervert!

Normal folk would be ashameda sumpin' like 'at. What's the most
perverted thing you ever done? Do you really like to get tied up and
whupped? Is fresh piss ever involved?

Post by Bill Baker
Then that must prove that you worship Satan, because what you wrote just
wasn't true.

Every SYLLABLE was totally True. God speaks directly thru me - and He
can't tell no lie's.

Post by Bill Baker
So you admit that some gay men don't hate women.

I said they either hate women or wanna BE women. There may be a
coupla exceptions here and 'ere, but in general them things is all
True.

Post by Bill Baker
I didn't know that everyone in Mississippi worshiped Allah!

We don't. I told you - "alla" is how we say "all of" in Mississippi.
Did you ever visit my beautiful state? I hope you didn't leave no
foot prints on the Sacred Soil.

Post by Bill Baker
But you proved above that you worship Satan by being wrong on something.

I NEVER! You just misconstrued the Truth again as per usual.

Post by Bill Baker
Pervert! Now you're coming on to me!

No I ain't. I mean the Glory o' God what shines thru me. I posted a
picture o' myself in my profile tonight. And yes I gained a little
extra weight after Jaden and Kaden were born. Please don't give me no
grief about 'at. Thurgood's a'ready threw out alla the lemon meringue
pie's I usta love.

Post by Bill Baker
I've actually never been out farther west than Kansas. And that was only to
see some relatives.

Are you alienated from them same relatives now? Do you live in
Evanston, Illinois? Did I mention that Southern people a'way's
pronounces the s in Illinois?

Post by Bill Baker
I believe that one is directly from the Queen's English, isn't it?

No. It's from Holy Prince Hubert's scientifical study's.

Post by Bill Baker
No, I didn't even have any hispes! Haw! Haw! Haw!

'Tain't funny onced you get 'em a crawling all over your flesh. I
heard most queer men's got 'em.

Post by Bill Baker
Why not? You seem to be genuinely interested in them.

I'm interested in a wiping them out. But if'n they're really what
gives you jolly jolly's, who am I to complain about it? I know - I'm
wunna God's Best Friends - but I'm a willing to live and let live.
One day your smegmaliths will get extra chunky and you'll CLAMOR to
get 'at nasty thing took offa you. Don't say I told you so.

Post by Bill Baker
I'd say it's a lot more common in the Deep South.

No way! The Deep South is the home o' thousands o' God fearing True
Christians. You can get no pornography nor booze in many county's
down 'ere. So incest is practically unknown thru out most of it.

Post by Bill Baker
Eh, not my thing really.

Your'n is foreskin, HUH? Do you ever dock? Do you know about 'at?

Post by Bill Baker
Who wouldn't keep the light on? You get to see some of the best things
then!

Like the butt holes you RIM? Is 'at what you mean? Do you a'way's
face your sex tricks? Or do you do it the dog style? What name do
you use over on Squirt.org(y)???

Post by Bill Baker
Don't you think I'm queer? If so why are you asking me if you think I'm
just going to lie?

I'm a trying to squeeze the Truth outa you one way or t'other.

Post by Bill Baker
I usually do a lot of chortling when I read your posts.

That's rude. Are you sure you ain't got some strange man's pubic hair
stuck in your throat? Why can't we be friends, brother? You know I
only want the best for you. Did you look at my picture? Do you think
I'm pretty?

Post by Bill Baker
So is Max the ventriloquist and you're the lonely woman? Or are you the
ventriloquist's dummy?

You gotta watch the show to see that. It explains ever'thing. Would
you believe 'at your friend Max has this split personality disorder
and that his doctors told him to write in character so's he can
function in the real world? That's just one hypothesis to consider.

Post by Bill Baker
Whichever they prefer.

Are you a saying you'll do a'most anything with a queer man you happen
to like? That's nasty. Do you swaller spooge?

Post by Bill Baker
If you say so.

No, YOU said so! Rimmer! Did God ever smite you with the hepatitis?

Post by Bill Baker
Nah, I want an independent video taken by someone not from your church. And
who says I have a PO Box? Why would I need to be anonymous about things
like that?

Queers usually is such. We don't allow no kinda lookiloo's into the
hallowed halls of Our Holy Church. It's sanctified.

Post by Bill Baker
And that's true because that's what Uncle Dad said!

Maybe your'n - but not mine. There ain't been no incest in my home
town for over a hundred years - since the Slave Day's at least.

Post by Bill Baker
Well it's certainly not just my-a-nation!

Do you let men piss on you? What about in your mouth? Do you crave
the taste of spooge?

Post by Bill Baker
No, it's pretty hard to find a metal tub.

Not down on Folsom Street. There's bare backing clubs all up and down
the strip. They even got a sex club done up like a prison house. Thy
actually stage prison gang rapes in 'ere. Does the idea o' that turn
you on any? You can say safe words if'n you want the butt banging to
stop - but from what I hear doesn't nobody ever do 'at. They just cry
out "More! More! Harder! Deeper! Faster!" You can hear all 'at
out on the street too! Least if'n you stand under the back winder.

Post by Bill Baker
But you can say other things that aren't in the King James Bible, like
"pert" and "Mississippi."

They're good words. We can't say dirty words what ain't sanctioned in
the Holy Writ.

Post by Bill Baker
Sex can be an emotional release, too. I find the more sex a person has the
more relaxed they are.

How many times do you usually do it then?

Post by Bill Baker
Like the miniature novelty bats they sell at ball games?

You mean the Louisville Slugger? No - it's more like a cannon at Fort
Knox! Do you consider Kentucky a Mid Western state or a Southern
one? It didn't break off from the Union 'at made war on the South.

Post by Bill Baker
I don't believe you'd ever tell me that.

Do you believe he's a bi sexual old enough to be my real daddy? It
could be that Carl Whitechapel, who raised me, adopted me from old Max
and some girl he knocked up in wuna them liberal arts colleges.

Post by Bill Baker
Israel?

Holy Israel and the Deep South both.

Post by Bill Baker
See what I mean?

No. You a'way's cloud the issue. I am totally pure. I ain't in
denial about nothing.

Post by Bill Baker
Nope, neither one.

Did you go look for Max's page to see if'n you ever slept with him?
Or done him in wunna them dark rooms? Is he wunna the queers what
told you how hot looking you supposably are down at the gay bar?

Post by Bill Baker
It sure took you several years.

No way. The witch hunt started the very day I moved in. They fooled
Sunshine, but not me.

Post by Bill Baker
<Chortle> If you say so.

I do. Our witch hunts would weed such filth out real easy. We keep
close tabs on alla our members. I spy.

Post by Bill Baker
Nah, some of those people are just too obsessed with their bodies and are
more interested in working out. Besides, they're mostly too tired from
working out for anything interesting.

I don't think so. There's a'way's hanky panky a going on in them
smoky steam rooms. How do you think alla that SPOOGE gets on the
floor in them places??? It doesn't crawl thru no vent and go PLOP.

Post by Bill Baker
Oh? You're absolutely sure I'm queer?

Pert near. Why? Ain't you proud of what you are?

Post by Bill Baker
I'm within 500 miles of that city.

What about Milwaukee? That figgers. That's where old Liberace was
from - more or less. Talk about denial. I hope his estate paid back
the news paper he sued what callt him a queer. Did I a'ready ask you
about Urbana?

Post by Bill Baker
Sure your mansion may be insured against fire, but what's to stop God from
kicking you out of it for defying his will?

I wouldn't never do 'at. I just need to be careful onced I get my
pilot's license to explore t'other planets. There's all kinda weird
slime out there in space. It shows up in New Sodom ever' day a'most -
lessen the fog is real low.

Post by Bill Baker
If you have proof, go ahead and post it here.

The Truly Faithful don't ask for no kinda proof. Is there anything
that afflicts you? Body odor (asida the obvious smegma, I mean),
athlete's foot, emerods about the fundament?

Post by Bill Baker
But then again I might. Since I have no problems with my foreskin where it
is, I'd rather not take that chance.

Did you ever get it caught in your zipper?

Post by Bill Baker
Even if it is, it's still hearsay.

But if'n Holy Prince Hubert vetted it, it's Scripturally sound and OK
for publication in an up lifting work like the "Kingdom Come!"

Post by Bill Baker
You're talking about God's will when you plan on defying it after you die?

Oh no! Never! You misconstrued my clear words AGAIN! That's the
devil insida you. You need a thorough exorcism in the Nama Jesus.

