Jack Schitt
2012-02-21 12:07:01 UTC
-I found an old black bag full of drugs floating in a bath yesterday. I
called an ambulance, but Whitney was dead by the time they arrived.
-What's white, 6 inches long, and won't be sucked on Valentine's Day?
Whitney's Crack Pipe.
-When the paramedics arrived they said "Its Houston we have a problem".
-Nintendo are releasing a new game based on the lives of Amy Winehouse and
Whitney Houston. It's called WiiHab.
-What was Whitney Houston doing in the bath tub? Washing her crack.
-Large amount of prescription drugs found in Whitney's room... I bet Jacko's
doctor is shitting himself.
-What's the difference between Whitney Houston and Amy Winehouse? 204 days.
-What's the difference between Whitney Houston and Michael Jackson? One was
a crackhead and one fucked little boys.
-What's black, lies on the floor 'Will Always Love You' and has white stuff
around its nose? A border collie.
-A back single mother overdoses... what's the big deal?
-Some sources claim that Whitney Houston is not really dead and that she's
in character for her new film 'The Bodybag'.
-Charlie Sheen better die soon or heaven will run out of crack before he
gets there.
-Whitney Houston cause of death: she waited too long to exhale.
-What's white and has two holes? The inside of Whitney's nose.
-Is it really snowing or did Whitney sneeze??
-What was Whitney Houston's biggest hit? Her last one.
-Why did Whitney Houston snort Splenda? She thought that it was Diet Coke.
-Isn't it somewhat ironic that a woman who hasn't been clean for years
managed to die in a bath?
-Tragic news from the music industry "Justin Bieber still alive!"
-Whitney Houston died just hours after being asked to be a judge on the next
season of X-Factor. Personally I think she made the right decision.
-A full day of Whitney Houston on MTV. I don't know who is in hell, us or
her.
-With Whitney Houston now dead I think we'll see a vast improvement in her
live shows.
-I bet they didn't need to draw any white lines around Whitney Houston's
body.
-So Whitney died... now she's reunited with her career.
-Can everybody waiting to mourn over Whitney's death please form a line?
It's what she would have wanted.
-On the day that Whitney Houston died Bobby Brown still played a gig. I mean
it's pretty disgusting... what kind of people pay to see Bobby Brown?
-Whitney Houston found dead. Columbian economy collapses.
-Two detectives are in Whitney Houston's hotel room. One says to the other
"I've never heard of her. What was she famous for?" The other copper replies
"She was a very well-known musician". The first detective looks around and
says "Ah, I see now. Let me guess, she played the spoons?"
-Dear Lord, thank you for answering my prayers. However you seem to have
made a terrible error. I said "Britney" not "Whitney".
-For the first time since the early 90's, Whitney Houston has everyone
talking about her latest 'Hit'.
-Confusion in heaven today as Whitney Houston tries to explain to Michael
Jackson why 5 year old crack is bad.
-Live from the Beverly Hills Hospital's Life Support Division: Whitney
Houston Unplugged.
-Decorations will be different in the Houston house this coming Christmas.
There will still be a tree but fewer needles lying on the floor.
-Everyone seems so saddened by the death of Whitney Houston. What saddens me
more is her greatest hits album will surely be out soon.
-Whitney Houston lived her life as I ski - face down in a pile of white
powder.
-Whitney Houston has now been drug free for at least one day.
-Whitney Houston ended her life the same way she ended her songs. On a high
note.
-It is such a shame to hear about Whitney Houston dying of a drug overdose.
I was truly hoping that she died in a car crash while giving Mariah Carey
and Celine Dion a lift.
-Yesterday I heard that the world had just lost a great asset to the music
industry. One whom many referred to as 'The Queen of Pop' and I'd just like
to take a moment and say we will miss her greatly. May Elton John rest in
peace.
called an ambulance, but Whitney was dead by the time they arrived.
-What's white, 6 inches long, and won't be sucked on Valentine's Day?
Whitney's Crack Pipe.
-When the paramedics arrived they said "Its Houston we have a problem".
-Nintendo are releasing a new game based on the lives of Amy Winehouse and
Whitney Houston. It's called WiiHab.
-What was Whitney Houston doing in the bath tub? Washing her crack.
-Large amount of prescription drugs found in Whitney's room... I bet Jacko's
doctor is shitting himself.
-What's the difference between Whitney Houston and Amy Winehouse? 204 days.
-What's the difference between Whitney Houston and Michael Jackson? One was
a crackhead and one fucked little boys.
-What's black, lies on the floor 'Will Always Love You' and has white stuff
around its nose? A border collie.
-A back single mother overdoses... what's the big deal?
-Some sources claim that Whitney Houston is not really dead and that she's
in character for her new film 'The Bodybag'.
-Charlie Sheen better die soon or heaven will run out of crack before he
gets there.
-Whitney Houston cause of death: she waited too long to exhale.
-What's white and has two holes? The inside of Whitney's nose.
-Is it really snowing or did Whitney sneeze??
-What was Whitney Houston's biggest hit? Her last one.
-Why did Whitney Houston snort Splenda? She thought that it was Diet Coke.
-Isn't it somewhat ironic that a woman who hasn't been clean for years
managed to die in a bath?
-Tragic news from the music industry "Justin Bieber still alive!"
-Whitney Houston died just hours after being asked to be a judge on the next
season of X-Factor. Personally I think she made the right decision.
-A full day of Whitney Houston on MTV. I don't know who is in hell, us or
her.
-With Whitney Houston now dead I think we'll see a vast improvement in her
live shows.
-I bet they didn't need to draw any white lines around Whitney Houston's
body.
-So Whitney died... now she's reunited with her career.
-Can everybody waiting to mourn over Whitney's death please form a line?
It's what she would have wanted.
-On the day that Whitney Houston died Bobby Brown still played a gig. I mean
it's pretty disgusting... what kind of people pay to see Bobby Brown?
-Whitney Houston found dead. Columbian economy collapses.
-Two detectives are in Whitney Houston's hotel room. One says to the other
"I've never heard of her. What was she famous for?" The other copper replies
"She was a very well-known musician". The first detective looks around and
says "Ah, I see now. Let me guess, she played the spoons?"
-Dear Lord, thank you for answering my prayers. However you seem to have
made a terrible error. I said "Britney" not "Whitney".
-For the first time since the early 90's, Whitney Houston has everyone
talking about her latest 'Hit'.
-Confusion in heaven today as Whitney Houston tries to explain to Michael
Jackson why 5 year old crack is bad.
-Live from the Beverly Hills Hospital's Life Support Division: Whitney
Houston Unplugged.
-Decorations will be different in the Houston house this coming Christmas.
There will still be a tree but fewer needles lying on the floor.
-Everyone seems so saddened by the death of Whitney Houston. What saddens me
more is her greatest hits album will surely be out soon.
-Whitney Houston lived her life as I ski - face down in a pile of white
powder.
-Whitney Houston has now been drug free for at least one day.
-Whitney Houston ended her life the same way she ended her songs. On a high
note.
-It is such a shame to hear about Whitney Houston dying of a drug overdose.
I was truly hoping that she died in a car crash while giving Mariah Carey
and Celine Dion a lift.
-Yesterday I heard that the world had just lost a great asset to the music
industry. One whom many referred to as 'The Queen of Pop' and I'd just like
to take a moment and say we will miss her greatly. May Elton John rest in
peace.