Post by Bill Baker
Like if she wants an abortion?

No. We don't never allow 'at. If'n necessary we can put the woman
into a coma 'til her baby is born and then bring her back out thru
passionate love making. Then she can have the baby but won't know
about the pains o' pregnancy and child birth. It actually gets easier
to pop baby's out the more you have. Does your butt hole get more
elastical with a lotta rectum ripping?

Post by Bill Baker
Well then don't expect any money from me.

Fine. Keep your dirty money. But please send me a nice picture.
Please - please - please.

It oughta. Does it ever drip oozy fluid?

Post by Bill Baker
What if it's their religion to do that?

Their "religion" could only be Satanism then. They deserve to suffer.

Post by Bill Baker
You got something against someone practicing their religion?

If'n it's a false religion - yes.

Post by Bill Baker
Unless you're comatose, HUH?

We don't "rape" nobody 'at's in a coma. We REVIVE them thru love
making - and ever' one of 'em is totally grateful. You should see how
much money such people donate to the Holy Church outa gratitude.

Post by Bill Baker
Yeah, but if you just watch the commercials you won't know how to use them.

Don't they come with instructions - and usually a lewd illustration or
two - on the wrapper. They even got special handling instructions for
you uncircumcised heathens in English and Spanish and Ebonics. You
all are supposta pull your cheese flaps alla the way back before you
put the rubber on. I know 'at some uncircumcised men can't do that.
Haw! Haw! Haw!

Post by Bill Baker
You'll just think it has to do with a guy showing up on a horse or
something.

Only a dumb bunny would think 'at was all there is to it. That's
supposta arouse the viewers curiosity. Them commercials is supposta
make preparation and precautions look all sexy.

Post by Bill Baker
You sure do have a funny imagination.

It's just True to life.

Post by Bill Baker
Most repressed people do.

But I ain't repressed about nothing. I make passionate love with
Thurgood ever' time I can have a baby. That's the very definition o'
satisfaction.

Post by Bill Baker
Even lazy people take a shower once in a while.

It takes more'n just 'at to dislodge smegmatical chunks. I seen summa
them things as big as a quarter! You should see 'em go SPLAT down at
the Mexican gay bars!

Post by Bill Baker
You mean like some people just teach their wives to lie still so they can
feel like a necrophiliac?

Thurgood doesn't do 'at for no prurient reason. He's just a trying to
help prolong the experience for the both of us. After while I start a
squirming and a thrashing around something fierce. We don't want alla
them wonderful sensations to end too soon.

Post by Bill Baker
I'd imagine it would taste pretty crappy! Haw! Haw! Haw!

That sure sounds like the voice of experience to me.

Post by Bill Baker
There you go worshiping Allah again.

I NEVER! "Alla" means "all of" not "Allah". Why do you hate Southern
talk so? I think it sounds Biblical.

Post by Bill Baker
Oh, I think your imagination is running just as wild and just as dirty as
mine is!

No way! My thoughts are as pure as a crystal mountain stream.

Post by Bill Baker
I like to think of each religion as bicycle spokes, all pointing to the same
God.

That's Hindu nonsense. Religion is a one way street that leads from a
world of sin thru Our Holy Church and then straight (!!!) to Heaven.

Send me some pictures -
***@repenthouse.org

Your friend,

Lurlean
Now foreskin-tolerant
Does 'at make you happy, brother???

Bill Baker

2010-02-21 07:03:00 UTC

On Sunday February 21 2010 00:16, Most Holy Mother Tucker <mother-

Post by Most Holy Mother Tucker
I had wrote a long detailed reply to your sissified screed, but then I
got distracted by my precious twin boy's and wiped out the whole thing
along with summa their doo doo. I may hafta prune a littla your a
rambling just to get my True Gospel for the Day out to my regular
readers. I got fans in Usenet, let me tell you.

I believe it! You're very entertaining.

Post by Bill Baker
I only wear rainbow clothes when I go into churches who preach that
homosexuality is sinful.

Do you go into Roman Catholic "churches" dressed like 'at?

Nah, the clergy are usually dressed in more color than that, anyway.

Post by Most Holy Mother Tucker
What kinda church lets you in that-a-way?

The kind that doesn't screen people at the door.

Post by Most Holy Mother Tucker
Only the Metropolitan Community Cult for Queers would countenance that
kinda behavior in a man. Is 'at the one you go to? Which branch do you
usually attend?

I don't attend church seriously. I just like to see the shocked look on
uptight people's faces.

Post by Bill Baker
I like to see the looks on their faces, especially if I'm wearing women's clothes!

Is this the "church" o' Satan you're a going to?

No, they wouldn't bat an eye at something like that. It wouldn't be any
fun.

Post by Most Holy Mother Tucker
They say old Divine took communion in drag at a Roman Catholic "church"
onced. The priest what gave it to her musta been all queer. She sure hot
hers in the end, HUH? Pun intended.

And I'm sure she appreciated every minute of it!

Post by Bill Baker
Now that's really perverted to have some sort of trophy wall for foreskins.

Thurgood doesn't think so.

Of course he doesn't, he's the pervert!

Post by Most Holy Mother Tucker
It encourages him in his war on sin, depravity and air pollution.
Wouldn't you like to make a SMALL contribution. I'm sure 'tain't no big
thang. Haw! Haw! Haw! (LOL just doesn't cut it for me. In Our Most
Holy Church we use that as a cue to "Love Our Lord"!)

I thought you said my foreskin was all floppy and like an elephant's trunk?

Post by Bill Baker
Not that I'm surprised or anything.

Does ANYTHING surprise you? Would you even gasp if'n you fount out
your mama was really your daddy and vice versa?

It might, seeing as how I've seen my mother breast feed my brother.

Post by Bill Baker
Is it? I could certainly say the same about what you write.

Ain't NOTHING I write even remotely "gay" and you know 'at! How DARE
you insult me that-a-way when you know I write Gospel sermonettes to
please the Lord Jesus.

Nearly everything you write is gay, about gays or describing in lurid detail
their sexual practices.

Post by Bill Baker
Some of it just doesn't compare to the perversion I've heard from some of
my gay friends.

Are you a saying what I write is MORE weird 'an what the queer people
actually does? I can't believe 'at. Wouldja gimme an example so's I
can try to foller your shaky lina reasoning?

Some of my gay friends had never heard of "snowballing" before. Others are
disgusted by your descriptions of coprophilia and say they could never do
that.

Post by Bill Baker
I'll mention something you wrote and they'll look at me with a
confused look and ask me where I heard that from.

They're probably in denial about the gerbil stuffing and the deep
crack rimming. I hear about stuff like 'at ever' day out here in
darkest New Sodom.

It sure is easy to hear about things you're actively engaged in, HUH?

Post by Bill Baker
Well that much is true, I suppose.

Ever'thing I say is. I'm glad to see you acknowledge 'at finally.

I acknowledge when you're right about things. Too bad you almost never
acknowledge when you're wrong about things.

Post by Bill Baker
I'm proud to be called a pervert!

Normal folk would be ashameda sumpin' like 'at. What's the most
perverted thing you ever done? Do you really like to get tied up and
whupped? Is fresh piss ever involved?

Ah, you're just looking to join in the fun, aren't you?

Post by Bill Baker
Then that must prove that you worship Satan, because what you wrote just
wasn't true.

Every SYLLABLE was totally True. God speaks directly thru me - and He
can't tell no lie's.

Well then your god must be Satan since what you wrote wasn't true.

Post by Bill Baker
So you admit that some gay men don't hate women.

I said they either hate women or wanna BE women. There may be a
coupla exceptions here and 'ere, but in general them things is all
True.

Thanks to your writing like this I'm convincing more and more people that
same-sex marriage would be a good thing.

Post by Bill Baker
I didn't know that everyone in Mississippi worshiped Allah!

We don't. I told you - "alla" is how we say "all of" in Mississippi.
Did you ever visit my beautiful state? I hope you didn't leave no
foot prints on the Sacred Soil.

Is it OK if I leave butt prints there?

Post by Bill Baker
But you proved above that you worship Satan by being wrong on something.

I NEVER! You just misconstrued the Truth again as per usual.

If I misconstrued it then it must not have been the truth.

Post by Bill Baker
Pervert! Now you're coming on to me!

Actually, some men think that women look better with a little extra weight.
More cushion for the pushin' is what they say.

Post by Bill Baker
I've actually never been out farther west than Kansas. And that was only
to see some relatives.

Are you alienated from them same relatives now?

Not at all.

Post by Most Holy Mother Tucker
Do you live in Evanston, Illinois?

I live within 500 miles of there.

Post by Most Holy Mother Tucker
Did I mention that Southern people a'way's pronounces the s in Illinois?

I think it's great that people in the Deep South are starting to learn to
recognize the letters of the alphabet.

Post by Bill Baker
I believe that one is directly from the Queen's English, isn't it?

No. It's from Holy Prince Hubert's scientifical study's.

And here I thought you'd gone all civilized on me.

Post by Bill Baker
No, I didn't even have any hispes! Haw! Haw! Haw!

'Tain't funny onced you get 'em a crawling all over your flesh. I
heard most queer men's got 'em.

Flesh? Yes, most queer men do have that.

Post by Bill Baker
Why not? You seem to be genuinely interested in them.

If it ever does get that way, I'll be sure to go to a secular doctor and get
it taken care of.

Post by Bill Baker
I'd say it's a lot more common in the Deep South.

No way! The Deep South is the home o' thousands o' God fearing True
Christians. You can get no pornography nor booze in many county's
down 'ere. So incest is practically unknown thru out most of it.

Isn't that where the incest is more common?

Post by Bill Baker
Eh, not my thing really.

Your'n is foreskin, HUH? Do you ever dock? Do you know about 'at?

Not really, and neither do many of my homosexual friends.

Post by Bill Baker
Who wouldn't keep the light on? You get to see some of the best things
then!

Like the butt holes you RIM? Is 'at what you mean? Do you a'way's
face your sex tricks? Or do you do it the dog style? What name do
you use over on Squirt.org(y)???

What name do you use? Maybe I'll sign up in order to say hello to you
there.

Post by Bill Baker
Don't you think I'm queer? If so why are you asking me if you think I'm
just going to lie?

I'm a trying to squeeze the Truth outa you one way or t'other.

Nah, you're just trying to get me to say what you want to hear. But that's
OK, this is a lot of fun!

Post by Bill Baker
I usually do a lot of chortling when I read your posts.

That's rude. Are you sure you ain't got some strange man's pubic hair
stuck in your throat?

No, just some laughter from a very strange woman's Usenet posts!

Post by Most Holy Mother Tucker
Why can't we be friends, brother? You know I only want the best for you.
Did you look at my picture? Do you think I'm pretty?

From what I can see you're not bad looking.

Post by Bill Baker
So is Max the ventriloquist and you're the lonely woman? Or are you the
ventriloquist's dummy?

I'm not surprised to hear that.

Post by Bill Baker
Whichever they prefer.

Are you a saying you'll do a'most anything with a queer man you happen
to like? That's nasty. Do you swaller spooge?

Is that what you like to fantasize that I do?

Post by Bill Baker
If you say so.

No, YOU said so! Rimmer! Did God ever smite you with the hepatitis?

I said so? Where?

Post by Bill Baker
Nah, I want an independent video taken by someone not from your church.
And who says I have a PO Box? Why would I need to be anonymous about
things like that?

Queers usually is such. We don't allow no kinda lookiloo's into the
hallowed halls of Our Holy Church. It's sanctified.

Well, too bad then.

Post by Bill Baker
And that's true because that's what Uncle Dad said!

Maybe your'n - but not mine. There ain't been no incest in my home
town for over a hundred years - since the Slave Day's at least.

Is that what your Aunt Sister told you?

Post by Bill Baker
Well it's certainly not just my-a-nation!

Do you let men piss on you? What about in your mouth? Do you crave
the taste of spooge?

Nah, I usually crave the taste of a good steak.

Post by Bill Baker
No, it's pretty hard to find a metal tub.

The back winder is near the street?

Post by Bill Baker
But you can say other things that aren't in the King James Bible, like
"pert" and "Mississippi."

They're good words. We can't say dirty words what ain't sanctioned in
the Holy Writ.

The word "Bible" isn't even in the Bible!

Post by Bill Baker
Sex can be an emotional release, too. I find the more sex a person has
the more relaxed they are.

How many times do you usually do it then?

Not as often as I'd like!

Post by Bill Baker
Like the miniature novelty bats they sell at ball games?

You mean the Louisville Slugger? No - it's more like a cannon at Fort
Knox!

Well, that's not a bat!

Post by Most Holy Mother Tucker
Do you consider Kentucky a Mid Western state or a Southern
one? It didn't break off from the Union 'at made war on the South.

Kentucky is part Southern and part Appalachian.

Post by Bill Baker
I don't believe you'd ever tell me that.

Hey, whatever you want to believe.

Post by Bill Baker
Israel?

Holy Israel and the Deep South both.

Where in the Bible does it say that about the Deep South?

Post by Bill Baker
See what I mean?

No. You a'way's cloud the issue. I am totally pure. I ain't in
denial about nothing.

See? You're still denying your denial.

Post by Bill Baker
Nope, neither one.

Did you go look for Max's page to see if'n you ever slept with him?
Or done him in wunna them dark rooms?

Who would want to have sex in a dark room? I'd rather the room be bright so
I don't miss a second of the action!

Post by Most Holy Mother Tucker
Is he wunna the queers what told you how hot looking you supposably are
down at the gay bar?

I have no idea.

Post by Bill Baker
It sure took you several years.

No way. The witch hunt started the very day I moved in. They fooled
Sunshine, but not me.

Bernadette was posting here for several years, though.

Post by Bill Baker
<Chortle> If you say so.

I do. Our witch hunts would weed such filth out real easy. We keep
close tabs on alla our members. I spy.

Yes, I know how much your church is into voyeurism.

I don't think so. There's a'way's hanky panky a going on in them
smoky steam rooms. How do you think alla that SPOOGE gets on the
floor in them places??? It doesn't crawl thru no vent and go PLOP.

I thought you said some tries to crawl up your leg? If that's the case,
then why can't it crawl through a vent?

Post by Bill Baker
Oh? You're absolutely sure I'm queer?

Pert near. Why? Ain't you proud of what you are?

Why don't you just get God to tell you if you want to know so badly?

Post by Bill Baker
I'm within 500 miles of that city.

What about Milwaukee?

I'm within 500 miles of there.

Post by Most Holy Mother Tucker
That figgers. That's where old Liberace was from - more or less. Talk
about denial. I hope his estate paid back the news paper he sued what
callt him a queer. Did I a'ready ask you about Urbana?

I'm within 500 miles of there, too.

Post by Bill Baker
Sure your mansion may be insured against fire, but what's to stop God
from kicking you out of it for defying his will?

Then you must be bringing it back with you from your spirit journeys. See
what I mean about doing God's will?

Post by Bill Baker
If you have proof, go ahead and post it here.

The Truly Faithful don't ask for no kinda proof.

Is that so? I'll have to remember that.

Post by Most Holy Mother Tucker
Is there anything that afflicts you? Body odor (asida the obvious smegma,
I mean), athlete's foot, emerods about the fundament?

Nope, none of those things.

Post by Bill Baker
But then again I might. Since I have no problems with my foreskin where
it is, I'd rather not take that chance.

Did you ever get it caught in your zipper?

No.

Post by Bill Baker
Even if it is, it's still hearsay.

But if'n Holy Prince Hubert vetted it, it's Scripturally sound and OK
for publication in an up lifting work like the "Kingdom Come!"

Even if all that's true, it's still hearsay.

Post by Bill Baker
You're talking about God's will when you plan on defying it after you die?

Oh no! Never! You misconstrued my clear words AGAIN! That's the
devil insida you. You need a thorough exorcism in the Nama Jesus.

You're the one who said you didn't want to spread diseases to other planets,
even if it was God's will.

Post by Bill Baker
Like if she wants an abortion?

No. We don't never allow 'at.

I thought I read in here that you had one though? One of the other posters
was talking about it.

Post by Most Holy Mother Tucker
If'n necessary we can put the woman into a coma 'til her baby is born and
then bring her back out thru passionate love making. Then she can have
the baby but won't know about the pains o' pregnancy and child birth. It
actually gets easier to pop baby's out the more you have. Does your butt
hole get more elastical with a lotta rectum ripping?

But you sure couldn't stop Sunshine from getting an abortion, could you?

Post by Bill Baker
Well then don't expect any money from me.

Fine. Keep your dirty money. But please send me a nice picture.
Please - please - please.

I already sent you nineteen.

It oughta. Does it ever drip oozy fluid?

No.

Post by Bill Baker
What if it's their religion to do that?

Their "religion" could only be Satanism then. They deserve to suffer.

So why don't they have a right to practice their religion? Don't you think
they should have the same rights as you?

Post by Bill Baker
You got something against someone practicing their religion?

If'n it's a false religion - yes.

Why are you so hateful towards other people's religion? I thought you
wanted people to respect your religion. Why can't you respect theirs?

Post by Bill Baker
Unless you're comatose, HUH?

We don't "rape" nobody 'at's in a coma. We REVIVE them thru love
making - and ever' one of 'em is totally grateful. You should see how
much money such people donate to the Holy Church outa gratitude.

Doesn't matter if they're grateful or not, it's still rape.

Post by Bill Baker
Yeah, but if you just watch the commercials you won't know how to use them.

There's no condom that I've seen that includes that particular instruction.

Post by Bill Baker
You'll just think it has to do with a guy showing up on a horse or
something.

Only a dumb bunny would think 'at was all there is to it. That's
supposta arouse the viewers curiosity. Them commercials is supposta
make preparation and precautions look all sexy.

By inviting a guy on a horse clad in latex to join...oh, I see what you're
thinking.

Post by Bill Baker
You sure do have a funny imagination.

It's just True to life.

If that's what you want to imagine.

Post by Bill Baker
Most repressed people do.

But I ain't repressed about nothing. I make passionate love with
Thurgood ever' time I can have a baby. That's the very definition o'
satisfaction.

If you're not screaming and thrashing about at the height of ecstasy then
you're doing something wrong.

Post by Bill Baker
Even lazy people take a shower once in a while.

It takes more'n just 'at to dislodge smegmatical chunks. I seen summa
them things as big as a quarter! You should see 'em go SPLAT down at
the Mexican gay bars!

Why would it take more than that if they go SPLAT so easily?

Post by Bill Baker
You mean like some people just teach their wives to lie still so they can
feel like a necrophiliac?

Why worry about ending so soon when you can just go again in another hour?

Post by Bill Baker
I'd imagine it would taste pretty crappy! Haw! Haw! Haw!

That sure sounds like the voice of experience to me.

Imagination sounds like experience? That sure explains a lot.

Post by Bill Baker
There you go worshiping Allah again.

I NEVER! "Alla" means "all of" not "Allah". Why do you hate Southern
talk so? I think it sounds Biblical.

I don't remember anyone in the Bible talking about Allah.

Post by Bill Baker
Oh, I think your imagination is running just as wild and just as dirty as
mine is!

No way! My thoughts are as pure as a crystal mountain stream.

Not from what I've seen here in this post alone!

Post by Bill Baker
I like to think of each religion as bicycle spokes, all pointing to the
same God.

That's Hindu nonsense. Religion is a one way street that leads from a
world of sin thru Our Holy Church and then straight (!!!) to Heaven.

Yep, and the same with other religions, too.

Post by Most Holy Mother Tucker
Send me some pictures -
Your friend,
Lurlean
Now foreskin-tolerant
Does 'at make you happy, brother???

Hey, whatever floats your boat.

--
Hard drive dead?
Bring it back to life with SpinRite!
http://www.grc.com/sr/spinrite.htm

Most Holy Mother Tucker

2010-02-21 20:32:34 UTC

Post by Bill Baker
I believe it! You're very entertaining.

But I don't never write for nobody's entertainment. I write to save
souls from eternal damnation. I think it's mean spirited o' you to
laugh at my creative efforts. It's like a going into the Louvre over
in Gai Paris and a laughing at a painting on accounta you just don't
happen t'understand Fine Art. That's what my Holiness preaching is,
you know. Do you know there was 'is congress man or sumpin' out here
who proposed a making all religious literature and advertising carry
the disclaimer "for entertainment purposes only". Ain't 'at just all
rude?! He even wanted to stamp Holy Bibles with "adults only"
warnings. I think 'at's sick.

Post by Bill Baker
Nah, the clergy are usually dressed in more color than that, anyway.

How many queer priests do you personally know? How many a' you known
in the Biblical sense? Do they usually take their priestly robes off
during the act?

Post by Bill Baker
The kind that doesn't screen people at the door.

We can't afford to let no kinda riff raff into God's One True Church.
Heathens a'way's wanna disrupt the faith healing service.

Post by Bill Baker
I don't attend church seriously. I just like to see the shocked look on
uptight people's faces.

So you go to very orthodox churches, HUH? Did you ever go into one a
wearing kinda revealing clothes - such as your tight pants or short
shorts what let your long foreskin peek thru at the bottom? What
about a tight tank top 'at lets your hairy arm pits drip sweat all
over the pew's? I'm a feeling warm just a thinking about 'at
scenario. Sister Sunshine usta do 'at kinda provocative stuff when she
was fulla the devil. She would go to Pentecostal churches in a mini
skirt without no under wear on and try to sit up front where she could
spread her legs to put on a little show to try to distract the
preacher. She says she usta pick up tricks in churches. That
wouldn't never try that kinda FILTH in Our Most Holy Church.

Post by Bill Baker
No, they wouldn't bat an eye at something like that. It wouldn't be any
fun.

Ain't mosta your Satanical "churches" into heavy bondage and
discipline?

Post by Bill Baker
And I'm sure she appreciated every minute of it!

But she lived fast and DIED young! To many party's, drugs, dirty
movie's and sex tricks!

Post by Bill Baker
Of course he doesn't, he's the pervert!

He is NOT! Don't you keep memorabilia of the mile stones you queers
a' reached in a ruining marriage for the whole world - such as a lista
states what's allowed such wickedness to prosper? How's 'at any
diff'rent from a keeping a wall for foreskins? They're saved in
little plastic envelopes so's they won't stink as they shrivel up any
way's.

Post by Bill Baker
I thought you said my foreskin was all floppy and like an elephant's trunk?

I was just asking you 'bout 'at. My conclusion is that since your
foreskin doesn't stink it must be pretty small so's very little smegma
ever piles up down there. O' course, if'n you sent me a picture I
could see alla this for myself, HUH?

Post by Bill Baker
It might, seeing as how I've seen my mother breast feed my brother.

I think it's abusive for a woman to put on such a display afore her
children. Was she a flower power girl back in the sixty's? Do you
gotta beard, Bill?

Post by Bill Baker
Nearly everything you write is gay, about gays or describing in lurid detail
their sexual practices.

Them's just revelations o' the utter depravity o' the homo sexual -
things your kind tries hard (!!!) to keep covered up..

Post by Bill Baker
Some of my gay friends had never heard of "snowballing" before.

Maybe they don't call it 'at - but I think they were familiar with the
practice - even experienced in it. Some people calls it "spooge
swapping". Naturally they often got other colorful words for spooge
since they like it n so many diff'rent flavors, HUH?

Post by Bill Baker
Others are disgusted by your descriptions of coprophilia and say they could never do
that.

Do you mean the RIMMING? Well - if'n doesn't nobody never do it none
why is there plenty of it in pert near ever' queer porno what's ever
been made? Somebody gets off on alla that sicko stuff - and it sure
ain't Good and Godly people like me.

Post by Bill Baker
It sure is easy to hear about things you're actively engaged in, HUH?

No way! I am totally faithful to my husband. I wouldn't even wanna
handle no gerbils - much less stuff one you know where. You know -
out here early of a morning they run this long info mercial on the TV
a showing this supposed woman "doctor" dressed in a mini skirt and a
giving you a view deep down into the depths o' silicone valley and a
saying sumpin' like "Every man wants his you-know-what to be longer,
thicker and stronger". Even though it's mostly aimed at straight
men, it's the queers what orders the phony product she's a selling.
It's supposta be made from an age old herbal formula. The old slut
offers a double money back guarantee for when it turns out not to work
- which it won't never. Do you get 'at back in Hibbing, Minnesota,
Bill? Or is it Troy, Michigan? Or GARRRY, Indiana??? Look here...

http://www.infomercial-hell.com/extamax/

Post by Bill Baker
I acknowledge when you're right about things. Too bad you almost never
acknowledge when you're wrong about things.

Oh, I can be mistook about some things. I a'way's try to own up to my
genuine errors too. It's just 'at I'm careful not to never lie about
nothing.

Post by Bill Baker
Ah, you're just looking to join in the fun, aren't you?

No way! Is it so wrong to live vicariously? You don't get no herpes
from that. Or even the himpes. Is that the all queer variety - or
just the man's formula? Haw! Haw! Haw!

Post by Bill Baker
Well then your god must be Satan since what you wrote wasn't true.

What part do you think ain't True. I often reveal the hidden Truth
people like you just can't recognize.

Post by Bill Baker
Thanks to your writing like this I'm convincing more and more people that
same-sex marriage would be a good thing.

How does it do that? What do I need to change to make the idea o'
queer SHAM marriage sound as disgusting as what it really is?

Post by Bill Baker
Is it OK if I leave butt prints there?

You mean on the ground? Why would you wanna do that? Is your butt
real hairy, Bill? I was just a wondering. Thurgood says I can look
at pictures of other men so long as I don't actually cheat. I got
what you might call a clinical interest in the body's and sexual
habits o' sick perverts like you. My personal research tells me, for
example, that most queer men's got nipples what's larger'n normal. Do
YOU???

Post by Bill Baker
If I misconstrued it then it must not have been the truth.

No, it was. You just garbled up the words and tried to say they mean
sumpin' else besides what they mean.

Post by Bill Baker
Actually, some men think that women look better with a little extra weight.
More cushion for the pushin' is what they say.

Thurgood wants me to be think and fair and quiet in the bed room. Did
i ever tell you about the white shroud and the lily?

Post by Bill Baker
Not at all.

Do they know you're all queer?

Post by Bill Baker
I live within 500 miles of there.

Why is this such a secret? Will you tell me if'n I get it right?
What about Oak Park, Illinois.

Post by Bill Baker
I think it's great that people in the Deep South are starting to learn to
recognize the letters of the alphabet.

Oh please! We are very literate. Just look how much True Gospel
Preaching I churn out ever' day.

Post by Bill Baker
And here I thought you'd gone all civilized on me.

I'm more civilized than what you are. I don't show off in no gay
bars. Were your nipples all hard when the queers were a swarming
around you, brother?

Post by Bill Baker
Flesh? Yes, most queer men do have that.

No, I mean the herpes family o' viruses.

Post by Bill Baker
If it ever does get that way, I'll be sure to go to a secular doctor and get
it taken care of.

They'll just wanna get you hooked on some kinda pill or t'other. My
husband will up root that nasty foreskin o' your'n from the roots!
Imagine a being FREE from foreskin and alla its ugly limitations.

Post by Bill Baker
Isn't that where the incest is more common?

No way! That's in rural area's up in places like Maine and Minnesota
where people get the cabin fever. Don't even get me started on them
Canadians and their frozen smegma.

Post by Bill Baker
Not really, and neither do many of my homosexual friends.

Do I gotta teach you ever'thing about homo sexual depravity? How do
you think I find out about alla these queer perversions? I just keep
my ears open when I'm around alla the queers. Looky here...

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Docking_(sex)#Genital-genital_sex

Post by Bill Baker
What name do you use? Maybe I'll sign up in order to say hello to you
there.

Well - I personally don't never go on 'at filthy sex site - mostly on
accounta I'm a straight woman totally devoted to her loving husband.
But I HEARD that Brother Phinehas very occasionally monitors the group
under the handle "Radical". If'n you sign up please post a revealing
photo plus alla your stats. Brother Phinehas will then advise me how
truly depraved you really are.

Post by Bill Baker
Nah, you're just trying to get me to say what you want to hear. But that's
OK, this is a lot of fun!

I only want the Truth outa any man - even a perverted uncircumcised
blasphemer. I guess you could say I got some kinda thing for you. I
will a'way's be faithful to my husband o' course - but I would like to
get to know you better.

Post by Bill Baker
No, just some laughter from a very strange woman's Usenet posts!

Are you a calling me very strange? You KNOW I ain't nothing like
'at. I'm a good woman. I go to Church three times a week at least.
I take good cara my family and friends. I preach the True and Full
Gospel and lead sinners to the Lord ever' day. How does a doing alla
them wonderful things make me strange?

Post by Bill Baker
From what I can see you're not bad looking.

Does my beauty make you wanna go straight?

Post by Bill Baker
I'm not surprised to hear that.

You wouldn't want the multiple personality disorder to over whelm
neither of us, wouldja? So send me some pictures OF YOU so's we can
all keep our wits about us. 'At's only a theory by the way - not the
Truth I'm a'way's so careful to preach.

Post by Bill Baker
Is that what you like to fantasize that I do?

I don't actually fantasize about you. I just wonder what kinda stuff
you really do - and what your body looks like. Do you got a lotta
hair on your back, for instance. These details will help me focus my
ecstatic visions.

Post by Bill Baker
I said so? Where?

in the post where you said you'd do what ever it takes.

Post by Bill Baker
Well, too bad then.

You could a'way's join the Church. You won't be able to reveal no
kinda revealing clothes in the Holy Sanctuary.

Post by Bill Baker
Is that what your Aunt Sister told you?

I don't not no such mixed up relatives. I didn't grow up in the
mountains where people can't get out and mingle.

Post by Bill Baker
Nah, I usually crave the taste of a good steak.

Do you mean TUBE steak?!?! Haw! Haw! Haw!

Post by Bill Baker
The back winder is near the street?

Pert near, yes. You gotta go down a little walk way to get to the
back winders - but it's all accessible from the side walk.

Post by Bill Baker
The word "Bible" isn't even in the Bible!

It's on the cover!

Post by Bill Baker
Not as often as I'd like!

Can you give me a nice round number? Do you have sex ever' week, for
instance? Do you play with your own ding-a-ling?

Post by Bill Baker
Well, that's not a bat!

It feels like a cannon when it fires me into orbit!

Post by Bill Baker
Kentucky is part Southern and part Appalachian.

The people there doesn't necessarily think so. Indiana is right
across the river from there, you know. You know about Indiana,
right? Ever been to Fort Wayne? And Michigan is right above
Indiana. Tell me about Kalamazoo. See - I know my geography. Do you
ever go to that wicked nudist colony that's right near where Indiana,
Ohio and Kentucky meet? Do you consider Ohio a Midwestern State? Are
you from Youngstown???

Post by Bill Baker
Hey, whatever you want to believe.

No. That ain't what happened at all. He's my Jewish God father
though.

Post by Bill Baker
Where in the Bible does it say that about the Deep South?

It speaks of the Queen o' the South a rising up to rebuke the world's
last depraved generation.

Post by Bill Baker
See? You're still denying your denial.

No I ain't neither. What is it I'm supposta be a denying any way's?

Post by Bill Baker
Who would want to have sex in a dark room?

Most queers what goes to the gay bars - which you freely admitted you
do.

Post by Bill Baker
I'd rather the room be bright so I don't miss a second of the action!

Did you ever do it in a hospital bed?

Post by Bill Baker
I have no idea.

You all didn't never trade names, HUH? Typical queer behavior.

Post by Bill Baker
Bernadette was posting here for several years, though.

I saw right thru her little game the day I moved into that shack over
on Lezbo Lane. Burn-a-dyke was a poisoning my husband on accounta she
wanted to screw around with Sunshine.

Post by Bill Baker
Yes, I know how much your church is into voyeurism.

'Tain't voyeurism - which is all about sex. It's more like
surveillance - which is all about a protecting people from harm.

Post by Bill Baker
I thought you said some tries to crawl up your leg?

That's the virally infected kind. O' course, you got plentya that in
them queer flesh gyms too.

Post by Bill Baker
If that's the case, then why can't it crawl through a vent?

The little polly wogs all dies eventually, probably from the AIDS.

Post by Bill Baker
Why don't you just get God to tell you if you want to know so badly?

He decided to withhold dorect disclosure from me for now.

Post by Bill Baker
I'm within 500 miles of there.

Is Pennsylvania Mid Western or Mid Atlantic? What about Pittsburgh?

Post by Bill Baker
I'm within 500 miles of there, too.

I wanna know EXACTLY where you are.

Post by Bill Baker
Then you must be bringing it back with you from your spirit journeys.

No. I ain't been out 'at far still yet.

Post by Bill Baker
See what I mean about doing God's will?

I a'way's do God's Will. I just know I gotta be careful not to get
all carried away like old Icarus done with his wings.

Post by Bill Baker
Is that so? I'll have to remember that.

That's True when it comes to you asking for proofa God's promises and
special blessings.

Post by Bill Baker
Nope, none of those things.

Highblood pressure, fallen arches, gas pains, clap o' the yap?

It must be real short then.

Post by Bill Baker
Even if all that's true, it's still hearsay.

But it passed muster with Dr. Hubert Hickey - future prince of all
America.

Post by Bill Baker
You're the one who said you didn't want to spread diseases to other planets,
even if it was God's will.

I didn't put it that-a-way. I said I didn't wanna be the one to
spread viral plagues from one spiral nebula to t'other.

Post by Bill Baker
I thought I read in here that you had one though? One of the other posters
was talking about it.

That was Scotty in Fort Lumbardwell. He was just a kidding. Like
you, he KNOWS better'n 'at. He's even my Facebook friend. You could
be too, you know. Are you a gonna look for "Radical" over on the
Squirt web site?

Post by Bill Baker
But you sure couldn't stop Sunshine from getting an abortion, could you?

She went to secular quacks and MURDERED Thurgood's precious baby.
That's why God promised him fourteen children in recompense. I told
him he could go seed her again thru the tubule. I'm all wore out from
a birthing baby's.

Post by Bill Baker
I already sent you nineteen.

I mean of YOU!

That's a good thing. Some men get all wet and gooey down there.

Post by Bill Baker
So why don't they have a right to practice their religion? Don't you think
they should have the same rights as you?

In a True Theocracy they will have to choose from a lista approved
religions. Satanism won't be on it.

Post by Bill Baker
Why are you so hateful towards other people's religion?

I ain't. I love ever'body - even the faggots.

Post by Bill Baker
I thought you wanted people to respect your religion. Why can't you respect theirs?

I do - if'n it's a real religion such as Buddhism or Christian Science
or Judaism. I got no time for $cientology or the "Rev" Ike.

Post by Bill Baker
Doesn't matter if they're grateful or not, it's still rape.

No it ain't. How come ain't nobody ever complaint about that kinda
treatment.

Post by Bill Baker
There's no condom that I've seen that includes that particular instruction.

Look again. Maybe you missed 'at part in your amazement over the siza
the ding-dong in the picture they showed.

http://www.trojancondoms.com/ArticleDetails.aspx?ArticleId=10

At least these instructions glorify STRAIGHT sex over queer.

Post by Bill Baker
By inviting a guy on a horse clad in latex to join...oh, I see what you're
thinking.

Only a pervert would make 'at connection. The man on the horse is
supposta suggest sex appeal - and that real sexy people take
precautions. Our Holy Church is diff'rent from t'others in 'at we
teach that it's a good thing for sex deviats to use rubbers ever'
time. We don;t want their diseases OR their unwanted children a
polluting God's Creation.

Post by Bill Baker
If that's what you want to imagine.

What about my preaching is untrue to life - in your opinion at least.
Do you shave your nutty buddy's?

Post by Bill Baker
If you're not screaming and thrashing about at the height of ecstasy then
you're doing something wrong.

We ain't a doing nothing wrong.

Post by Bill Baker
Why would it take more than that if they go SPLAT so easily?

Some of 'em's soaked in pee by 'at time.

Post by Bill Baker
Why worry about ending so soon when you can just go again in another hour?

He can't do that no more.

Post by Bill Baker
Imagination sounds like experience? That sure explains a lot.

Why don't you show insteada just a telling me stuff?

Post by Bill Baker
I don't remember anyone in the Bible talking about Allah.

I'll sell you a CD of my a pronouncing them two words for ou to clear
up any kinda confusion, OK? Only $1.

Post by Bill Baker
Not from what I've seen here in this post alone!

Hah! That's just you a trying to pee in my clean mountain stream.

Post by Bill Baker
Yep, and the same with other religions, too.

Our'n is the only True One though.

Post by Bill Baker
Hey, whatever floats your boat.

A full frontal nude photo of you would yank it completely outa the
water.

Jesus saveth

Mother Tucker
True Christian Sex Researcher

Bill Baker

2010-02-22 05:40:49 UTC

On Sunday February 21 2010 15:32, Most Holy Mother Tucker <mother-

Post by Bill Baker
I believe it! You're very entertaining.

But I don't never write for nobody's entertainment. I write to save
souls from eternal damnation. I think it's mean spirited o' you to
laugh at my creative efforts.

I think it's a huge compliment! You're very funny.

Post by Most Holy Mother Tucker
It's like a going into the Louvre over in Gai Paris and a laughing at a
painting on accounta you just don't happen t'understand Fine Art.

If the Fine Art is funny, why not laugh?

Post by Most Holy Mother Tucker
That's what my Holiness preaching is, you know. Do you know there was 'is
congress man or sumpin' out here who proposed a making all religious
literature and advertising carry the disclaimer "for entertainment
purposes only". Ain't 'at just all rude?!

Not really, they do the same thing for those phone psychics.

Post by Most Holy Mother Tucker
He even wanted to stamp Holy Bibles with "adults only" warnings. I think
'at's sick.

Well some of the stories in there are pretty violent and a couple of the
books are pretty sexually explicit. I'm not saying I agree with him, I just
see where he's coming from.

Post by Bill Baker
Nah, the clergy are usually dressed in more color than that, anyway.

How many queer priests do you personally know? How many a' you known
in the Biblical sense? Do they usually take their priestly robes off
during the act?

Honey, I insist on complete nudity from anyone I'm having sex with!

Post by Bill Baker
The kind that doesn't screen people at the door.

We can't afford to let no kinda riff raff into God's One True Church.
Heathens a'way's wanna disrupt the faith healing service.

Well, maybe you could install a laugh track in there so they know when
they're supposed to laugh like they did in those old sitcoms. Then they
won't be so disruptive.

Post by Bill Baker
I don't attend church seriously. I just like to see the shocked look on
uptight people's faces.

Yeah, I know. Most of your clergy prefers gay porn.

Post by Bill Baker
No, they wouldn't bat an eye at something like that. It wouldn't be any
fun.

Ain't mosta your Satanical "churches" into heavy bondage and
discipline?

Probably, that's why it wouldn't be any use trying to shock them.

Post by Bill Baker
And I'm sure she appreciated every minute of it!

But she lived fast and DIED young! To many party's, drugs, dirty
movie's and sex tricks!

Hey, sometimes that's the best way to go! Who wants to end their life in an
old age home dying from some disease that doesn't allow you to do anything?

Post by Bill Baker
Of course he doesn't, he's the pervert!

He is NOT! Don't you keep memorabilia of the mile stones you queers
a' reached in a ruining marriage for the whole world - such as a lista
states what's allowed such wickedness to prosper?

Nah, no need. I can always look that stuff up on Wikipedia if I want to.

Post by Most Holy Mother Tucker
How's 'at any diff'rent from a keeping a wall for foreskins? They're
saved in little plastic envelopes so's they won't stink as they shrivel up
any way's.

That's *way* different! It's like a doctor keeping the placenta of every
baby he's delivered. If that's what you're into, more power to you, but
don't pretend it's not perverted.

Post by Bill Baker
I thought you said my foreskin was all floppy and like an elephant's trunk?

But you can see uncircumcised penises on lots of websites. Mine doesn't
look all that much different from anyone else's.

Post by Bill Baker
It might, seeing as how I've seen my mother breast feed my brother.

I think it's abusive for a woman to put on such a display afore her
children.

Not really. I never saw anything dirty or anything like that.

Post by Most Holy Mother Tucker
Was she a flower power girl back in the sixty's? Do you gotta beard,
Bill?

Actually she and my father are pretty straight-laced, even if they are
liberal. And no, I'm clean-shaven.

Post by Bill Baker
Nearly everything you write is gay, about gays or describing in lurid
detail their sexual practices.

Them's just revelations o' the utter depravity o' the homo sexual -
things your kind tries hard (!!!) to keep covered up..

Exactly. Nearly everything you write about is gay or about gays and their
sexual practices.

Post by Bill Baker
Some of my gay friends had never heard of "snowballing" before.

Maybe they don't call it 'at - but I think they were familiar with the
practice - even experienced in it.

No, I described it to them.

Post by Most Holy Mother Tucker
Some people calls it "spooge swapping". Naturally they often got other
colorful words for spooge since they like it n so many diff'rent flavors,
HUH?

Why not use some flavoring to spice it up (or sweeten it up) a bit?

Post by Bill Baker
Others are disgusted by your descriptions of coprophilia and say they
could never do that.

Not all of the homosexuals I know watch pornos.

Post by Bill Baker
It sure is easy to hear about things you're actively engaged in, HUH?

Those commercials just seem silly and make the women look dumb. No real
cleverness or imagination to them at all.

Post by Bill Baker
I acknowledge when you're right about things. Too bad you almost never
acknowledge when you're wrong about things.

Oh, I can be mistook about some things. I a'way's try to own up to my
genuine errors too. It's just 'at I'm careful not to never lie about
nothing.

So when you're wrong that means you're not speaking for God? Why can't you
tell before you're wrong?

Post by Bill Baker
Ah, you're just looking to join in the fun, aren't you?

No way! Is it so wrong to live vicariously?

No, but living vicariously means you're not satisfied with your own life.

Post by Most Holy Mother Tucker
You don't get no herpes from that. Or even the himpes. Is that the all
queer variety - or just the man's formula? Haw! Haw! Haw!

Probably! If you spell it with a capital H, is that the kind Jesus gets?

Post by Bill Baker
Well then your god must be Satan since what you wrote wasn't true.

What part do you think ain't True. I often reveal the hidden Truth
people like you just can't recognize.

You said that queer men either hate women or want to be women. Some queer
men I know are neither.

Post by Bill Baker
Thanks to your writing like this I'm convincing more and more people that
same-sex marriage would be a good thing.

How does it do that? What do I need to change to make the idea o'
queer SHAM marriage sound as disgusting as what it really is?

As long as you keep trying to make it sound disgusting I'll be able to
convince more people.

Post by Bill Baker
Is it OK if I leave butt prints there?

You mean on the ground? Why would you wanna do that?

Well, you said no footprints so I was just imagining what other kinds of
prints I could leave.

Post by Most Holy Mother Tucker
Is your butt real hairy, Bill? I was just a wondering. Thurgood says I
can look at pictures of other men so long as I don't actually cheat. I
got what you might call a clinical interest in the body's and sexual
habits o' sick perverts like you. My personal research tells me, for
example, that most queer men's got nipples what's larger'n normal. Do
YOU???

Large nipples have nothing to do with whether someone is gay or not. Some
men have them, others don't. Just like women.

Post by Bill Baker
If I misconstrued it then it must not have been the truth.

No, it was. You just garbled up the words and tried to say they mean
sumpin' else besides what they mean.

No, what you wrote was pretty clearly not the truth.

Post by Bill Baker
Actually, some men think that women look better with a little extra
weight. More cushion for the pushin' is what they say.

Thurgood wants me to be think and fair and quiet in the bed room.

Tell him to marry a supermodel next time, then. He didn't get a stick
figure, he got you.

Post by Most Holy Mother Tucker
Did i ever tell you about the white shroud and the lily?

I don't believe you did.

Post by Bill Baker
Not at all.

Do they know you're all queer?

They know my sexual preferences, if that's what you mean.

Post by Bill Baker
I live within 500 miles of there.

Why is this such a secret? Will you tell me if'n I get it right?

No, because my answer will always be the same.

Post by Most Holy Mother Tucker
What about Oak Park, Illinois.

I live within 500 miles of there.

Post by Bill Baker
I think it's great that people in the Deep South are starting to learn to
recognize the letters of the alphabet.

Oh please! We are very literate. Just look how much True Gospel
Preaching I churn out ever' day.

It's all 'cause o' that there alphabet larnin'! Have you ever seen the TV
show Squidbillies? It's shows what most people think of when they think of
the Deep South.

Post by Bill Baker
And here I thought you'd gone all civilized on me.

I'm more civilized than what you are. I don't show off in no gay
bars.

Who said I was showing off?

Post by Most Holy Mother Tucker
Were your nipples all hard when the queers were a swarming around you,
brother?

I don't think so, but I can't be sure.

Post by Bill Baker
Flesh? Yes, most queer men do have that.

No, I mean the herpes family o' viruses.

Like you said above, they probably have himpes.

Post by Bill Baker
If it ever does get that way, I'll be sure to go to a secular doctor and
get it taken care of.

That's quite all right. I'll take my chances with a secular doctor anyway.
I've been to them before and have never gotten hooked on any pill of any
kind.

Post by Bill Baker
Isn't that where the incest is more common?

No way! That's in rural area's up in places like Maine and Minnesota
where people get the cabin fever. Don't even get me started on them
Canadians and their frozen smegma.

De-ni-al.

Post by Bill Baker
Not really, and neither do many of my homosexual friends.

Do I gotta teach you ever'thing about homo sexual depravity? How do
you think I find out about alla these queer perversions? I just keep
my ears open when I'm around alla the queers. Looky here...
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Docking_(sex)#Genital-genital_sex

I'm sure your ears aren't all you keep open! Or is that what they call
aural sex? Haw! Haw! Haw!

Post by Bill Baker
What name do you use? Maybe I'll sign up in order to say hello to you
there.

Nah, if he's on there it's probably too perverted for me.

Post by Bill Baker
Nah, you're just trying to get me to say what you want to hear. But
that's OK, this is a lot of fun!

I only want the Truth outa any man - even a perverted uncircumcised
blasphemer.

But if I say something that you don't think is the truth, then you're not
going to believe me anyway.

Post by Most Holy Mother Tucker
I guess you could say I got some kinda thing for you. I will a'way's be
faithful to my husband o' course - but I would like to get to know you
better.

Well you already know more about me than most people on the Internet.

Post by Bill Baker
No, just some laughter from a very strange woman's Usenet posts!

Are you a calling me very strange? You KNOW I ain't nothing like
'at. I'm a good woman.

Who says you have to be bad to be strange?

Post by Most Holy Mother Tucker
I go to Church three times a week at least. I take good cara my family and
friends. I preach the True and Full Gospel and lead sinners to the Lord
ever' day. How does a doing alla them wonderful things make me strange?

None of those makes you strange (well maybe the going to church 3 times a
week does). It's what you post in here.

Post by Bill Baker
From what I can see you're not bad looking.

Does my beauty make you wanna go straight?

How do you know I'm not already? Besides, whether I'm gay or straight I'm
not changing it for any woman or man.

Post by Bill Baker
I'm not surprised to hear that.

My wits are perfectly fine without sending you any pictures of myself.

Post by Bill Baker
Is that what you like to fantasize that I do?

That's kind of the definition of fantasizing.

Post by Bill Baker
I said so? Where?

in the post where you said you'd do what ever it takes.

Who said it ever took that? Your imagination is really running into
overtime.

Post by Bill Baker
Well, too bad then.

You could a'way's join the Church. You won't be able to reveal no
kinda revealing clothes in the Holy Sanctuary.

Only if my camcorder is coming in with me.

Post by Bill Baker
Is that what your Aunt Sister told you?

I don't not no such mixed up relatives. I didn't grow up in the
mountains where people can't get out and mingle.

It's not just in the mountains, you know.

Post by Bill Baker
Nah, I usually crave the taste of a good steak.

Do you mean TUBE steak?!?! Haw! Haw! Haw!

You just can't carry on a conversation without thinking about sex can you?
I think you're more perverted than I am!

Post by Bill Baker
The back winder is near the street?

Pert near, yes. You gotta go down a little walk way to get to the
back winders - but it's all accessible from the side walk.

That sounds like something a voyeur would do.

Post by Bill Baker
The word "Bible" isn't even in the Bible!

It's on the cover!

But it's not inside!

Post by Bill Baker
Not as often as I'd like!

Can you give me a nice round number? Do you have sex ever' week, for
instance? Do you play with your own ding-a-ling?

Well I couldn't give you a round number, since the only round number is
zero. Let's just say I'm pretty busy and don't always have time for it.

Post by Bill Baker
Well, that's not a bat!

It feels like a cannon when it fires me into orbit!

Did you know that you can get into orbit with a bike and a ramp on Deimos,
one of Mars' moons? And a thrown baseball can get into orbit on its other
moon, Phobos.

Post by Bill Baker
Kentucky is part Southern and part Appalachian.

The people there doesn't necessarily think so.

That doesn't surprise me.

Post by Most Holy Mother Tucker
Indiana is right across the river from there, you know. You know about
Indiana, right? Ever been to Fort Wayne?

I've been through there. I never stopped there, though.

Post by Most Holy Mother Tucker
And Michigan is right above Indiana. Tell me about Kalamazoo.

Kalamazoo is where I went to college at Western Michigan University.

Post by Most Holy Mother Tucker
See - I know my geography. Do you ever go to that wicked nudist colony
that's right near where Indiana, Ohio and Kentucky meet?

I've never been there, but it sounds like a fun place to visit!

Post by Most Holy Mother Tucker
Do you consider Ohio a Midwestern State?

Yes, because it is. Here's a list of all the Midwestern states:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Midwestern_United_States

Post by Most Holy Mother Tucker
Are you from Youngstown???

I live within 500 miles of there.

Post by Bill Baker
Hey, whatever you want to believe.

No. That ain't what happened at all. He's my Jewish God father
though.

If you say so.

Post by Bill Baker
Where in the Bible does it say that about the Deep South?

It speaks of the Queen o' the South a rising up to rebuke the world's
last depraved generation.

But it doesn't specifically say the Deep South.

Post by Bill Baker
See? You're still denying your denial.

No I ain't neither. What is it I'm supposta be a denying any way's?

The fact that you're in denial.

Post by Bill Baker
Who would want to have sex in a dark room?

Most queers what goes to the gay bars - which you freely admitted you
do.

Who said I ever had sex there?

Post by Bill Baker
I'd rather the room be bright so I don't miss a second of the action!

Did you ever do it in a hospital bed?

No, but that's not a bad idea.

Post by Bill Baker
I have no idea.

You all didn't never trade names, HUH? Typical queer behavior.

So you know the name of every single person who ever gave you a compliment
in your entire life?

Post by Bill Baker
Bernadette was posting here for several years, though.

I saw right thru her little game the day I moved into that shack over
on Lezbo Lane. Burn-a-dyke was a poisoning my husband on accounta she
wanted to screw around with Sunshine.

But she still fooled everyone else.

Post by Bill Baker
Yes, I know how much your church is into voyeurism.

'Tain't voyeurism - which is all about sex. It's more like
surveillance - which is all about a protecting people from harm.

That's voyeurism.

Post by Bill Baker
I thought you said some tries to crawl up your leg?

That's the virally infected kind. O' course, you got plentya that in
them queer flesh gyms too.

Post by Bill Baker
If that's the case, then why can't it crawl through a vent?

The little polly wogs all dies eventually, probably from the AIDS.

So there you go. By your own admission it could have just crawled through
the vents.

Post by Bill Baker
Why don't you just get God to tell you if you want to know so badly?

He decided to withhold dorect disclosure from me for now.

Sounds like God doesn't think you can handle the truth.

Post by Bill Baker
I'm within 500 miles of there.

Is Pennsylvania Mid Western or Mid Atlantic? What about Pittsburgh?

Why don't you look it up? Wikipedia is a good resource.

Post by Bill Baker
I'm within 500 miles of there, too.

I wanna know EXACTLY where you are.

And I want to make millions of dollars without having to do anything to earn
it. Looks like neither one of us is getting what we want.

Post by Bill Baker
Then you must be bringing it back with you from your spirit journeys.

No. I ain't been out 'at far still yet.

Then how do you know they're out there?

Post by Bill Baker
See what I mean about doing God's will?

I a'way's do God's Will. I just know I gotta be careful not to get
all carried away like old Icarus done with his wings.

So you have wax wings in the afterlife?

Post by Bill Baker
Is that so? I'll have to remember that.

That's True when it comes to you asking for proofa God's promises and
special blessings.

Now you didn't say that. No sneaky changing the rules in the middle of the
game!

Post by Bill Baker
Nope, none of those things.

Highblood pressure, fallen arches, gas pains, clap o' the yap?

Not those, either.

It must be real short then.

Or I'm just really careful.

Post by Bill Baker
Even if all that's true, it's still hearsay.

But it passed muster with Dr. Hubert Hickey - future prince of all
America.

Even if that's true, it's still hearsay.

Post by Bill Baker
You're the one who said you didn't want to spread diseases to other
planets, even if it was God's will.

I didn't put it that-a-way. I said I didn't wanna be the one to
spread viral plagues from one spiral nebula to t'other.

But what if it's God's will that you do that? Wouldn't you be disobeying
him if you didn't?

Post by Bill Baker
I thought I read in here that you had one though? One of the other
posters was talking about it.

That was Scotty in Fort Lumbardwell. He was just a kidding.

I don't know, he sounded pretty serious.

Post by Most Holy Mother Tucker
Like you, he KNOWS better'n 'at. He's even my Facebook friend. You could
be too, you know. Are you a gonna look for "Radical" over on the
Squirt web site?

Nah, I don't need to pick up strange old men on some website.

Post by Bill Baker
But you sure couldn't stop Sunshine from getting an abortion, could you?

I thought you were going to have fourteen or more? Won't your father start
drawing eggs on the wall and crossing them out if you don't continue to have
babies? Don't you hear the screams of your unfertilized eggs?

Post by Bill Baker
I already sent you nineteen.

I mean of YOU!

Sorry, I don't take pictures of myself.

That's a good thing. Some men get all wet and gooey down there.

That can happen. But if you wash it, it won't get diseased or infected.

Post by Bill Baker
So why don't they have a right to practice their religion? Don't you
think they should have the same rights as you?

In a True Theocracy they will have to choose from a lista approved
religions. Satanism won't be on it.

Well you can have your theocracy. Most people would rather live in a free
country.

Post by Bill Baker
Why are you so hateful towards other people's religion?

I ain't. I love ever'body - even the faggots.

But you hate other people's religion.

Post by Bill Baker
I thought you wanted people to respect your religion. Why can't you respect theirs?

I do - if'n it's a real religion such as Buddhism or Christian Science
or Judaism. I got no time for $cientology or the "Rev" Ike.

Why not? Don't they have a right to believe what they want?

Post by Bill Baker
Doesn't matter if they're grateful or not, it's still rape.

No it ain't. How come ain't nobody ever complaint about that kinda
treatment.

I can think of a number of reasons that's practiced by sexual perverts.

Post by Bill Baker
There's no condom that I've seen that includes that particular instruction.

Look again. Maybe you missed 'at part in your amazement over the siza
the ding-dong in the picture they showed.
http://www.trojancondoms.com/ArticleDetails.aspx?ArticleId=10

It looks pretty small to me.

Post by Most Holy Mother Tucker
At least these instructions glorify STRAIGHT sex over queer.

Post by Bill Baker
By inviting a guy on a horse clad in latex to join...oh, I see what
you're thinking.

Only a pervert would make 'at connection. The man on the horse is
supposta suggest sex appeal - and that real sexy people take
precautions.

So...the man on the horse suggests sex appeal but we're not supposed to
think he's sexy enough to have sex with?

Post by Most Holy Mother Tucker
Our Holy Church is diff'rent from t'others in 'at we teach that it's a
good thing for sex deviats to use rubbers ever' time. We don;t want their
diseases OR their unwanted children a polluting God's Creation.

Maybe they think the same about you.

Post by Bill Baker
If that's what you want to imagine.

What about my preaching is untrue to life - in your opinion at least.
Do you shave your nutty buddy's?

Pretty much everything you preach is either wildly inaccurate or at least
greatly exaggerated.

Post by Bill Baker
If you're not screaming and thrashing about at the height of ecstasy then
you're doing something wrong.

We ain't a doing nothing wrong.

Good, I'm glad to hear you no longer have to lie there like a corpse.

Post by Bill Baker
Why would it take more than that if they go SPLAT so easily?

Some of 'em's soaked in pee by 'at time.

So you admit that it doesn't take much to dislodge these "chunks" you claim
to see.

Post by Bill Baker
Why worry about ending so soon when you can just go again in another hour?

He can't do that no more.

What a slacker.

Post by Bill Baker
Imagination sounds like experience? That sure explains a lot.

Why don't you show insteada just a telling me stuff?

You want a picture of me rimming somebody? I thought you didn't like that
stuff?

Post by Bill Baker
I don't remember anyone in the Bible talking about Allah.

I'll sell you a CD of my a pronouncing them two words for ou to clear
up any kinda confusion, OK? Only $1.

It doesn't matter how you pronounce it. I just know you're trying to sneak
in some Islamic propaganda into your preaching!

Post by Bill Baker
Not from what I've seen here in this post alone!

Hah! That's just you a trying to pee in my clean mountain stream.

No need to with all of the fish mating in there.

Post by Bill Baker
Yep, and the same with other religions, too.

Our'n is the only True One though.

That's what the other religions say, too.